This is way too much discussion about the problem for me, which reminds me why I haven't posted on this here thread yet. I desperately need the solution, not better understanding of my problem. To heck with my problem. To heck with me, me, me. And to heck with John's wife. Oh, and to heck with the IRS, too!
Love!!
- Dov
PS. Really, this is just paraphrasing rabeinu b's post above, in my own language. His post was in yeshivish and mine is in addictish ;D.

Gevalt! Rabbeinu Dov!!

Very few people understand the great amkus of your posts. (I wish that I understood them  )

P.S. Will you finger paint with me in heck(ll)?

the little wisdom I have on this subjet also tells me that Dov is very wise. But as the handbook points out we need to stop lusting. We need to be aware that we are lusting even a little bit. so I, without wisdom, think that we need to talk about the little things that trigger us,  at least a little.

I have been following this thread for a while now & didn't know how or what to say about it.

I just don't think going into the amkus why, how, where, when, what, with Johns wife.

I don't believe in getting into the shakle v'taryeh with the Menuval. The more we go back & forth with the Menuval in the logic of it all just gets us into trouble in the end.

Suddenly Reb Dov comes along & just says something sooooo simple yet sooooo true that as far as I'm concerned puts this conversation to bed.

It comes down to one thing!

I need to be focusing on staying clean & johns wife wont let me stay clean therefore Johns wife just aint something I should have anything to do with, Period!

No ifs or buts.

Its not a discussion at all

Gevaldig!

Dov (do I understand you correctly?) is saying... let go of lust.

it is poison.

Its feeding the ego,

and the IRS (they soon are going to start taxing the seedy side of the internet).


But there are many who have not yet hit bottom.

k

The Satan wont let the IRS tax the shumtz. He know better than that.

I don't argue with Dov, BUT the thoughts mentioned here
1. Woman are people to a relationship with not lust at.
2. Any frum lady, who is not your wife, is the same to you as a woman in Nigeria.
3. When we lust we don't want  a relationship, we just want to have a rush to block out emotions.
all helped me allot.

with all due respect, maybe we should change the title of this thread?

You're right. I changed it to "Harry's wife" 

No no no
With all "due" respect
Leave the title

Yoelis wife
Yitzies
Yankies
All are to you
Like johns wife

John and Harry are both nuts and the wife/wives are crazier than them.

if I come across Harry's wife on the street I make the logical assumption that she is a serial killer.

outer beauty can cover up alot of sewage and real sick stuff,viruses,bacteria,hate,envy,greed,ect ect

it's a mask.

ever saw V-the mini series?

nice looking people that are lizards

many people with external beauty are this way

and when it is a bas yisroel,and you can't come to such a harsh conclusions because we look at the good,then we have to see the "Lo Sachmoed" sign that Hashem puts up for us telling us "nothing doing" here for you.

like a far sighted guy wearing glasses that near sighted people wear.

It will destroy your eyes.

and your neshomah too.

it's simply not good for you

even physically,in the "olam hazeh" sense,it's bad for you.

when you pass the test you will see this clearly

 

Why Harry? Harry is more Jewish sounding than John and that is Rabbi B's point that all women except your wife are the same as woman from Nigeria or Algeria or Mali for that matter.

I just thought your name must be john, so you didn't like it  Just kidding around, bud...

I guess you figured out why some people were busy posting here.

Holy Yid wrote on 07 Oct 2009 23:51:

Holy Yid,
Agreed, 100%. Really. As a matter of fact, if I could not talk openly with somebody about all the goofy and gross ideas that pop into my head, I'd certainly eventually act them out! "We are only as sick as our secrets" they so wisely say. So, more power (and Holy-ness) to you!
But making a study of it is an entirely different matter to me. It doesn't deserve all that much attention. And that was all I really meant.
It all depends on what I want. If I want to keep thinking about lust, or why I lust, then I'll be in it. I tend to then do more of it. If, on the other hand, I just want to finally get free of it, then I'll find someone safe to dump it to, ask My Best Eternal Friend to help me out, and then focus 100% of my brain and body energies on thinking about and doing whatever it is that I am supposed to actually thinking about and doing. And most of the time it's: giving - to my clients, wife, children, Whoever. And I'll just have to be content assuming that I'm a bit of a nut for having really, honestly believed (for a minute) that doing such an assinine (or evil) thing could possibly have been in my best interest! Nu. I'm nuts that way.
I am not telling you or anyone what to do, just admitting (again) that I can't think myself into right behavior. I can only live myself into right thinking. The analysis is very tempting, but letting go of it and doing right does me more good. That's all.
Does that sit well with you?