Weeping uncontrollably a distraught mother one day called on a Chassidic Rebbe. “Rebbe,” she exclaimed, “It’s my son; he’s acting really strange; I think he needs a psychiatrist!”.

“What’s the matter,” asked the Rebbe, visibly concerned.

“The matter?” cried the woman, “he’s behaving like a lowlife! He was observed dancing with gentile women and eating swine! I’m telling you, he went Mishuga.

The Rebbe pondered the crisis for a quiet moment. “My dear lady,” he then declared: The good news is that your son is far from Mishuga.”.

“You see, if your son were dancing with pigs and eating women, I’d say that he is indeed insane, but that’s not what you describe. The characteristics you present are that of ‘sinfulness’ not ‘insanity.’”.

“No, no; your son is not crazy. He has rather become a crude and lascivious young man, and there’s nothing crazy about it. ”.

Yankel appeared in Shul one day with both his ears heavily bandaged. “I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang,” he sheepishly explained. “That explains one ear,” blurted a fellow congregant, “But what about the other?” “My luck,” came the reply, “the guy decided to call back.”.

There was a man who was talking over his concerns with his family doctor, "Doc, I think my wife is going deaf.".

The doctor answered, "Well, try this when you go home so you can test her hearing. Ask her a question from some distance away. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Repeat this until she answers, then you will be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is.".

The man went home and did what the doctor said. He walked in the door and called out, "Honey, I'm home. What's for dinner?" He didn't hear any answer. He moved closer to her, "Honey, I'm home. What's for dinner?". Still no answer.

Again and again he repeated this until finally he was standing right in front of her, "Honey, I'm home. What's for dinner?".

"For the tenth time," she screamed, "We're having POTROAST!".