Shalom,

Which here is the continuation(suite) of my message is in the column(section) "presentation"("display")

I susi in the grip of zera levatala for a long time and I cannot it any more, I am 23 years old, always not married and me am only falling(flopping). I realized 2 months ago Facebook was a trap for me, I looked at the photos of the girls / women and it was for me an opportunity(occasion) of fall, as a result, after a big internal fight, I unsubscribed of Facebook. I realized while this site exercised a certain influence on me, as if it held(retained) me prisoner with "ropes" and wanted that I remain connected. Behind Facebook, I am now persuaded, hides the yetser hara. It is a very powerful social site to make people fall(flop).


Today, that makes me this weight less on shoulders, but, regrettably, I have it the others. Sometimes I fall in the pornography. In fact, I noticed that often I make efforts, during 2-3 months, but at the end, it's as if due to holding on too much, that exploded....

I concentrate in the Torah, the téfila, but after a while, it's as if my body could not it any more hold on, and that it had to evacuate. Then I fall again during a few days, and I make total = (

I do not know if the fact of marrying me is going to help me to solve the problem, but be that as it may, I am 23 years old, no friend / fiancée / woman, and I do not know it, thus the marriage it is not for tomorrow(just around the corner).....

I can no more this situation which kills me little by little, and I am afraid that one day, I really fall with a woman.....

Hello there, reb Yid!




But not today please. Did you read the Handbook? As I waited for my father in the mall right now I did some chazore on it. It basically says (by attitude 13 i think) that its takke hard to fight for the whole life. So fight just today for today. (BTW, you will hear it hundreds of times here in the forum, i promise it, heh).

Be matzliach. And btw, the holy Handbook says as well (if i remember right, better check it) that shemiras eynaim and machshovo is the ikar.

try it, after a while its geshmak.

First of all it's great you're identifying (Facebook being one of them) what makes you fall, bc the reasons are unique to each individual. My advice is to think of all the situations that make you fall and to work on avoiding them.

If the circumstances are right, then I would consider marriage, but I defo would not rush into marriage as a solution to lust. There would be nothing worse than marrying the wrong girl when you're not ready for marriage just to save yourself from falling. 23 is still very young. I'm now 27 and I haven't even dated a girl before, mainly because of time constraints imposed by my job and studies.

A great piece of advice I was recently given was not to fight the desire but instead to replace it with a healthier one. Instead of looking at porn maybe check out sports cars, amazing houses whatever takes your fancy. Doing heavy weights at the gym/cardio also really helps to take the edge off of the lust.

Hope that helps,

DL

Thank you very much for your answer! (There are some sentences that my translation software did not manage to translate, did not sadden I am French).

Yes I printed in French the textbook(manual worker) " to keep(guard) the eyes ", I began to read it, it is great, very complete.

It is true that it is a battle from day to day, moreover I joined today because for this morning it is the disaster with internet ...... = ' (

I began one year ago has body-building in room, well, my head always finds an opportunity(occasion) of hang, the yetser hara is really firm.... But well I continue to fight(dispute) even if I fall often, fortunately that I stubborn susi as a mule, it saves me, to continue to hope!

It is true that 23 years it is still young, but for years I dream to have my wife, my family, and maybe it is what what is going to help me most. I ask Hashem a lot, and I make many fasts so that He(It) frees(delivers) me and makes me deserving marrying me as soon as possible. I asked for a blessing by intern in the rav Kanievsky and in the minyan in Israel which prays 40 days in Kotel.

I puts the package because I feel(smell) that more time goes by and more the fight is rough for me. I try to put the maximum of chances from my part.

Thank you for your fast and complete answer!

1.I share this hope as wel, and it gives me chizzuk as well. But from experience I would doubt, if THAT IS what will help most. yetzer will say (and probably did already) "oh common, you can always do teshuva" or "oh well, haShem like to do hessed so much, he will give you a fitting wife even if you sin".

2.dear yirmeyah, i did it as well (fast), but they (e.g. mishna berura, r. reisman (if you didnt hear his shiurim yet, DO IT!)) say its not the way. If you want to make a taanit, so make taanit dibur.

p.s. if you won't find any shiurim (shel r. yisroel reisman) pm me your email, I'll send them to you

chatzlocho