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TOPIC: TaPHSiK 491 Views

TaPHSiK 12 Jul 2012 23:17 #141426

rt
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Well, I thought, I have to share it.

my plan for the next week: (how to stay sober, from friday 13 july til friday 20 july)
1.shmirat eynayim. knas for histaklus: 5 sec atzimas eynayim on spot, if not 1 € to tzedoke
2.shmirat machshovo. not to think about this very cute, just cute or even not even cute shikzas out there. if not, for each "time" 10 euro tzedoke
3.each day at least 20min GYE (exept forum),. if not, for each day 20 euro tzedoke.
4.before each nefila to read all this 90.000 or so reasons not to act out (started by steeble). if not, 50 € tzedoke
5.after each nefila 50 euro to tzedoka.

hagaha:biish'at nefila lo shayach numero dos (2)
heara: dawn to haShem.

hopefully i will not have to give all my money to tzedaka :o (at least, not bevause of that)

good night chevra, R"T

Re: TaPHSiK 13 Jul 2012 00:44 #141430

obormottel OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1440 Karma: 6	Hatzlocho! Mottel
	Baby steps. If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas! Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans.

Re: TaPHSiK 17 Jul 2012 22:02 #141855

rt Current streak: 3 days OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 260 Karma: 0	Hmm, the feeling of being alone in the yeshiva is kinda interesting...we have beyn hazmanim. no1 around. Baruch haShem I was able to be shoymer my machshovos. but it is still kind of a sad depressing atmosphere around. Any suggestions what to do against such feelings ? R"T

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 03:55 #141966

justkeepgoing OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 291 Karma: 2	Get out of the dorm and get connected with people. The boredom and the loneliness can really mess a guy up. It says that a man who marries a woman, even if they have money and servants and she doesnt need to work, the husband can tell her to work becuase otherwise, with all that free time on her hands she could go crazy. We dont want to go crazy, now do we? DO WE?!?!?!??? :o

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 14:42 #141995

rt Current streak: 3 days OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 260 Karma: 0	No, we dont

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 14:54 #141997

Machshovo Tova OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1230 Karma: 26	Yeah, we need to avoid the boredom/bedroom syndrome. MT

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 15:28 #142004

rt
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Dear MT, I am not bored bichlal. i have my seforim, i dont have time to get bored. its something else.
its this loneliness feeling as the keepgoingdude (tell me if you dont like

)said.
i am sitting alone (or there are 2-3 more yidden) in the beis hamedrash. hazzering the massechtas. but i feel kinda sad being alone. dont know why. Its defenitly not the feeling "why do i have to learn while everybdy else is having a nice life". what could be better, as some hours spent on a gemore ?

regards, R"T

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 15:41 #142008

rt
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One of the most meaningful things that we can take out of a fall (particularly after a long clean streak) besides for brushing up on our defenses and strengthening our barriers, is simply the humility that we get when we realize that in spite of how well we were doing, we were able to fall - just like that.

This humility renews our connection with Hashem. The more we feel how much we NEED Hashem's constant mercy and help each day, the more connected and dependant we are on Him. And this kesher is so precious to Hashem, that sometimes He brings a Tzadik to fall for that reason alone.

Similarly, we quoted Dov yesterday:

I cannot accept that Hashem brought you through this problem just to get you out of it so you could just move on from here as though nothing happened. He could have protected you from getting into the problem in the first place, no? To quote Rav Noach Weinberg,"He found a way to get your attention", probably because he was missing you a whole lot. This IS your trip, not just an accident He "saved" you from.

And that is perhaps why Hashem sometimes brings us to fall, even when we are doing so well. Hashem gave us this disease because He wanted our attention. And maybe we start to get too complacent and self-confident after a while, and we begin to lose this precious kesher with Hashem...

I just read it in a chizzuk mail. WOW!!!

You know guys/GYE'S. the only thing that is holding gaave away from me is THIS very yetzer. i mean, all this people around sing praises but I KNOW how much of a tzaddik i really am. and if somebody does something bad in my eyes, i still can think, "common that is not so bad .. SOME PEOPLE DO THINGS MUCH WORSE".. i am not an onov (alevay), but this is how i am staying away at least from fleyshige gayve.
and you know what? as soon as i start to have 1-2+ monthes sober, guess what happens.

mamash, this mail was MAMASH very helpful. shkoach reb GUARD
hatzlocho

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 19:24 #142034

justkeepgoing
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SO true. Loved that.

RT I know that you have what to do, its just that in the end of the day (at least for me) A sefer isnt a replica of a real-life human bean. You need human beans to relate to.

I heard that the problem with chasidim is that they have a rebbe they think they dont need a rebbe, the problem with litvacks is they have a sefer they dont think they need a rebbe.

You need BOTH

(not trying to offend anybody here c'v I was simply bringing out the point)(its not even true anyways..)

- keepgoingdude (I Love it!)

Re: TaPHSiK 19 Jul 2012 22:50 #142061

rt
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Well.
1.you meant human being not human bean, right? (bean is kinda kitniyes.)
2.i do agree with you. not only in theory, bepoel as well (=chavrusas, i am speaking with people, right now even call more often home (used to be once a day, now twice))
3.i dont feel offended, dont think anybody does.

P.S.

I heard that the problem with chasidim is that they have a rebbe they think they dont need a rebbe

you mean, they think they dont need a sefer? right ?

Hugs. R"T

Re: TaPHSiK 20 Jul 2012 01:42 #142082

justkeepgoing OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 291 Karma: 2	1. Human BEANS! 2. (corresponds to your 2) you never know, there could be a chasidishe litvak just around the forum, and youd never see him coming. better safe than sorry. 3. Yes I meant sefer Thank you I have received your "Hug" and wish to inform you I have sent you one back! Bear HUG! OY! not a bear!? oh the horror! uhh.... 8)

Re: TaPHSiK 20 Jul 2012 15:33 #142127

rt
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so, whats a human bean?

anyways. i hate to make new commitment for the next week.
my plan for the next week: (how to stay sober, from friday 21 july til friday 28 july)
1.shmirat eynayim. knas for histaklus: 10 (!!!) sec atzimas eynayim on spot, if not 1 € to tzedoke
2.shmirat machshovo. not to think about this shikzas out there. if not, for each "time" 10 euro tzedoke
3.each day at least 20min GYE (exept forum),. if not, for each day 20 euro tzedoke.
4.before each nefila to read 15 hizzuk mails. if not, 50 € tzedoke
5.after each nefila 50 euro to tzedoka.

hagaha:biish'at nefila lo shayach number 2
heara: dawn to haShem.

a gitten shabbes.

p.s.i didnt receive any hugs. efshar wrong address?

if it comes back, try 1 more time.

Re: TaPHSiK 27 Jul 2012 13:58 #142556

rt
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new clean week (hopefully).

my plan for the next week: (how to stay sober, from friday 27 july til friday 3 august)
1.shmirat eynayim. knas for histaklus: 10 sec atzimas eynayim ASAP, if not 1 € to tzedoke
2.shmirat machshovo. not to think about this shikzas out there. if not, for each "time" 10 euro tzedoke
3.each day at least 20min GYE (exept forum),. if not, for each day 20 euro tzedoke.
4.before each nefila to read 15 hizzuk mails. if not, 50 € tzedoke
5.after each nefila 50 euro to tzedoka.

hagaha:biish'at nefila lo shayach number 2
heara: dawn to haShem.

a gitten shabbes.
and hatzlocho to you guys.

Re: TaPHSiK 02 Aug 2012 22:07 #142856

rt
Current streak: 3 days
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my plan for the next week: (how to stay sober, from friday 3 august til friday 10 august)
1.shmirat eynayim. knas for histaklus: atzimas eynayim ASAP til i count up to 10, if not 1 € to tzedoke
2.shmirat machshovo. not to think about this shikzas out there. if not, for each choshuve "time" 10 euro tzedoke
3.each day at least 20min GYE (exept forum),. if not, for each day 20 euro tzedoke.
4.before each nefila to read 15 hizzuk mails. if not, 50 € tzedoke
5.after each nefila 50 euro to tzedoka.

hagaha:biish'at nefila lo shayach number 2
heara: dawn to haShem.

a gitten shabbes.
and hatzlocho to you guys.

Re: TaPHSiK 10 Aug 2012 14:48 #143406

rt
Current streak: 3 days
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Gold Boarder
Posts: 260
Karma: 0

new clean week (hopefully).

my plan for the next week: (how to stay sober, from friday 10 august til friday 17 august)
1.shmirat eynayim.
2.shmirat machshovo. not to think about this shikzas out there. if not, for each "time" 10 euro tzedoke
3.each day at least 20 min recovery things. if not, for each day 20 euro tzedoke.
4.before each nefila to read 15 hizzuk mails. if not, 50 € tzedoke
5.after each nefila 50 euro to tzedoka.

hagaha:biish'at nefila lo shayach number 2
heara: dawn to haShem.

a gitten shabbes.
and hatzlocho to you guys.