I was going so well, 45 days since i found GYE, and then out of nowhere circumstance transpired that i fell,looked,and acted
in one part i feel as awful as i used to but in another way, i realised i had never gone as long as this time.
Does anyone have any good advice to the first time faller- i think its crucial from here on in how i go
i de-activated facebook
and whilst i have K9, i am really struggling to understand all the filtering and accountability software and cost
i am most interested for a smart phone
ofcourse,ive read all on this site, but its mainly for a US audience or israel, and i am in neither

Hi Newstart,

First thing: always think positively. That doesn't mean go and bury your head in the sand with your legs sticking out and deny the truth or reality. However, going 45 days clean is a big achievement and it isn't easy so you give yourself a pat on the back for that.

2nd thing - Don't get depressed, beat yourself up and fall into the vicious circle of apathy, inaction and further falls. Instead, use this fall to your advantage. I see you're already tightening your fences, but you need to HONESTLY assess what led to this fall and avoid repeating the same mistake in the future. Half the time, we're just  in denial that something is a problem bc we don't want to let it go.

Finally, this is my 6th year of freedom from the addiction, but I still need to be careful, struggle and still occasionally fall. It's a lifelong process, but you've taken the most important step, which is the first one. DON'T give up now, you are on the road to a better life.

We are always here for you.

BW,

DL

Hey newstart,

I just fell after 180 days clean... Pretty tough! I know though that it won't be a big deal if I just get up now and continue from where I left off. If I do that, I'll be able to look back in a few day and smile, knowing that it's not such a big deal in the scheme of things. I don't want to fall a million more times though. I just want to get up now and move forward.

Do the same: take some action that you think will help you get back up!

Keep going

thanks for these inspirational replies
45 days is great but i could feel i was slipping and stopped putting the effort in that i did for say the first 20 days.

yes, i read the guard your eyes literature today and before i fell, i realised the addiction was just a symptom of depression and the seretonin was being fired up by these thoughts and images before i fell . i was looking for a quick brain fix
clearly, i need to work on the cause- depression and escapism- and ive been on anti-depressants for 11 years whilst living a very normal life, and im slowly coming off them to no ill effect, but clearly ive still deep issues im trying to work on myself
i believe depression in my case to be 70% genetic and down to poor nutritional content so im taking fish oil and magnesium supplements and they really help!

anyway, its hard for everyone i know but i wonder how many people are in the same boat of say, 20 to 30 days fine with no thoughts and then suddenly its starts to hit - i appreciate others have it more often and im grateful i lasted 45 days and want to obviously grow and move forward.

Hi Newstart,

Glad to hear you're coming off the anti-depressants. I knew somebody who was taking them, and they really don't do you any good, they only make you worse. Healthy body, healthy mind- I think that's how it goes anyway lol! Totally understand the escapism - but all masturbation does is take you to death and hell eventually. Being 'healthy' may be boring and even painful at first, but it is does pay dividends in gold and not in fake glitter. 

BW,

DL