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I'm about to FALL!!

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TOPIC: I'm about to FALL!! 217868 Views

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 22 Nov 2011 19:40 #126368

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	I'll have to ask our historian-librarian-possum-loving-friend. Zem?
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 22 Nov 2011 20:28 #126377

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	not impossumable but rather improbable
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 15:50 #127609

Old Freind
Current streak: 1 day
OFFLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 168
Karma: 1

I have my wife sitting right next to me, thinking this is day 5. and my incongnito browser is open to the nicest porn I have found on [REMOVED BY ADMIN - PLEASE DON'T POST HOW YOU FIND PORN OR BYPASS YOUR FILTER. THANK YOU]. Don't worry i saved the search term in draft emails, so that even if I overcome this nissayon, it will be waiting for me the next time.

i don't want to do it, i don't have any interest in doing it, i am really sick (no connection to the addiction- sorry DOv), and I won't rest as long as I can be on the computer! i get sicker every day, and keep wasting all my waking hours on HERE. but naturally the addiction chooses, even for 1 minute it's worth it. Even with my wife catching me, nu so what? mybe i can get her to also enjoy it?

mybe I am finnaly gonna see the bottom of the pit? [Even though R bards says it's only relative]. So to rephrase mybe i should just let this happen, untill I am fed-up enough to surrender my will in all areas of my life. To surrended olam hazeh for an olam ruchni.

Last Edit: 05 Dec 2011 13:55 by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 15:53 #127610

Old Freind Current streak: 1 day OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 168 Karma: 1	Anonimity to the wind. I'm open for anyone on Gmail--- even gmail voice/video. midashayesod@gmail.com
	Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 15:57 #127611

obormottel
OFFLINE
Platinum Boarder
Posts: 1440
Karma: 6

I can hear my Yetzer talking.... through your post. Falling "one last time" so that you can see the botom of the pit is malarkey. You're on the bottom if you can't control it, but you can't see it, because I could never see it.
But the truth is, even your Yetzer wants you to NOT succumb. So don't!
G-d love you.
Mottel
P.S. Sorry can't take you up on google chat - my kids are in the room. Stay strong.

Baby steps.
If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas!

Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans.

Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 16:49 #127617

Old Freind Current streak: 1 day OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 168 Karma: 1	i'm fallign to peices.... ...no kidding. Mybe some chesbon hanefesh, and quiet time away from the computer.
	Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 19:40 #127633

me3 Current streak: 97 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1229 Karma: 9	Put on your sneakers and run away from it all literally and figuratively
	Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 20:07 #127636

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 383	Are you saying that you are unable to remain sober? Then come out and say it. And I will join you.
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 21:30 #127641

Old Freind Current streak: 1 day OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 168 Karma: 1	I cannot stay sober I am powerless over my lust Lust is a power greater than me
	Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 04 Dec 2011 22:14 #127642

obormottel OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1440 Karma: 6	beautiful! that's exactly how I feel.
	Baby steps. If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas! Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans. Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 05 Dec 2011 00:03 #127648

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 383	Good morning. Take it easy, amigo. 8)
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 05 Dec 2011 19:33 #127747

in control bsd Current streak: 24 days OFFLINE Fresh Boarder Karma: 0	help. i joined a few months ago, at first was great for me, was clean for a week. then went to visit family abroad, and fell back into it, been like this since, about 6 weeks now, what should i do. where do i start. ok . . . . . im gonna start the 90 days again!
	Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 05 Dec 2011 22:52 #127774

obormottel OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1440 Karma: 6	Welcome BSD, start by opening your own thread and post away. Great tools are available here for those who want them. Hatzlocho.
	Baby steps. If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas! Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans. Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 05 Dec 2011 22:53 #127776

obormottel OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1440 Karma: 6	dov wrote on 05 Dec 2011 00:03: Good morning. Take it easy, amigo. 8) you first. 8)
	Baby steps. If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas! Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans. Last Edit: by .

Re: I'm about to FALL!! 15 Dec 2011 20:32 #128601

Hashem Yaasfeni

Hey neshama,

Do you want to stay together with your guf ? You had better realize that the bottom can be real low and miserable...

Why not do as i did and replace the voices in your head telling you to act out etc and instead download some shmiras eynayim clips and listen to them. I have done that and am feeling strong and powerful and FREE !!! have passed 50 days and have no intention of going back, as long as HKB"H helps me along the way.

I STRONGLY suggest you download some clips and listen on your MP3 player and I am sure it will help you, especially when you may lose focus and become vulnerable. I can say this is one of the most powerful tools to help you mainly i think because we have little urges in the back of our head but when we have the holy and loving voice of Dovy he replaces any thoughts of falling. Just try it for a week and see how that goes and let me know.

GYE has given us many tools to help us out of this mess. WE have no more excuses !!!! Its up to you if you have the will to do it.

You can download the Shmiras eynayim clips here:
guardyoureyes.com/live/component/zoo/item/windows-of-the-soul-group

With love and support,

HY

Last Edit: by .