So I usually post when I fall, now I want to post when I dont.  I was victorious over the yetzer in two ways.  I am really wanting to look at stuff right now, and I realized that if I brought my ipod inside I was going to fall, as thats the only thing I can totally get around the filter and cant figure out how to strengthen it, so I decided to leave it in the car.  It doesnt sound like much, but I knew that gap was enough to keep me off.  Then, in the shower I found myself slipping.  i kept trying to m, and I almost felt like i was raping myself.  then I fell (literally) and as I was lying there I decided I didnt want to do this.  i got up, finished my shower and got out of there.  I didnt do as good as I could have, but I was very close and stopped and I think that is  ahuge accomplishment, because I fell harder than that only days ago.  Thanks for the chizuk!  I feel it has helped.  now i just gotta stay at this step and stop even getting that far. 

WELL DONE!!! I am amazed at the strength that you found within yourself do resist an urge so strong. Do you know that that desire that you felt in the shower in the olam ha-emes was a whole wave of invading tumah trying to remove some kedusha in the world. You quite literally stood up to an entire army and defeated it, with only a tiny sratch to show for it. Typically in war a victory even with great loss is considered a victory. And you Sir just won a battle with barely a scratch. The kedusha that you brought about in your victory is so bright it resembles a supernova explosion. I hope that you can see the brightness and remember that it will always stay with you!

That a boy/man! I heard a class by a certain Rabbi where he says to leave your phone in another room etc. We just have to put as much distance as we can between us and things that make us do stupid stuff, and Hashem will do the rest if you ask him to. So keep on what you doing, and next time the urge comes pray that Hashem takes it away. This website is full of tfilois that are worded very well. Look for mechazek's posts, or Dov's, or alexeliezer's.
Report on more victories soon!

OI! Gevaldik! you are showing him you mean business you are for real about this porn thing.Chazak V ematz

thanks for sharing the goodies!
wishing you continued success

thanks for the support.  I fell...if I can get my ipod secure I'm out of sources, but anything I do to it is to easily undoable. 
i think I may need to admit defeat and do the 12 steps.  is there a phone meeting tonight?

Nu, so you fell. Keep fighting the fight. Space them falls out. Read the Handbook, and follow the first steps. Read chizuk emails every day. On your ipod!
As for the call, here is some info for today:

Elya invites everyone to his weekly phone group tonight at 

9:15 p.m. EST on the topic:



"Relapse Prevention Strategies"




712-429-0690    PIN  225356



Click here for more info on Elya's Call 

bli neder i will be on there.  is this discussion or just lecture?

re:Ipod, if this is the only device where you have unfiltered access maybe you can use an alternate device for whatever you use the Ipod for, i.e. for music you can use an MP3 player, like a Sansa Clip, which holds a lot of songs yet does not have internet access.

While filtering your devices will not remove your addiction, it sure makes it easier to deal with it.

wishing you hatzlocha
zs

interesting idea.  i have an old one that I cant get email on (biggest need of internet) that I can use for music, but I am not dumping the other.  I do use it for other things.  I am also fine with giving someone else the passwords for restrictions but I dont know how to reset the privacy passwords...

strugglingandstrivngBT wrote on 22 Aug 2011 20:05:

Which kind of iPod do you have? I.e 1,2,3 or 4th generation, and which version of iOS do have on it? You can tell the iOS version as you open up the sync tab in iTunes I can help you put restrictions on it so that you still have access to your email and you can access Internet but with a filter. Once I have these details I'll tell you b"n how to do it. If it's easier for you reply to me at nebulamud@gmail.com or add me on google talk with that same address, otherwise just reply here. Believe me together we can do this, and here on this forum we are ALL always together!