Hi all - I've been on the board only since yesterday, and I'm still learning my way around.  I registered for the 90 day board and decided it couldn't hurt to keep an online journal too.  Today is day 3, and reading this board every day is definitely helping me keep my goals and strategies foremost in my mind.

It's good for me to focus attention on hobbies and activities which are healthy for me instead of porn... so I'll update you all on this.  I took a 30 minute walk this morning (have a few pounds to lose like everyone else) and I'm cooking brisket tonight for shabbat dinner tomorrow night.  We don't usually do a shabbat dinner (maybe once in the last 7 years?) but I've been wanting to make brisket so why not.

Today's excitement for me is a new pair of headphones I am testing out - Sony MDR-V6. Right now I'm listening to LCD Soundsystem London Sessions and they sound pretty fantastic.  Not sure if I can adjust to the heavy coiled cable but so far I am leaning towards keeping them.

The rest of the day should be easy for me - I am out in public with my laptop and will be at home with my wife later.  Only risk would be if I go downstairs after she falls asleep, so I will make sure not to do that... and then I will be at day 4 tomorrow!

musicguy wrote on 12 May 2011 23:16:


Fresh or pickled?

I've never heard of pickled brisket before - had to google it.  Is that the same as Corned Beef?

Today was a hard day - thought about looking at porn all day.  Watched a modeling TV show this morning... no nudity, but not good for me.

musicguy wrote on 13 May 2011 21:19:


It's called "corned beef" in the US, and "salt beef" in the UK/Europe.  It can be called both in Israel.  It's often boiled and served on rye bread in traditional Jewish delis.  It also works well for Shabbos meals, because it's durable and hard to get wrong.

Fresh brisket typically works best as a roast, with all its fat kept on (fat side up) and a dash of wine and other vegetables/herbs.  Veal brisket (easily obtained in the US) is the absolute king of these roasts.  Lamb brisket (primarily available in the UK) can take heavier spicing due to the more intense flavor.




Cable?  Option to block it?  Fashion TV is something worth blocking in all frum households with cable/satellite.

the jester you also a clown and also a cook ?

laagvokeles wrote on 16 May 2011 12:30:


Heaven forfend!  Stirring cholent with a plastic flower whilst riding my unicycle , and flipping latkes with the other hand?  A scary thought...

But if someone is engaging in a new hobby as a form of therapy (I use the term loosely), then I am happy to join in!

I'm on day 8 - a full week clean.  I've been here many times before but have always eventually gone back down the slope.  I'm trying to just take one situation and one day at a time and believe in myself. 

Most of my focus now is on trying to stay mindful of my behavior and triggers all the time and anticipate situations where I might start down the slope back to acting out.  Being home alone is particularly difficult for me... yesterday my wife was not coming home until 8:30 PM so I decided to pull out my bike from 10 years ago and go for a ride. I even went out and bought a big wide padded seat and a bike pump. I rode 6 miles and by the end my pelvis was in such pain - I was grunting as I went over every bump in the road!

I have an old mountain bike and after doing some research online, it seems like I need a townie or comfort bike. I may think about getting one - the weather is nice now and the exercise will be especially good for me.

Wife left early for an appt today and I was mindful about what I was doing. Made coffee and watched the Daily Show. One TV promo was triggering for me but I was amazed that I thought "that's triggering for me" instead of "let's get out the laptop and look at porn". I think it's reading this board that is helping.

I'm at work now - alone for the next half hour. Decided to post a journal update to stay mindful - and then get to work on something away from the computer until others come into the office.

I have immense respect for your success, and your ability to recognize and keep away from triggers, and focus healthy activities

Thanks Jester - it's only a week - doesn't feel like much of a success yet.  One day at a time...

musicguy wrote on 17 May 2011 14:45:


Why limit yourself to "one" success?

Each time you recognize and replace, you encounter a whole new success.

That's why so many people get despondent and fail - they failed their "one big one".  Some people argue that this means that there is less incentive, since the "fear of falling" is not as great...  But if you were a Wall St trader making a million-dollar profit three times a day, nobody would suggest that there is no success until after hitting your 90 million target at the end of a month.  Likewise, no trader would give up after a setback or two wiped 5 million off his profits!

Don't underestimate each one of your successes.  No wonder Tzaddikim are jealous...

Edit: In fact, some companies ring a little bell whenever a certain profit is realized - sometimes it dings a few times per day.  Mini-celebrations all around.  If the trader loses 5 million one day, the bell will still ding for each million the next day...

great to see you doing good, MusicGuy!
here's to more smiles, bike rides and coffee

Thank you ZemirosShabbos! 

Musicguy,
When choosing a bicycle, keep in mind that the more upright the posture, the more weight is on your pelvis.  With a road bike (race style handlebars), a considerable amount of weight is on your upper body (arms and hands).  This may take getting used to, but it is more comfortable on the seat.  Next is a mountain bike, then the hybrids, the townies/cruisers.  At the other extreme are recumbents, which are actually quite fast and (muscle) energy efficient.  Padded bike shorts are hugely helpful.

Regarding triggers, I personally can't look at TV altogether.  My mind's just too twisted.  The dolled-up news honey, weather girl, talk show hostess and certainly the babes in the ads would do me in for sure.  It hurts to look at them.

Congrats on setting out on this new path.  Wishing you continued siyata dishmaya.
Alex

Alexeliezer... I am overweight so the weight on my hands is uncomfortable too.  That's why I am considering a townie...  does that not make sense?

The best bike is the one you're gonna ride. It's a personal decision. A local bike shop will let you test ride a variety of bikes.  Take them for a long ride, and take time to make the decision.  Too many people sit on an upright bike in the store and say "this feels comfy."  Two months later it's hanging in the garage collecting dust cause his butt can't take the weight. Thickly padded cycling gloves are essential if you're putting any weight on your hands.  They make a huge difference in comfort  (and are also very protective during the inevitable fall).