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ReJEWvination
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.
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TOPIC: ReJEWvination 1274 Views

ReJEWvination 30 Jul 2009 09:43 #10167

  • Pintele Yid
Heiliga Chabura,

What I am about to write is from Rav Shalom Arush's sefer B'Gan Hachochma from Pages 151-169. It deals with the concept of Hischadshus - starting anew. This is befiting on Tisha Baav - the day that will Bimhaira Biyameinu become a "new" Yom Tov.

He quotes from Rav Nosson from Hilchos Basar Becholov Halacha Daled, as well as Likutai Maharan, Torah Resh Samach Aleph, Torah Samach Beis, and Sichos Haran Ois Vuv.

One of the fundamentals of Breslover Chasidus is Ivdu es Hashem b'simcha - "always be happy", irrespective of your history.

Shlomo Hamelech called the Y"H a Melech Zakain U'ksil. The Zakain part means that the Y"H tries to squeeze out all of our energy, freshness and willingness to fight, by constantly reminding us of our failures. This brings us to Atzvus R"L. And once he dumps us in this black hole, he never lets us crawl out of it - because we don't have the energy and strength of mind to crawl out.

The way to fight this "Ziknah" is based on a Gemorah in Kidushin Daf Mem Tes Amud Bais. The Gemorah says that if a person marries a woman on the condition that he is a Tzaddik, even if he is a Rasha Gamur, the marriage proposal is valid, because perhaps he had thoughts of T'shuva.

Let's think about this. The Gemorah characterizes this person as historically a Rasha Gamur - a totally wicked person. This means that he could have been R"L a murderer, homosexual, rapist, Mechalel Shabbos in public, been m****ting 20 times a day for 20 years... watching P***n non stop etc.... and because he had "thoughts" of doing T'shuva, he is considered a Tzaddik.

Rav Nachman writes that the reason why this marriage proposal is valid is because when one has thoughts of Tshuva, he becomes a totally new person and has nothing to do with the person he/she was before the Tshuva. So this person really is a Tzaddik since he was just born and has no more Aveiros on his Cheshbon.

Rav Nachman writes about himself, that sometimes when he was having battles that he kept on losing, he started anew several times a day!

So the next time the Y"H tells you that you are a "lost cause" and you will never crawl out of the mess you are in, tell him that you don't know what he is talking about. I am not in any hole since I was born today...just 10 seconds ago.  "Ani Hayom Y'laditicha".

He must be talking about someone else - not you.

Mazel Tov on your birth

Pintele Yid

Last Edit: 30 Jul 2009 10:00 by Hims26.

Re: ReJEWvination 31 Jul 2009 12:28 #10263

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Pintele Yid
I thank you for this wonderful yesod.And thank you for pointing out all the powerful thing that you mentioned from the seforim of R. Arush.

I learned alot of his seforim like you did.It is clearly written for our generation and for everyone here.

This insight you said is reflected in the sefer of his called "b'gan hagaguim"

Keep up the good work

we need you here, R Pintele
Last Edit: by test45.

Re: ReJEWvination 03 Aug 2009 08:16 #10479

  • Pintele Yid
It is interesting that Rav Moshe Wolfson on Friday night before Maariv quoted a Chasam Sofer that "Chodesh B'chudsho" is referring to the Chodesh of Av, since before Shabbos Nachamu, the month has the charachteristic of "Aveilus" - mourning, but on Shabbos Nachamu, it has the charachteristic of Nechama "consolation". From Shabbos Nachamu, the month is not called anymore by the name Chodesh Av. Instead the Chasam Sofer gave it another name,  "Chodesh Menachem".

Rav Wolfson then talked about the importance of Haschadshus, renewel. We should forget the destruction that we did to ourselves and now focus on rebuilding, by energizing in davening and learning.



Last Edit: by randy.

Re: ReJEWvination 05 Aug 2009 20:59 #10960

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It just occurred to me, that the destruction and renewal that this month represents, is really the "Alef - Beis" of our journey on this world.

Maybe that is why it is called "AV" - Alef- Beis.  :D
Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest.
Last Edit: 05 Aug 2009 21:09 by Keepfighting120.

Re: ReJEWvination 05 Aug 2009 21:31 #10974

  • Pintele Yid
Great Vort!

In Kabbalah, many time the Bais represents the Sefira of Binah which among other things represents the Olam Hatshuva.

Another thought, the order of Aleph Bais represents growth.

Pintele
Last Edit: 06 Aug 2009 20:17 by GoldstarNGemara.

Re: ReJEWvination 06 Aug 2009 20:31 #11126

  • Pintele Yid
Another day, BS"D another P'shat

The Bais is twice the amount of Aleph. Maybe this alludes to the idea that when one falls (represented by the first part of the month), and then pulls himself up (represented by the 2nd part of the month), not only is he back to where he was before the fall, but he now has the Z'chus of the fall with him ala "Naseh Lo Kizachuyos".

Also, another representation of the Bais is the Y"H. We know that he was created on the 2nd day of creation and that is one of the reasons why it didn't say "Ki Tov" on the 2nd day. This might represent the same idea that when we are renewing in the 2nd part of the month, we are doing it despite our Y'H , thus the Y"H is aiding in our ascent and renewal.

Pintele Yid
Last Edit: by willingtodoit14.

Re: ReJEWvination 07 Aug 2009 16:22 #11220

  • Pintele Yid
Another thought on Av.

Aleph represents trying to solve your issues "alone". This could be because you have a lack of self esteem and you think nobody is interested in your challenges or it could be because of Ga'avah. Either you are smarter than anyone else or nobody can truly understand you or... a million other excuses why you can't reach out to someone else. But most of the excuses of this nature stem from Ga'avah. As the saying goes, "it is lonely at the top".

While the Aleph represents the tragedy and destruction when going it "alone", the Bais represents the "reaching out" to others, letting others into your personal space. Especially utilizing GYE since you are instantly connected to many others who are in the same part of the mountain that you find yourself.

It is Pashut that it also means letting in Hakosh Baruch Hu into your personal space.

Once your space is opened up, you can then ReJEWvinate, which is the message for the second part of the month.

Pintele Yid

Last Edit: by sarak.
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