Heiliga Chabura,
What I am about to write is from Rav Shalom Arush's sefer B'Gan Hachochma from Pages 151-169. It deals with the concept of Hischadshus - starting anew. This is befiting on Tisha Baav - the day that will Bimhaira Biyameinu become a "new" Yom Tov.
He quotes from Rav Nosson from Hilchos Basar Becholov Halacha Daled, as well as Likutai Maharan, Torah Resh Samach Aleph, Torah Samach Beis, and Sichos Haran Ois Vuv.
One of the fundamentals of Breslover Chasidus is Ivdu es Hashem b'simcha - "always be happy", irrespective of your history.
Shlomo Hamelech called the Y"H a Melech Zakain U'ksil. The Zakain part means that the
Y"H tries to squeeze out all of our energy, freshness and willingness to fight, by constantly reminding us of our failures. This brings us to Atzvus R"L. And once he dumps us in this black hole, he never lets us crawl out of it - because we don't have the energy and strength of mind to crawl out.
The way to fight this "Ziknah" is based on a Gemorah in Kidushin Daf Mem Tes Amud Bais. The Gemorah says that if a person marries a woman on the condition that he is a Tzaddik, even if he is a Rasha Gamur, the marriage proposal is valid, because
perhaps he had thoughts of T'shuva.
Let's think about this. The Gemorah characterizes this person as historically a Rasha Gamur - a totally wicked person. This means that he could have been R"L a murderer, homosexual, rapist, Mechalel Shabbos in public, been m****ting 20 times a day for 20 years... watching P***n non stop etc.... and because he had "thoughts" of doing T'shuva, he is considered a Tzaddik. Rav Nachman writes that the reason why this marriage proposal is valid is because when one has thoughts of Tshuva, he becomes a totally new person and has nothing to do with the person he/she was before the Tshuva. So this person really is a Tzaddik since he was just born and has no more Aveiros on his Cheshbon.
Rav Nachman writes about himself, that sometimes when he was having battles that he kept on losing, he started anew several times a day!
So the next time the Y"H tells you that you are a "lost cause" and you will never crawl out of the mess you are in, tell him that you don't know what he is talking about. I am not in any hole since I was born today...just 10 seconds ago. "Ani Hayom Y'laditicha".
He must be talking about someone else - not you.
Mazel Tov on your birth
Pintele Yid