My mind shuts down and theres only one thing is this world:acting out.everything else is tiny in comparison.nothing is enjoyable.nothing is even real.only this. scary right?
SAME THING , uri. It's scary, at that moment I don't want to cont. my struggle cuz I can't imagine going without it.
I know it is not easy, but it is at this point, that the only thing we have left is our Seichal. As Rebbi Nachman says, we are all fighting with the Koach Hadimyon. L"M 25:
The Koach of imagination is the lowest level of the brain. This is the level that the Beheimos have. This is the level that we are strugging with when we can think of nothing else. The only important thing in the world is to act out. Everything else in meaningless. Only the Koach Hadimyon can make you continue to act out, even if you knew you were to lose $10,000. The koach Hadimyon makes you believe that the $10,000 has no importance....even if you are poor.
And Rebbi Nachman says that the only way to beat this b'heimah, is to use your seical. The seichel is very strong, and it comes from the higher level of the brain that the b'heima does not have.
My seichel tells me only one thing....the TRUTH. Yes, I feel that the only thing that has any importance right now is the lust, BUT, my seichel knows 10000% that it is all a lie of the y"h. A lie = "an untruth".
And, it is my seichel, (if I choose to listen to him), that tells me to focus on how I feel, AFTER the acting out has been completed....this is the real TRUTH.
The seicel Rebbi Nachman says is Gadol Meode.
The dimyon, is pure feeling. I FEEL that I absolutely need this.
The Seichel, is pure knowingness, I know that this is BAD, and I do NOT need it.
