WTG!!!!!!

Keep On Trucking!!!!!

And get that filter, a computer without a filter is like a truck without brakes.

Gevura!

Hi Yoni,

Stay strong and keep on trucking!!

The problem is that the trucks in China look like this one, but it only has to last you another 6 weeks, then you can come home and get a real one  ;D ;D .

Gevura!

keep on trucking

yes we can!!

As Bard says FSKOT fell shmell keep on trucking. You are in the right place, we are here for you,before and after, as Gesher said. Good idea to get webcbaver.

  I Fell I fell I fell... I lost control one morning for no reason and since then the last 10 days have been pretty bad. I've been lusting and MZ alot. Then today my wife's brother bought her an ipod touch (with no filter) and she left for the evening.... I looked at p*** for the first time in months and months. I feel like crap, especially since I started teaching and encouraging people in this area. It seems the more I move up in my spirtuall status I fall in the lusting arena. Or maybe I was always like this but now It bothers me more. I feel like a Faker and a fraud. Why bother getting close if i always fall? But the truth is I DONT WANT TO BE LIKe This!! I'm sobbing and tears are rolling down my face bc I want to be close to hashem, I want to be his soldier I want to teach and live the life I know is right, I just keep on failing and failing and I am powerless to stop it. I am so so weak and pathetic.... And funny thing is It is so STUPID it is this little urg (or big urge) to just let out some semen, HEllo! HEres a million bucks or a moment of pleasure that leaves you feeling like a piece of trash, with nothing to show but guilt! How stupid am I to do it!?!  Thats why I feel so bad, I know its not worth it, I know i will regret it in 2 minutes. In fact now that I'm writing this and dont have any urges I feel right now I can Conquer the world I could be Kodosh, and I could stay clean forever. But I know in a few hours or minutes My bomb will start to tick and tick and I only have a few days before it explodes again. Thats whats so depressing. I feel lick it is a never ending battle and I have no Koach anymore, I feel it is almost like wasted effort. Yeah I know every moment is reward and every moment is a battle won, But I want so so much more than that, I don't want to fight this anymore, I just want to to what is right, and it is so easy to do the right thing except when it comes to S** and Lust etc.. I'm going to download webchaver on the ipod right now and I guess we will keep on trucking till the next time...
:'(
Hashem I love you. I want to do the right thing, I feel overwhelmed by this Yetzer Hara. Please Help me.


Thanks for letting me vent guys...

3838

lach lach

or lech licha

whitch means keep on trucking!!!!!!!

next time u see a trigger do some zany thing like figger out how thay got the boat in the bottle

or how they wash the windows of a skyscraper

or how thay take pictures of flying planes

how does a chinese fingertrap work (lulan koishikkl same thing)


keep on trucking!!!!!!!!!!!

Climbing up the GYE membership ladder....

Keep climbing in Avodas Hashem and self-esteem too!
And never quit,  the only way is UP!!!!
Keep On Trucking!!!

Gevura!

how many states is there in your country?
maybe you follow the gye state "forget about my state, just keep on trucking"

Welcome to the forum Mynisayon.

Your nisayon is mine too, our stories are so very similar.

The thoughts you bring out in your second post, and what Dov had to say about it, are very similar to my line of thinking as well. Namely, that the SSA component and the lust component can be two separate issues. In my case, once i resolved to change myself, I was able to stop acting out and I can mostly control my fantasies and get rid of them when they come. I think i have convinced myself that I don't NEED this. But i still WANT it, and when i get triggered by seeing people it hits me hard and and have to fight to pull away every time. So I don't see the SSA going away completely, but if i can get it down to the same level as a normal healthy non-LA person's attraction to women, and not react any more strongly than they would to their "triggers", then i guess I will have to live with that.

And I get that lonely feeling too, of being different and nobody else knows it. and sometimes it's so depressing, and it makes me want to be loved in a way that I cannot get from my wife, and is totally separate from the wonderful relationship i have with her. And I know I can never have it, and that just makes me feel worse....So I throw that on Hashem, and I daven and try to feel that love from Him. And I beg Him to take away the wanting what I can't have, and to be happy with what i do have. And I tell myself that the things i want are not who i really am, they are something outside my true self, that I can give it up and not be empty at the core. I know it, but I need to FEEL it....

Hatzlacha and Keep On Trucking!

Gevura!

Hi Newlife!
Welcome to the hood.
You've taken an important step in admitting you're addicted.
What's your plan?

BTW, I don't buy it that you're "the type that when I fall, I fall hard and for a long time."  Don't doom yourself with such thinking.  You have new tools now, new approaches.  One of them is that if you do slip or fall, lo aleichem, you get right back up as if it never happened and move on.  Learn from your mistakes, your patterns, but keep on moving down the highway (nusach acher: keep on trucking).

Alex

1.  Join the next phone-in session.  I think it starts next week! Monday at 8am or 8:30am, and other times (maybe noon? Dial-In Number: 1-760-569-6000; Participant PIN: 121318 #

2.  I would say if you are going to continue with the shmutz, at least have a reminder to yourself about what's going on.  Get a glass of water, fill it with mud, and put it beside your computer screen.  Just so you don't forget how the impurity fills your pure soul.  :-)  Make it a condition with yourself.

3.  Get a picture of a truck, and keep it on your desk.  If you fall, look at that truck AND KEEP ON TRUCKING!!

Your local chassidishe fellow,

Edge

smile

you are Human

keep on trucking!!!!!!!!

just don't stay down!!!!!!!!!!

bounce right back!!!!!!!!!

Today is exactly 6 months from the day my life changed irrevocably, the day i told my wife everything. It has been a wonderful journey, bumpy at times, but always upward. As hard as it is, I have absolutely no regrets, I know I am finally doing Ratzon Hashem.

It is now 6 months since I have been MZ"L, about 5 months since I last looked at p*** and 100 days since I last m******. I could not have done it without the support and encouragement of all of you, and I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

May we all be Zoche to Keep On Trucking together onward and upward.

Gevura!

FELL SCHMELL brother, you are sober this minute  :D, you walk the path of life this minute, ;D you are my Hero!!!! Keep on trucking 8)!!! All the best to you!!!

GO ChochmasOdom GO chochmasOdom (and the crowd goes) HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CHOCHMASODOM