guardureyes wrote on 21 Mar 2010 18:12:


Don't worry we'll be getting to know that kid in a couple of years when he hits this forum as messed up as anything....

Hashem Yerachem!!!

Reb Eye,

Was reading through these last few posts and my eyes became teary....

So much hardship, yet so much feeling and Sheifa...
You have a beautiful Neshama...

(Sorry for being so emotional... :-[ :-[ I couldn't help it )

Peace and Love holy bro...

Thanks for all your replies.

Yesterday I took my kids out for a walk in the afternoon.  Ended up getting back later than expected.  I called my wife to see how she was doing and if she had tried to call.  "I'm half way home!  I'll be there in 20 minutes"  She came home earlier than expected.  MUCH earlier.  (We thought it would be at least another 2 weeks).

Baruch Hashem.

MIN HAMEITZAR, KARASI KAH, ANEINI B'MERCHAV KAH!!

HODOO LAHASHEM KI TOV, KI L'OLAM CHASDO!!

Now that she's home, change gears, take it more calmly than ever now, and keep on trucking, as they say...

Well, you learned the lessons Hashem wanted you to learn MUCH FASTER than expected  ;D

Make sure to keep them now, tzadik!

Eye.nonymous wrote on 22 Mar 2010 17:18:


Barucy HaShem!

I'm so glad to hear she was able to make it home!

Now you get to know what cheirus feels like!!!

WHAT NOW!

I was wondering.  While my wife was away, I was doing everything.

Now, she's back.  If I don't keep on doing everything, am I being lazy and selfish?  Or am I being crazy?

I was very confused.

So, I just asked my wife.  "What am I supposed to do now?"

She said that she doesn't really WANT me doing the dishes and the laundry and the cooking.  She can do it just fine.  If I help out sometimes, it's appreciated.  But, it's not where I should be putting my energy.

Then, she spelled out the type of help around the house that she would consider helpful.  Things that perhaps I have more of a knack for than she does.

And not to disappear when she needs me most--bed time, etc.

So, that question seems answered.

  --Eye.

That is truly great!!  KOT!!

"...and not to disappear around bedtime" - 

Ouch! Now that's been heard around my household plenty! I commiserate with you, pal, cuz growing up is really tough for me, too!

It's great that you have such good communication with your wife... and even greater that your heart has such good communication with your brain!  :D

guardureyes wrote on 25 Mar 2010 08:32:


Yeah, I think this is a new development.

146.

Eye.

148.  Shavua Tov.

While my wife was away in the hospital with our baby, I had another realization about "Don't talk, don't trust, don't feel."  I think, besides "not feeling," it could also mean that you're feelings become entangled with other people's feelings.  Instead of trusting yourself, you're double-checking or second-guessing what other people think.

I started to notice just how much I defer decisions to my wife.  How long CAN our son play at his friend's house.  CAN our daughter play outside with her friends now.  SHOULD we put the kids to bed now or wait until later.  And other things like this.  I was alone, so I HAD to go with my own instincts.  I AM trying to be responsible, so even if my opinion is different, It's not like I'm doing anything WRONG!  It was a liberating thought.

Shavua Tov,

  --Eye.

I was thinking... it might look like my posts don't really belong on GYE anymore.  I don't often write about having that URGE, or slips, or falls.

I'm not writing much about that wrestling match with my eyeballs while walking down the street or while sitting in front of the computer.

BUT, I would say that my posts DO belong here!  Why?

We turn to our addictive behavior instead of coping with life.

So, I'm writing about how I'm coping with life (hopefully in a healthy way) which is the key to staying clean.

I'm writing about the realizations I'm having that help life's difficulties seem less difficult--which results in less Restlessness Irritability and Discontent--which results in less lusting.

  --Eye.