and Momo will count with you!

sturggle wrote on 31 Jan 2010 11:05:


Dream on...

let's not go there.
i've been having some trouble with dreams lately...

Not much time today... just about enough to update this thread.

Still clean, but, unlike that previous success, last night I had a nocturnal emission (I discovered it when I woke up, but have no memory of it).  So, I know it's not even considered a slip, but it still feels awful.  It feels like the Yeitzer Hara got me anyways.

Besides that, there have been some major misunderstandings between my wife and I.  We've had our plans for a romantic evening postponed already twice (which is part of the reason I feel bad for the emission.  If only things had gone better...)

As the day went on, I thought less and less about it.

I'm not doing too bad now.  Wouldn't mind some chizzuk, though.

--Eye.

Eye.nonymous wrote on 31 Jan 2010 14:12:


Dear Eye,

No, the y"h didn't get you, but he's trying to get you now by making you feel guilty about something that was not in your control.

Wishing you continued Hatzlacha!

Eye,

I second what Kedusha said. The YH is trying to get you now. He can't get you straight on, but he knows how to find his way in.

And I might think about things this way:

I had a nocturnal emission and I feel badly, because I know I don't want to waste.
I want to be close to HKB"H and not do things against His will, even if it might be accidental.
WOW, I really care about my relationship with Him, that's special.

I've been having misunderstandings with my wife. This bothers me.
I want to be close with her. I desire that relationship.
WOW, that's special too.

Chazak chazak venitchazek!

I'd say even more than that - like kedusha said, it's clear that the yetzer hora is trying to get you to feel bad. More than that, though - he's trying to make you feel negative about your relationship with your wife!

Which, of course, tells you that you've been succeeding in both areas, or he wouldn't be trying so hard...

Just keep going.  You have been an ispiration to us all.  As for romatic situation with your wife, we always seem to get postponed also due to kids.  I have tried to keep my mind off the situation and remember to always understand there are G-dly reasons why we don't that evening.  KUTGW!!!

I love this.

"nocturnal emission"

It sounds so important! So...aeronautical! Ha!

"Wet dream" is so burguoise, so 'ghetto', in comparison.

Whenever nervous about said aeronautical event possibly occurring that night, I make sure to smile, take a deep breath, and say to my Best Friend something like, "Elo-h-ai, You helped me before through so many nights that I didn't deserve to get through. Please do it again tonight and help me wake up with at least a little bit of joy and honestly serve You at least a little bit - no matter what happens tonight. I love You so much! Thank You, Hashem".

Then I go to sleep.

It's nice, actually. Try it!
 

EYE!!!!! KEEP ON ROCKIN!!!! AND KEEP ON ROLLIN!!!! YOUR AN "EYE"NSPIRATION TO ALL OF US!!!

Eye, keep on rocking and rolling. Don't let the Y"H get you down. Emissions aren't your fault, unless you stared at things, and rubbed yourself the entire day, building yourself up inside (guys, you know what I mean).

G-d forbid if you fall, it could take you weeks go get back up. I'm living proof. Let that fear keep you going, if that motivates you.

Isn't this day 4 of your second 90-day count?  ;D

---------------------------
Eye, you didn't even slip, but while I'm online, some advice for the masses: Don't let the Y"H trick you into thinking that slips are falls! That will just lead you to doing a real fall. That's what happened to  me.

--------------------------
I wuz here.
--Momo

:-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[

Sorry about a slight oversight...

I would like to say thanks to my 90-day sponsors:

Silentbattle
Kedusha
TrYiNg
Habib
& Cleareyes

Now GYE can hire some new staff members, and we're ready to conquer the world.

Thanks for all the chizzuk.

I started thinking about STEP 1 again, and this helped.

I had a big talk with my wife, which was also very helpful.

Doing better today.

  --Eye.

Great to hear Eye.
Happy for you.

Very happy to hear you are having a better day today!!!  KUTGW!!!