I hate porn but i love it but i hate in deep in my soul my body love it my soul hates it!!!!!!!
im going insane i dont know how to quit even without computer thoughts comes through my head i hate it!!! i wasted seed even if there are no computers women everywhere i go outside and inside im stuck in a place of thoughts of remembering it, i hate porn deeep in my soul and my body love it!! i need to escape this hell!!! now im smoking cigarettes for it i hate life~!!!! i dont know my meaning of life i hate porn!!!!! im going insane of it!!!! i lied to G-d everyday telling Him i quit but i spit on his face on doing it i was crying to Him and then do it again i feel no hope now bc i lied too much to G-d !!!! i dont know if im getting out of this hell "im not even 20 years old yet" i have tried i dont want to go for years of hell of porn iits too much its too much i hate itt! i wonder if you all can understand where i am at... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(

Just keep posting here. Things will get better for you, trust me.

I think I know how you feel.
My mind was full of fantasies and images all day and night.
The first step, which I think you just did, is admit that you are powerless over lust -- an addict. You will then be ready to surrender, truly surrender your lust to Hashem, moment by moment. It's murder in the beginning. Take it one nisayon at a time and stubbornly refuse to do anything but give it up to Hashem.

Just keep at it. Believe you are making progressive progress.
I do- it's the only thing keeping me going.

Even if we do watch porn and masturbate... i hope we get forgiveness and our prayers answered faster from G-d i think he will i feel bad... we all need prayers answered fast... G-d only decides it