Chevra

What an A&W moment it was for me to hop on the call today and sit like a mouse in the background. (I happen to have been sitting on a plane and had to stay muted and just heard the last 15 minutes).

I was in awe of the Group and how the Shipmates were so kind to and open with Eliya and Shimi (thanks so much to both of them!) while they presented their spin on the 4th Step.

I loved hearing the questions and the comments from the Crew.

I still hear one underlying theme in these questions. And that is "how do I deal with the likelihood that I am going to feel down or in a funk while working the Worksheets?"

And I heard Elya's comforting response that "you want to get well and this is part of the process - trust it."  I also heard Uri's sharing his experience with the Power of being vulnerable and putting it all out there.  All this is so true and Great Stuff.

Yes, Chevra, the 4th Step can be a painful process. Have you ever known anyone who has had cancer and asked them why were they willing to go thru ChemoTherapy with all the throwing up, hair loss, burning in their bones, fatigue, etc?

They would tell you that they endured the process because they really didn't have a CHOICE - that there lives were at stake and they looked past the pain to the end result - the healing.

Well guess what my fellow addicts - as we learn in the Big Book - your life is at stake - you have no other choice - and you are Promised Healing on the other side!!

I'd like to offer you another perspective that may give you further reason to JUMP head first into this Step.

Right now, you may be scared and reluctant to do the 4th Step because the only thought you have in your "addict's self-centered" mind about revisiting the past is that it's just going to make you resentful, angry and self centered. And therefore it's going to make you want to act out to soothe yourself.  Me me me again!

Seems logical to me, right?

Well how about instead of taking this "Looking Backward" perspective - why not try Duvid Chaim's "Looking FORWARD" perspective which says "How can I give this exercise MEANING and PURPOSE?!!"

Why not take all the ugliness and resentment of my past and turn it around to Grow, Mature and Heal myself?  No longer does my past have to make me upset, instead I can use it for good.

But - and here's the Kicker - for this approach to work - and just as our Sages have taught us that you can turn an Avaira into a Mitzvah - you have to make this shift with HaKadosh Barachu by your side.

If you're doing this Step just for you, you're fail. If you're doing this for Him, you'll succeed!!  This is where you will find real MEANING and PURPOSE.

BTW, the 4th Step by itself is ineffective. The real break thru and Freedom comes when you're on the 2 hour private 5th Step Call with me, your Sponsor. I promise you that you will "see the Light" then!

Looking FORWARD
Duvid Chaim