I just had a huge moral slip of looking at Apikores sites (not sexual...)

I hope I do not loose my commitment to the major commandments.

The gemara says that the desire for idolatry is no longer with us. I think you can take it.

>> The gemara says that the desire for idolatry is no longer with us.
>> I think you can take it.

I will stay away from that stuff as well as from other stuff.

Yerushalmi Hagigah 2.1 begins with a Misna mentioning a very strong prohibition against investigating the pre-Creation history. Yerushalmi Hagigah 2.1 XII -- XV further states that "It is the glory of G-d to conceal a thing" -- pre-Creation history. How could the rabbis know that the search for that history will give rise to Atheism in the 20th century CE?

That is precisely what weakens our faith and makes every other sin appear "natural".

Thanks Dove for your help
I think i will do this and go when it will be created
I see that with GYE, the Hizouk, i made big progress (truth to my wife, try of real techouva with mouser, stop to see bad girls, filters....); but luxury is here, and when there is a tentation or a problem, I fall; less than before, but i fall.
So if I fall, it means i need a real help.
I will try - no i will do.
Thanks friend
I will tell you my progression i hope
ps: sorry for my english, you know in france they always think all the world peak in french and the others language are bad tought

ploni.almoni@gmx.com wrote:


What do you mean and who r you referring to, chaver?

The Gemarah beautifully tells us that the main reason we Jews served avodah zorah in the days of yore was to allow public sexual perversion and erotica. Certainly letting go of basic faith is a pathway to sexual trouble. Aldous Huxley also wrote that the main reason his fellow atheists despise religion is really just because they fear having any sexual restrictions, at all.

You are so right, chaver R76!

Keep posting here and using your friends. Open up and relax. It's safer than you think!

Courage pinhaswarrior, you are on the right way !

I am in France too, and if this group of 12 steps will be created, it will be a very good thing

Besides, what about the possibility to create a thread where we can talk in french ?

(Continue à progresser pinhaswarrior, Hachem voit tous les efforts que tu fais !)

Dov wrote:


I just didn't understand if SA is entirely new there and he is trying to get it off the ground or if he is trying start an SA group specifically for frum yidden.

This evening I had some thoughts about the magazines I threw away. Should I take Valerian to calm down?

I wouldn't do it. If you are an addict you could switch addictions to tranquilizers.

what do you mean by thoughts? panic? regret?

If so, don't worry about it, I had those when I deleted my stash too, it will pass. After the initial panic and feeling of loss, it passes you'll thank yourself that you did it.

When I deleted my stash I had a weird feeling of bereavement, like I'd lost a friend. Later I was very happy I took the plunge, and now I realise that I didn't lose a friend at all, it was a fraudster who made me think he was my friend while he laughed behind my back at how stupid I was.

It's hard. There's nothing wrong with feeling that.

>> If you are an addict you could switch addictions to tranquilizers.

I do not think I am really an addict.

>> what do you mean by thoughts? panic? regret?

I mean inappropriate thoughts...

For me the main issue is keeping motivated to change.

R76 (boy, i feel weird calling a person a fake name, let alone a number!), when Dr Watson was talking about how you feel, I think his main point was just that if you mean you feel like pulling those magazines back out of the trash, that is not a problem. Feeling the desire is not 'wrong' - it is just the truth. Rather, it is acting on them by doing it, that is 'wrong'.

Desiring is not even a sin in any respect. It is harboring the desire that is a problem of kedusha and can be an issur of Lo Sasuru. Sasuru means to turn after it - not to have the idea or desire.

And when you write 'inappropriate', it makes me want to ask you if you are struggling with struggling? Is that what u r aiming for? Not wanting?

To go from buying nude magazines and masturbating yourself....to not even wanting or desiring them, is quite unrealistic - no, mon frere? Is that what you are doing? Or have I misunderstood you?

Please feel free to explain and set me straight.

This is so precious for me, for I cannot afford to fool myself about what I am working on and what avoda is actually before me.


- Dov

>> Please feel free to explain and set me straight.

Up to Oct 1, '13 I have been acting out about twice a week without realizing that it is a problem. I knew that it is a sin, but I did not know that it is one of the worst sins.

Now I feel a few withdrawal symptoms. I hope I can have enough Emuna and willpower not to fall back.