do you want to fall? really dig deep

if you dont want to fall, quick remove yourself from your environment

i dont really want to but for past few days i have been wanting to and have been fighting it off. but now im ready to give in.. its not about my environment right now

What steps are you taking so far to change your inner environment?

Or are you just "fighting off the yetzer hora"? Holding your breath?

Yair,

if you were in middle of the park with hundreds of people around you, would the temptation to fall be the same?

im not doing anything to change.

to change yourself or your environment?

not changing myself.. Baruch Hashem ive for a lil bit.. but im stuck in my situation right now and cant break through. i need to get over being lazy and just start doing stuff but it seems i lack the motivation. i want to learn more Torah but im just not in the mood u can say.

Shabbat Shalom. Baruch Hashem survived to live another day..

after Shabbas.. Dont know what the future has in stock for me

I survived as well (I'm finishing day 14)

think about what Dov asked you. Are you just holding your breath.

If you don't stay under water, you won't have to hold your breath.

What can you do to change your environment? There has to be something that's in your control that you can do before he YH becomes to unbearable. Stop trying to fight black belt matches. If you don't show up he won't beat you

i need to change my mental environment not my physical environment.. right now whereve i go were having a problem so its all in my head

do you know what your triggers are?

I'm feling really stressed (an old trigger trigger)

Here's a loopy idea, pretend you fell and do whatever you do after falling (mikva, tikunklalli, talk to H' v,oid, v,oid)
and pretend your doing tshuva now with a fresh start.
I always feel it's easier to have clean days early on when yer all riled up against the nastydog Yetser, so instead of falling and THEN getting all nisorer, just pretend you did and get nisorer!
as Mattithias Kohen Gadol said to Judah Makabee and his 4 brothers, Rak Hazak V'Amatz!