I am B"H four days clean. I was in the Beit Midrash today getting ready for mincha by going over morning shiur.  I take notes on my computer.  I was looking for a specific file for chazara and all of a sudden I stumbled upon a cache of nude pictures.  I have never felt this happen, but I mamash as out of breath.  I spent five minutes trying to delete the pictures but my computer was acting up.  Mincha started and I wouldnt let these pictures make me miss mincha with a minyan.  I davened, left the Beit midrash and finally figured out how to get the pictures deleted.  When I did finish, I was panting and out of breath.

I keep thinking to myself that it was such a Miracle that Hashem let me find these in the Beit Midrash rather then letting me find these at home, where who knows what would have happened if I found them there.  I hope it is a good sign that I was truly afraid of the pictures. I have never had that feeling before with this topic so maybe that is a good sign...

Tough nisayon. Well done!
Congrats on getting clean.
Welcome!
Alex

Yishtabach Shmo!

glad it worked out in a good way

welcome to the forum

Keep up the good work!

Your act of deleting those pictures should make you feel good about yourself, and a feeling of being in control over the nisayon. Just make sure to keep up the carefulness with these things because the Y"H can make you feel empowered and then hit you really hard at a moment when you thought you were over it, so stay strong and keep your fences/guard up at all times!

And we're all proud of you!

Have a great day!

Do you think it's bad that תיתוס הרשע brought a zonah into the בית קודשי הקדשים, unraveled a sefer torah and perverted the most קדוש place in the world?  pretty bad, a little improper, impolite, not respectful to the Jewish peoples?????

    Well what hashem was trying to tell you is that what תיטוס did is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING compared to a single time that YOU even think about a zonah.    Because your mind is just as kadosh as the  בית קודשי הקדשים, and when you think about shmutz, or whatch shmutz, you are doing something much worse!!!

that's why he showed it to you in the beis medrash. true there is also kedusha to a beis madrash, and it's a horrible thing to happen there. But the point is to realize that you my dearest freind are greater than just a beis medrash "ועשו לי מקדש ושכנתי בתוכם" You are a living breathing thinking and talking בית המקדש. for you to think, or watch, or talk about such things is even worse.

If you want to fully understand what I am talking about, in addition to the significance of being a beis hamikdash, see nefesh hachayim שער א