Do you struggle with unwanted same-sex attractions? If so, consider joining the weekly SSA conference call!

On Tuesday May 17 from 10:45-11:30 am EST, a new cycle for this conference call will begin, and if you have never joined these calls before, it will be an opportune time to start!

These calls work hard at providing a balanced, clear, and understandable perspective as to what men can do to move beyond their struggle of unwanted same-sex attractions. Some of the discussions include: why we develop sexual attractions all together, how to reduce lust towards men and reach a better sense of peace and wholeness within ourselves, what type of process we can take to ultimately develop attractions for the opposite-sex, and how we can all go on this journey with respect, authenticity, and integrity within Torah and religious values.

You can find all of the call details at this link: https://guardyoureyes.com/component/zoo/item/ssa-conference

May we all have much hatzlacha and bracha moving forward!

Dear G-d,

As I work through my fears, I realize I am thoroughly insane, tossed about by multitudes of negative character traits, trying my best to protect myself and get what I want, according to my mind's instructions.

But I only get panic and chaos. When one characteristic is satisfied, like the need for protection, due to my lack of trust I lose the connection to others.

I have no idea how to find balance and to satisfy my needs.

In turning to You I have the greatest fear of all, as I have no idea how that will help, and it seems at times that it is the craziest, worst possible thing I could do.

However, with the experience of past blessings from You and the terrible consequences of my choices, I have one honest choice and that is step 3 and its prayer.

I am eternally grateful that I have finally begun to comprehend this and found joy.

It is absolutely awesome and mind blowing.

Thank you.

I am referred to on the forum as Yiraishamaim. I am 91 days clean, the second time around. Originally, I joined this forum only after battling this compulsion for years unsuccessfully on my own. It had become abundantly clear that I needed some kind of intervention. So I joined this forum, and from that time onward the journey has been a meaningful and productive one.

The fact that a particular addict arose in a dysfunctional family is played-down a bit in the steps. The steps are focused on accepting the simple truth about me as I am today. Many of us move easily into whining, blaming and self-pity when we focus on our families and their wierdnesses. As I have been taught, looking into my past is typically viewed as only having value in:

1- helping me admit the truth about myself now, and

2- helping me let go of guilt/self-loathing by discovering that many of my painful and destructive emotional and behavioral tendencies were certainly learned. They are not my fault. But I still have them. (I used to hate myself for me).

Suprisingly, this also removed much of the latent resentment I harbored toward my family because:
3- I began to see that their tendencies were most likely also learned or developed out of percieved necessity. It wasn't their fault either! It just was the way it was. Incredible (to me).

For me, at the heart of recovery there lies Hope - a basic spiritual rest for my restless and tatterred heart. And that 'hope' comes from trusting G-d at my core.

I have no idea where I got that from. It seems it is a gift.

I need to have a G-d, rather than just believe in a G-d. To my heart, believing alone is just plain silly.

And as an addict and a Jew, this was my greatest gift, so far.

So, whether you are an addict or not, choose 12-steps or don't, I only wish the same for you.

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.