GYE helps those struggling with inappropriate materials and related behaviors.

All services are anonymous and free! Watch the video below to learn how GYE can help. Trouble viewing? Download here

Phone Number

  • Dial In Number:
    From the USA: (857) 957-1110
    From Israel: 076-599-0060
    For other countries, see link posted below
  • Participant PIN: 746504
  • Conference Call Info

  • Average Call Time: 45 minutes
  • Cycle lasts between: Weekly
  • Most recent cycle began: Saturday, 17 June 2017
  • Day(s) & Time

  • Sunday's 10:45-11:30 am EST (5:45 - 6:30 pm Israel Time)
  • Moderator Info

  • Weekly 45-minute Conference Calls for SSA Strugglers

    Participation is entirely optional and you may remain silent and anonymous for as long as you wish!

    The calls will also focus on answering your questions about SSA. If you have any, before the call please send them (either with your real or anonymous email) to jhoffmancoaching@gmail.com and an effort will be made to address them on the call.

     

    Relevant Links, Resources and Downloads

    Comments (7)

    • Getting better
      Getting better says:
      09 August 2016 at 21:35 |

      How do u get the old conferences is there a way to listen to them

      • obormottel
        obormottel says:
        07 March 2017 at 06:55 |

        Contact the moderator, Jonathan (his email is posted above). He does not make the recordings public but might release to a safe individual for private use.

    • LifeIsAStruggle
      LifeIsAStruggle says:
      29 January 2017 at 18:57 |

      Hi. I'm new to the forum. I struggle with same sex attractions not having been able to come to terms with my feelings untill a couple of years into my marriage. It could be really realy hellish at times. Suicidal thoughts etc... Any insights of any sort?. The isolation is so severe. Anyone have any thoughts about SSA and masterbation? I found that the inability to talk and come to terms with these feelings, causes me to release my sexual frustration, almost as a form of rebellion against Hashem Csvs"h, or at least against those in my sheltered comunity who calim to represe his will if that makes sense. I'd love to hear more from other frum SSA struggler and if anyone else can relate to my situation.
      Thanks.

      • obormottel
        obormottel says:
        27 February 2017 at 08:08 |
      • Tateh_Beygel
        Tateh_Beygel says:
        06 March 2017 at 03:40 |

        I can relate to your struggle. I developed a masturbation habit at an early age, and it turned into a serious addiction when the internet came around. I am coming from a non-frum background, and now working to be more and more frum, but I find it a struggle as I am not married. I had been in the "gay lifestyle", and was even in a domestic partnership, but once I got convinced that homosexual acts were wrong and that being in a gay relationship was living in an illusion, I can't really submit myself to it for long.

        • LifeIsAStruggle
          LifeIsAStruggle says:
          14 March 2017 at 01:41 |

          Thanks for replying. I'm wondering if anyone has any further insights how to reconcile the anger towards Hashem for instilling such confusion with our belief in an all loving G d??

          • Shivisi24/7
            Shivisi24/7 says:
            30 October 2017 at 16:07 |

            Hi, I am coming in new now so I'm just seeing your old post. If you still are open for some thoughts I'll share some of mine.
            I think I understand what you are saying, I've been there too. I have been struggling since before my bar mitzvah and have experienced the struggle in different ways over the years of my journey. I find my anger seems to come out when seeing other younger guys (I'm kind of stuck as an older bachur in yeshivah becuase of the ssa) succeeding in their lives. They seem happy, carefree, and eventually get engaged and married while I'm stuck dealing with the same stuff I was feeling in 6th grade. That really can be hell!
            I don't have solid suggestions for dissolving the anger partly because I'm not convinced that is what Hashem really wants/expects from us. "Lo nitna torah l'malachey hashareis"! Hashem who gave the struggle understands it and doesn't expect us to pretend it isn't a struggle. The pain might serve some greater purpose which we can't understand, but this knowledge doesn't mean it's not painful. A gadol in E"Y told me that I should view myself as an elite soldier handpicked for a difficult mission. My understanding of that is to acknowledging the pain and difficulty but realize the incredible nachas ruach that my struggle provides Hashem.
            There are some ways that sometimes minimize the pain/anger I feel. I have found that when I compare myself to others I feel worse and anger arises at my situation, myself, and eventually Hashem. Therefore, to the extent that I can limit comparing my life with others' I can stay more positive.
            Also, for me understanding the pattern of developing ssa helped a lot. I could see myself as broken rather than sick or crazy, and I continue to attempt to learn about my real needs from the ssa. It might leave me with anger about the situations I faced that led to ssa, but not the same feeling of a cruel G-d randomly picking me to suffer or whatever I thought beforehand.
            One last thought that is kind of out there, I'm still not sure if I really understand it. I know that my feeling of connection to Hashem has been strongest in some of the worst times and weaker when things are going ok. Now, it's hard to measure from our own feelings of "spirituality" which aren't necessarily authentic representations of where we are holding in ruchnius in Hashem's eyes. (Women of the wall, christians, and a bunch of other people all feel "spiritually" uplifted from whatever baloney they are doing.) However, I davened the most when I felt that there was nothing else to do because I hit rock bottom. And now that I'm b"H generally doing better I actually miss being able to cry when I'm davening. I don't know what would be if I didn't have ssa but it might be that through this I was ale to have a very personal relationship with Hashem that I might have missed otherwise. I want to think about this a little more, it's similar to the idea of Hashem making the avos and imahos not have kids to have them daven, or how E"Y needs water to keep a relationship with Hashem through tefilah as opposed to mitzrayim with the nile, and same idea with the snake always having dust as food available so no connection to Hashem.
            Anyways, hope my non-answer is somewhat helpful. All the best in the continued journey!
            Hazthlacha!

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