Addiction is the condition that tells the sufferer that they do not have it.  The denial that develops can easily convince the individual, their spouse or their children, among others, that they are the one(s) with the problem, and the alleged addict is really doing fine.

As such, it is important for the treating professional to assess the condition, and to carefully present any evidence of an addiction problem to those affected.  It is often a slow process, because we must meet the addict or the family member where they are, and still focus on a condition that can have lasting effects on entire family systems.

My personal model is to reflect back to the individual what I have seen or understood from meeting with them.  If I have permission, I will sometimes use collateral information provided by a loved one.  If I sense resistance, which is common, I use therapeutic techniques to encourage a non-confrontational relationship between us. 

Once we have established a bond, I typically use a cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) model as a way to diffuse denial and defensiveness, and to help move them toward recovery.  Upon achieving stability, we work on strengthening support, accountability, and overall recovery tools, and also develop relapse prevention strategies.

A family systems approach is necessary, because addiction can inflict significant collateral damage, and prevention or repair of this damage is crucial.

Frum individuals often receive mixed messages: "get help but don't be public about it." "Don't make us look bad." "Control yourself - you're frum." "Jews don't have addiction problems."  "You can't go to meetings." And so it goes.  The different addictions have more in common than they have differences.  If addiction is not assessed and treated, it will get worse. 

That does not have to happen.  There is help available.