Let Him open the door
 
 
  Breaking Free Chizuk#1441  
 
 
In Today's Issue
   
Image of the Day: For spouses... and all others
Member's Chizuk: How Everything in our lives can help us stay sober.
Sayings: Let Him get the door!
Daily Dose of Dov: Hashem is With Us
Prevention: 25 Steps to Beating Porn Addiction
 
 
90 Day Journey
 
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Image of the Day
 
For spouses... and all others
 
For spouses... and all others
Member's Chizuk
 
How Everything in our lives can help us stay sober.
 
By Hillel Hazukyn

I used to think that all the musar (working on self character..), Torah, tefillah, chesed etc,...were all something I had to do as part of being a frum Jew, as part of my essence, who I really was / wanted to be.

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Sayings
 
Hello Fear. I hear ya knocking. LOUDLY. I think I better let my Higher Power answer the door today.
 
Daily Dose of Dov
 
Hashem is With Us
 
By Dov

Chuck C. once said: "What you are looking for, you're looking with; and what you found, came here with you."

We've all got Hashem with us, period.

When Hashem told the Avos not to fear, "for I am with you," He was not informing them of anything. They always knew he was with them. Rather, Hashem was speaking it out to them to make the relationship work for them. Just like a nisayon: Hashem "tests" us just to bring out the greatness that is already within us. Hashem was letting them actually hear His love and attachment to them, even though it was already there, to make it the kind of awareness that works.

Plenty of us have faith in G-d. But that is not enough for addicts. We need a faith that works. And that usually seems to take time, work, pain, and patience. (Unless you've got nevu'ah... but it seems that getting nevu'ah requires those things, too. Darn).

Prevention
 
 
25 Steps to Beating Porn Addiction
 
  • Rebooting Your Brain Will Change The Way You Think, Forever

  • Rebooting your system is a theory based on the idea that watching porn changes the chemical structure of the brain and makes viewers addicted. Forcing yourself to stop watching it allows the brain to reset and will help free yourself from its addictive power.

    What’s the science behind this?

    Neuroscientists have now found that the brain is not hardwired from birth, but “neuroplastic”. As Norman Doidge, psychiatrist and author of The Brain That Changes Itself says: “not only can it change, but that it works by changing its structure in response to repeated mental experience”.

    This change is most apparent in the reward centre of the brain, where a ‘feel-good’ hormone called dopamine is released every time we achieve something. Watching porn results in an excessive release of dopamine, which damages the neural pathways, establishing a compulsive behaviour pattern.

    The impact of porn addiction is similar to the effects that other drug and behavioral addictions have on the brain.

    A recent study at Cambridge University found that pornography users are fuelled by a need rather than because they get pleasure from it. Read more about it at the Your Brain on Porn website.

    The SubReddit NoFap, an online support group and resource, and the Your Brain on Porn website recommend a period of abstinence which helps reset the reward centre in the brain. NoFap recommends a 90-day break from porn and masturbating. [Compare to GYE's 90-day challenge]. A thrill from being disciplined replaces the thrill of porngraphic images.

    You could also try the Sexual Reboot program. It comes highly recommended. It is an online course that helps men beat their porn addiction. You are supported throughout and it has good rates of success. Click Here!

    You’d try out a girl and get a perfect image of what you’ve watched on the internet … you’d want her to be exactly like the one you saw on the internet … it’s ruined the whole sense of love. It hurts me because I find now it’s so hard for me to actually find a connection to a girl.

     

    Do you think you may have a porn addiction?
     

    Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

    Porn Anonymous (PA)
    If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

    Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
    If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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