The sight of your eyes
In Koheles, Chapter 11:9 it says: "Rejoice, Young man in your youth, and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth, and walk in the ways of your heart, and in THE SIGHT OF YOUR EYES, but know that for all these things Hashem will bring you to judgment".
Part of me says "I can't stand it anymore, I have to act out" or "If I only can do it one more time, that will save me". "Look one more time". "Go to that place one more time". That is my addiction talking. How do I overcome this? I ask myself, "Do I really want to go back to secretly sneaking around, lying to my family, covering myself up so no one will see me? Do I really want to go through this pain of withdrawal all over again." NOOOOOO!!!!!!
But once a person lets their guard down, stops talking to friends, stops going to meetings, stops reading, it's easy to rationalize and say, "I can do this on my own". And then we fall.
What's the answer? Koheles gives it to us in THE VERY NEXT POSUK. Listen carefully.
Chapter 11:10: "Therefore, remove anger (resentment, fear) from your heart, and put away evil from your flesh, for childhood and youth are vanity". HEVEL!
This is the answer guys. "Remove resentment, fear and anger from your heart". For many people, resentment is the #1 cause of falling. Think about it. Do you ever act out when you felt on top of the world, that the world was yours and everything was going great. You had no worries? I doubt it. If you have, I'd like to hear your story.
We're not talking about emotional, physical, or sexual abuse here. Such people need PROFESSIONAL HELP. We're talking about everyday annoyances that we blow up way out of proportion and they affect us.
See this 4 Step Exercise from Elya, to help you remove anger and resentment from your heart.