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Regaining our Sanity

GYE Corp. Wednesday, 21 March 2012

Once we stop acting out, we embark on a journey of recovery. "Recovery"? from what are we recovering? We are getting our Sanity back! (we probably did have it when we were five or six years old...). After all, it is insane (see Websters, really) to be doing all kinds of things that we really know are destroying us, our families, etc.

I didn't feel insane, per se, when I came to SA, though I was very frustrated with my weakness and apparent stupidity. But over the first year and a half I recognized it: "Uh oh, Sanity! I guess I really was nuts before, cuz I didn't have this!

I assume, like me, you have not come this far (posting and asking for help on a forum for men with por-n problems!) just because you are just "sick and tired" of disappointment with yourself, or even because it's so upsetting to be doing aveiros. Don't get me wrong, I am not a fan of aveiros! But, as I have posted about before, trying to finally stop doing these terrible aveiros never got me into recovery. Well, let's say it never kept me there. Trying to stop dying, on the other hand, did wonders. I presume you feel clear that in some respect, this lust problem is killing you and that is why you are going this far to get help. If so, Sanity is definitely for you, and you have come to the right place to start getting it back! :-)

So, here it is. After we stop acting out, with Hashem's help, the program is here to help us change into the kind of people who do not need to go back to acting out. Basically, that means "getting a life" and learning what to do so that you can stay in it, for a change.

Lust "opportunities" (including sights, sounds, ideas, memories, people, whatever triggers us) can distract us from our lives. It's not really about acting out any more, it's about reality. It's about staying alive. That's it in a nutshell: we can't afford to get distracted from our real lives, at all.

Even though the steps talk a lot about G-d, the program is not religious: it ends with you getting your freedom back. You are now awake! Now it is up to the individual to determine how he knows what G-d wants him to do, and that is where religion (may) start. And B"H we have a Torah that is true, that we love, and we believe Hashem helps us live it!

 

If you feel I am "pushing too hard", please consider that I'm not telling you what to do at all, just sharing what worked for me. That is what loving someone is about, no?

Hatzlocho brother!