Cling to Hashem
I want to share with you a beautiful excerpt from an eye-opening article that someone shared with me recently about the different type of 12-Step groups that exist today:
What the original AAs were shooting for - and what they aimed their program at - was not mere sobriety. That would have been the "common-sense" approach, the way of worldly wisdom, the reasonable-level-of-aspiration gambit. But the founders of AA were men moved by inspiration. They were coming at the problem with the uncommon sense of men under guidance.
The common-sense approach had already been tried and it had failed. If you set a drunk's level of aspiration at mere abstinence - "'Why don't you be a good fellow, use your will power; and give the stuff up" - it did not work. The poor candidate for reform was back drinking again in short order. The discovery that launched AA in the first place was that if an alcoholic were somehow to be rocketed into a state way beyond abstinence, if he were to achieve a real spiritual conversion, an utterly new relationship with God, then permanent abstinence would automatically occur as a blessed and life-saving by-product. That was how it happened with Bill. That was how it happened with Dr. Bob. That was how it happened with most of the first hundred members.
For the full article see here.
And "Be-holy" posted something along similar lines on the forum yesterday (edited for clarity):
B"H I am still holding strong and I hope everyone is gaining on their mission to be free. Things have been up and down recently. It's getting easier, but I still feel the y"h turning inside of me. Be that as it may, I sometimes get down when this happens. But yesterday it occurred to me; that contradiction within us is the sand that grinds away at the clam, producing a beautiful pearl. In other words, if we never felt down and were ALWAYS up, we would never really be pushed to grow. Therefore, those feelings shouldn't let us get down but rather make us aware of our present state, and show us on which areas we need to continue to work.
I truly believe with all my heart, that the only way we will ultimately remain happy when all is said and done, is to fill that void constantly with ahavas Hashem (love of G-d) and avodas Hashem (service of G-d) every moment of the day. The only way we will feel good in the long term, is not just from the sur m'rah (staying away from bad) - because that will wear off in time, but rather by aseh tov (doing good) by making every moment of our lives a connection to Hashem, every seder and every davening, and by maintaining a constant awareness that we can - and are - in service of G-d 24/7, be it on the street or in the house, etc...
Some may think that this is way beyond us, but think of it this way; Didn't our addiction cause us to always be on the lookout 24/7 for that girl on the street or more of that filth on the internet? This addiction was also a constant awareness, so now we can turn it on its head and use this "constant awareness" for the good!
We are fighting the Yetzer Hara who is a mighty warrior. He has the arsenal of knowing our nature better than we know ourselves! The only advice is to cling to Hashem, pour our hearts our to him and constantly find new ways to bring our divine service to greater heights. This is the only true, time tested answer to all of our problems.
With all my prayers and admiration to my fellow warriors, may tomorrow shine a new light on tzion and all of our souls yearning to "be holy".