Thursday, 09 February 2012

The Pain of Living

by Dov (See all authors)

The first step to recovery is to stop using your drug and to do whatever you need to do to stay clean. Then, as the pain of living happens, have the help you need to live through it usefully. And that pain will come, for the stuff that drives us crazy in life (about ourselves, others and their behavior) is what drove/drives us to act out in the first place. But we will certainly not face it sanely while we are drugging with porn, masturbation, sex, etc.

Now, I tried this many times over many long, hard, rotten years. After all, we really are good people, yir'ei Shomayim, and we do try to stop. But I could not do it successfully until I finally gave up on the luxuries of secrecy - and even normalcy - by joining other sick folks like me who are getting better (in my case, SA) and admitting that I was actually ill.

If we start on this road and stay the course one day at a time, we are forced to work (use) the 12-steps in order to face life and are automatically, shockingly healed - even without knowing or understanding what we are doing. And it's better that way, 'cuz, as they say, "my own best thinking is exactly what got me into this mess in the first place". Leave me out of my recovery as much as possible, thank-you.