How to Achieve a Paradigm Shift
  Breaking Free Chizuk #1260  
In Today's Issue
Image of the Day: Take a chance at a fulfilling life.
12 Step Attitude: Don't Be an Angel
Announcements: Nesivos Shalom Conference Call
Daily Dose of Dov: What to do when feeling lust
Announcements: The Chosson Shmooze - Full Archives
Testimonials: Picking myself up with a smile
Announcements: Free Hard Copy of GYE Handbook
90 Day Journey
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Image of the Day
Take a chance at a fulfilling life.
Take a chance at a fulfilling life.
12 Step Attitude
Don't Be an Angel

There are different ways that parents praise their children when they are being really good.

One compliment I often hear parents give is: "you are such an angel."

We use this form of praise because in our minds we have an image of angels as perfect holy beings that never do anything wrong.

However, while it is true that angels are very special beings, calling someone an angel is not such a compliment.

We are taught that despite the fact that angels are holy and pure they are stationary beings.

They never grow, never improve and never change. Each angel is created with a specific spiritual mission, which it constantly maintains without ever improving or failing.

There are angels that serve G-d with love and those that serve Him with awe.

Whatever spiritual personality they are given is the one they will always have, without making it better or worse.

People are not angels.

We are not always perfect.

We make mistakes, do what we shouldn't and sometimes fail in our mission.

But the unpredictability and inconsistency of our personality is also our strength.

It means that we never have to stay the same.

Just like we can fail, we can also change and improve.

Just as we can do that we shouldn't, we can also do more good than we originally expected.

We are the only beings that are not limited by our natural instincts or personality. Our potential for growth, improvement and change is endless.

Don't expect your children or others to be angels.

We should hope for them to be real humans - people who sometimes make mistakes, but who can always bounce back and become stronger than ever before.

Don't be an angel - be a mentsch.*




n. pl. mensch·es or mensch·en (mĕn′shən) Informal

A person of integrity and honor.

[Yiddish, human being, mensch, from Middle High German, human being,

Nesivos Shalom Conference Call

Reb Noach Schwartz, LCSW will give a shiur in Nesivos Shalom specially geared to GYE members, followed by insights, sharing and Q&A.

Kindly call in for an enjoyable, educational, and chasidishe schmooze!

SUNDAY Mornings from 9AM to 9:30AM EST

Call-in Information.

Daily Dose of Dov
What to do when feeling lust
By Dov

When my house is on fire with lust, and my body is telling me "I need it, I need it," and it feels clear that it is in my absolute best interest to do this crazy thing, I need to remind myself that it is a 100%, total, lie. But that is not enough. I must also have a truth to replace it with! And that truth is; Hashem loves me, He has nothing better for me than what He is giving me right now, this moment is precious, etc...

B"H, hearing and seeing other guys in person, and sharing their experiences in doing this very thing, was - and is, very important to me. "We are only as sick as our secrets" is a big motto in 12-step circles. When we get the insides OUT, we are grabbing hold of a long term solution.

The Chosson Shmooze - Full Archives

Congratulations and thank you to Rabbi Feuerman, LCSW-R for completing the cycle of the Friday shiurim

"The Chosson Shmooze You WISH You Had, but Never Got!"

Note: This live shiurim series is over.

The entire series of this sensitive but important series for married men is available for listening and downloading here.

A Zip file of the entire series can be downloaded here.

Disclaimer: This shiur series is meant for married men only.

To listen to the shiurim by phone:


PIN: 637207#

Reference numbers: 87-97, 102, 107, 112-115

Rabbi Feuerman's Parsha shiurim are available here.

Picking myself up with a smile
By Aaron

I"ve been receiving your emails for a good couple of months now, and I thank Hashem for them. It gives me great chizuk in my times of need. I notice from time to time how my demeanor has changed changed for the better. For example, I live a very hectic life with KE"H a decent size family. Some of the children are diagnosed with ADHD/ADD and keep us on our toes. Many a times, it gets to a breaking point from all the tension. I start feeling sorry for myself, and get depressed. Once depressed, it's downhill from there. Lately, I stop myself and think. What does Hashem want from me? What will I accomplish by getting depressed? He gave me so much! I start thinking, what have I read in the GYE emails I receive, how people, just like me, get tested and pass with flying colors! I want to be just like them. So, I pick myself up and continue with a smile (most of the time).

Read more
Free Hard Copy of GYE Handbook

Prefer a Hard Copy of the GYE Handbook?

You can now

order your copy here

For questions and comments, please contact

We are looking for donations to help with the printing and distribution of free handbooks for those who need. If you can help, please donate here and specify in the note that you are donating for the free handbooks. Tizke Lemitzvos!

For those of you who have been too afraid to order your FREE copy of the GYE Handbook, I wanted to show you exactly how we send it out.

Often we see notes to the sender which indicate people are very worried about others finding out what’s inside.

(B”H, we should all have that SAME FEAR before Hashem when the Yetzer Hara tempts us!)

The photo is exactly how the package is sent out, in a tamper-proof plain white envelope, with nothing to indicate it came from GYE.

Your address and my address are on the envelope, and that’s it!

ORDER TODAY and start your next steps to kedusha!


Do you think you may have a porn addiction?

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit (Hebrew: / Yiddish:

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit

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