For the past, let's say, a week and a half - maybe longer - I haven't been myself. Instead of my positive, cheery, optimistic, loving self, I've had these feelings inside of self-hate, harshness, and withdrawal from life…

What I'm feeling hurts. It's suffering. But I know that it will not last forever. Emotions come and go, like clouds, like angry express trains, or like strong waves. But they pass. They will not last forever, and they are not impossible to bear. Yes, they are hard. Yes, they don't feel good. But I can handle experiencing uncomfortable emotions and ride them out until they go away. I can remind myself that suffering is part of life, and that all human beings suffer. I try to keep myself involved in and focused on action, and in doing things that give me pleasure. I try to be grateful for every breath I take. I can enjoy the special gifts that Hashem has given me: the ability to see beautiful and vivid colors; the ability to touch, to feel soft things and different textures; to experience a hug; the ability to taste so many different foods; the ability to sing, and hear the voices of my family. There is so much.

There is so much to be grateful for.

‘Human decency precedes religion’ (Leviticus Raba 9:3) A person cannot consider ‘serving God’ if he is not a decent human being in the first place. A criminal cannot become religious to plaster over his past behaviour. Firstly, he must put his past behind him with genuine contrition, then he can consider where his future lies. Bad character, mixed with religion, is the perfect combination that all terror groups seek……and find in abundance.

Dear Distraught,

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.