Zos Chanukah
  Breaking Free Chizuk #1599  
In Today's Issue
Editor’s Note: Self-Pity
Torah: Scabs and Shmiras Einayim
Torah: Zos Chanukah & King Menashe
Chizuk: A Poem from the Depth
Torah: The ultimate light
Announcements: GYE's New Video Site
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Editor’s Note

A GYE member, Yedidia Aleph, is checking in:

"BH, I took advantage of the last day of Chanukka for extra davening, including the tefiloh found in the Yesod Ha Tshuva, saying Parshas HaMon and Igeres HaRamban (segulos for yeshuos). Then, I had the strength to  make a phone call to reach out for help with my overwhelming unpaid bills (very big source of stress for me). Now I feel a little more hopeful that we can move forward.

What I realized was that part of the pain I was feeling was due to self-pity!"

Dear Yedidia,

thanks for keeping us posted!

Alcoholics say about self-pity: "Poor me, poor me, pour me another drink!" While the pun does not work so well for sex addiction, the lesson is clear: self-pity leads to self-destruction.

Stay well and sober!


Scabs and Shmiras Einayim
One small kabala for "Zos Chanuka"
By Yaakov from GYE

It says in the Sefarim that Zos Chanukah is the G'mar - the sealing of the judgement and the last chance for those who still haven't been able to do Teshuvah since Rosh Hashana...

I wanted to share something from personal experience. For years, I had difficulty to avoid peeling scabs on Shabbos, even though it is prohibited. No matter how many times I tried to stop, I kept finding myself touching scabs on my face or head, and once I started touching them with my fingernails, it was impossible to resist scraping them off. One day, a tragedy occurred in my community and everyone was asked to strengthen themselves in one area. I made a shvuah that for a half a year I would not let my fingernails touch my head on Shabbos, unless I needed to scratch an itch. I found that this really worked. As long as I didn't start touching the scabs with my fingernails, it was not even a test!

I think we can apply the same to Shmiras Einayim. So many of us keep trying and falling in this area. We make kabalos and keep starting over, but we somehow never seem to be able to hold it for long. But what if we could somehow AVOID the nisayon in some small way, like not "touching" the scabs in the example above?

Let us try to make one small Kabala on this special day of Zos Chanukah, that for one month we will try our very best not to look outside of our 4-Amos when walking in the street. You see, as long as we are used to looking all around, it is like touching the scabs. It becomes almost impossible to resist gazing at things we shouldn't. But if we manage to "stay out of the boxing rink" and keep our eyes down whenever we are outside, the nisayon becomes SO MUCH easier to deal with!

It is true that this Kabala won't help for everything. It won't work for when we are on the computer, and it is also hard to implement when we are driving behind the wheel in our cars and are forced to keep our eyes up on the road. But let us start at least with this one small - but powerful - Kabala, that as long as we are WALKING outside we will keep our eyes down within our own 4 cubits and focus on just getting done whatever it is that we set out to do, and avoid being "tourists".

From experience, this plan works wonders. As long as our eyes aren't darting everywhere it becomes so much easier to succeed in Shmiras Einayim on the street! What once seemed impossible is now within reach.

May we all succeed in doing real Teshuva and giving our hearts to Hashem on this special day.

Zos Chanukah & King Menashe

Many Sefarim bring down that the final judgement that began on Rosh Hashana can still be reversed until Zos Chanukah. One of the Karliner Rebbes once said that "the shmattes can shelp their Teshuvah until Zos Chanukah". We're all shmattes, and we can all grab ahold of this last opportunity for the Teshuvah that we began on Rosh Hashana.

Read more
A Poem from the Depth
The ultimate light
GYE's New Video Site

Announcing the launch of GYE's new Video website gye.vids.io


The site currently has over 200 videos in over 30 categories such as:

 GuardYourEyes Videos  

 Stop Me from Falling  

 Understanding Addiction  

 Getting back up after a fall  

 Technology Dependence  

 Inspiration for Women  

 Inspirational Videos  

 Dealing with SSA  

 Overcoming Challenges  

 Improving Marriage  

 The Power of Giving  

 Lobbying for Cleaner Internet  

 Attitude of Gratitude  

 Parenting Software  

 Parenting Videos  

 Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski  

 Strengthen your Emunah  

 Rabbi Bentzion Shafier  

 Dealing with Depression  

 Using Technology Safely  

We hope these videos can inspire many people for years to come.

Note: The videos are not hosted on problematic websites like Youtube or Vimeo, but rather on a Kosher video hosting site called sproutvideo.com. Ask your filter company to open the site for you.

We would like to expand our selection of videos with time. Please help and send any good inspirational videos you may have to us via dropbox or google drive to eyes.guard@gmail.com. Keep in mind: the videos need to be 100% clean and somehow related to our struggle with lust. If the video can inspire us in any one of the categories above, it could be useful to our members.

Thank you!

Do you think you may have a porn addiction?

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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