Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Tamu U're'u Ki Tov Hashem

Jack, an old time member of GYE (see his time-line to 90 days here) posted today on the forum:

by Jack (See all authors)

Hello all, it's been a long time. I just want to share some more ideas with all of you.

In my battle with this, I realized there was a void in me. When I gave up lust it felt like I had given up my 'best friend'. Rabbi Twerski told me to fill that void with Torah (see this page and this page). But the two are not the same. How do I get the Torah to fill that void? How do I get the Torah to give me pleasure? Well, it's not easy, but we have to try our best to fulfill the pasuk "Tamu u're'u Ki Tov Hashem"... Here is what I came up with:

1) The pleasure of Torah has to be visceral - you have to feel it in your gut. It's not enough to feel it in the intellect. It has to replace something physical. We must use our physical senses to appreciate the world of Hashem. How to do that? Well, spring is coming - BREATHE in the spring air. LISTEN to the birds chirping - they are doing what Hashem created them to do. Read perek shira - SEE how all the animals are doing exactly what they were commanded to do. TOUCH an orange, FEEL an apple, how beautiful! What a beautiful world Hashem made for us to enjoy! EAT the matza, feel the bondage/freedom that was the mitzrayim experience. And remember - only G-d is perfect. If we make a mistake, get up.

2) Learn up a good Sugya with Tosfos - there is no pleasure that matches this. Go as deep as you are able, and in as much detail as possible. Go slow, take in every detail. Make it physical, learn with a smile on your face!

I wish myself chizuk in these areas.

I love you all,

Jack.