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Re: Kosher Videogames 03 Aug 2022 21:13 #384333

I am not at all an expert on the subject of what would make a game kosher. Generally at this point in my life I avoid video games (still do board games when it fits the circumstances) as I don't want to be increasing my time with technology in that sort of way which can, for me, become compulsive on its own. That being said, everyone's path is unique. Its difficult for me to suggest because even in games that are very simple and not consciously trying to arouse urges, they can contain things like immodestly dressed characters-- and since I don't want to look up which levels to avoid so as to not possibly stumble upon these things myself its hard for me to make a recommendation even as someone who has played many games in my life. I can say that as a general rule, board games and card games are much easier to ensure the permissibility of than video games. This is to the credit of the medium of video games, as it shows their complexity and ingenuity that one cannot fully know what may be kosher about modern games in detail without playing them or analyzing them (or maybe a game hechsher in the future!) . Many modern board games are quite complex and engaging and have enjoyable mechanics, and still some of the popular ones have PC adaptations. These may be a great way to engage with friends from a distance while discussing kosher subjects! Just be wary that just because they are easier to ensure the permissibility of does not mean that they are ensured to be permissible of course. We have to choose where we feel we are able to engage in the world so I leave it up to you to navigate that. I know this did not directly answer your question but I hope I at least provided some insight and offered options.
Last Edit: 03 Aug 2022 21:15 by wellmadecolors. Reason: addition
  • yechielmichel
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Striving to be good wrote on 03 Aug 2022 18:40:

yechielmichel wrote:
I hate to pour cold water on this, but it sounds like your setting yourself up for disappointment. Almost none of these things are guaranteed.



If you hate to pour cold water, then don't do it. PERIOD.

Yes, you're right, Success comes from Hashem. Reward for doing good is not immediate...

BUT, to explain to myself, It was all written based on my experience. I had LONG streaks in the past, and these were the results I have gotten in my clean days.

I became successful, I doubled my income in one year, and I was already making six figures BH.

I was much happier since my eyes were not lusting all day.

I loved my wife much more; I was not looking on the streets for others... Yes, the grass is always greener on the other side....

I didn’t read your post history before I posted. I wanted to step in just because to me it looked like someone really just setting himself up for disappointment.

looking at your post history, I see that your prefer a certain style of positive posting. It not my style personally so I different things work for us and that’s fine.

I didn’t see any reflect on what led to your fall and what you’ll change. That’s something that I would do. I guess we’re different in that way too.

Respectfully, and with best wishes for your success 

ps… if you can teach me something about how to make a 6 digit income id appreciate it
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I think what yechielmichel is trying to say is, that if all the reasons motivating you to do  this are external, what happens if you lose that reason or it doesn't pan out the way you thought it would?

Strong point. Maskim

If you really believed that at least 100K of income was directly tied to your streak, what ended it?

There is something called additction

 


Yup, know all about it. Just goes to show how we gotta do real internal work (somehow). The things we'll do/give up on to get our fix very often outweigh everything else. Hatzlocha on the journey.
3 things to think about... 
#1 do you want to stop?
#2 WHY do you want to stop?
#3 (assuming you answered yes to #1 and found your why) What behaviors are causing you to fall
#4 stop overthinking
Last Edit: 03 Aug 2022 20:13 by Lchaim Tovim.
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Not sure if y'all read the disclaimer - Mr. Striving to be good seems to be in a good place and he never asked for anyone's help.
He has his plan and is sticking to it.
Respect.
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www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/236327-Bigmoish-tries-to-be-good
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/236329-Bigmoishs-path-to-tahara

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Lchaim Tovim wrote on 03 Aug 2022 19:58:
I think what yechielmichel is trying to say is, that if all the reasons motivating you to do  this are external, what happens if you lose that reason or it doesn't pan out the way you thought it would?

Strong point. Maskim

If you really believed that at least 100K of income was directly tied to your streak, what ended it?

There is something called additction
You wrote "I became successful, I doubled my income in one year, and I was already making six figures BH". That's great but many people here can attest to the fact that it's not guaranteed and that past performance is not an indicator of future results. When I had my longest streak, my income crashed.


I think what yechielmichel is trying to say is, that if all the reasons motivating you to do  this are external, what happens if you lose that reason or it doesn't pan out the way you thought it would?



If you really believed that at least 100K of income was directly tied to your streak, what ended it?
3 things to think about... 
#1 do you want to stop?
#2 WHY do you want to stop?
#3 (assuming you answered yes to #1 and found your why) What behaviors are causing you to fall
#4 stop overthinking
Last Edit: 03 Aug 2022 20:00 by Lchaim Tovim.
yechielmichel wrote:
I hate to pour cold water on this, but it sounds like your setting yourself up for disappointment. Almost none of these things are guaranteed.


If you hate to pour cold water, then don't do it. PERIOD.

Yes, you're right, Success comes from Hashem. Reward for doing good is not immediate...

BUT, to explain to myself, It was all written based on my experience. I had LONG streaks in the past, and these were the results I have gotten in my clean days.

I became successful, I doubled my income in one year, and I was already making six figures BH.

I was much happier since my eyes were not lusting all day.

I loved my wife much more; I was not looking on the streets for others... Yes, the grass is always greener on the other side....
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Something completely out of your hands can derail your schedule. Would you rather have free time with the ability to overcome your challenges or would you rather never having an open moment in your schedule avoiding the challenges but never really addressing  them? 
3 things to think about... 
#1 do you want to stop?
#2 WHY do you want to stop?
#3 (assuming you answered yes to #1 and found your why) What behaviors are causing you to fall
#4 stop overthinking
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Sapy wrote on 03 Aug 2022 15:59:

Larry Bird wrote on 03 Aug 2022 14:21:

Larry Bird wrote on 03 Aug 2022 14:19:
I am still very new around here and learning the ropes. I started off strong with a five-day streak but then fell, got up, lasted one day, and fell again. The two falls were like a sucker punch that came out of nowhere. One moment I am fine, and the next moment BAM. I am back into the cesspool. I am trying to figure out what happened to make this 180-degree change in an instant. Yesterday, I did not see anything on the street or TV, or computer.



Something in my head is triggering me. I was alone, working, and having a somewhat productive day. I was not upset, angry, or sad. It was just a NORMAL day. How can I deal with something I don't even see or feel? I would say that I went from working to falling in the span of 30 seconds. 



What do all of you do in that instance? I didn't have time to make a call or daven. What should one do in this situation? 



Hope this makes sense 
This is exactly me. Productive working.. nothing really going on then all of the sudden BAM. It’s very common.. addiction isn’t this maniacal state of mind. It’s regular day to day life that has this small obstacle in the way. For me, my big issue is if there’s a lull in my work. I’m working diligently, but then there seems to be down time or a lack of tasks to take care of. That is my weakest time. I’ve tried different things. For right now I’m trying to schedule my day to the minute. So I don’t have a free minute unaccounted for. Obviously, this is super challenging, but hopefully it’ll help a little. Be”h.

Not sure what happened to that post. Here is what I meant for it to look like:)

This is exactly me. Productive working.. nothing really going on then all of the sudden BAM. It’s very common.. addiction isn’t this maniacal state of mind. It’s regular day to day life that has this small obstacle in the way. For me, my big issue is if there’s a lull in my work. I’m working diligently, but then there seems to be down time or a lack of tasks to take care of. That is my weakest time. I’ve tried different things. For right now I’m trying to schedule my day to the minute. So I don’t have a free minute unaccounted for. Obviously, this is super challenging, but hopefully it’ll help a little. Be”h.

Mmmm... That must be hard to do, do you think that is a lasting solution? Isnt free time sometimes inevitable? Maybe try to think what's so scary for you to have a quiet moment with yourself? 

Challenging but why is it inevitable? Many great people have strict schedules.
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Larry Bird wrote on 03 Aug 2022 14:21:

Larry Bird wrote on 03 Aug 2022 14:19:
I am still very new around here and learning the ropes. I started off strong with a five-day streak but then fell, got up, lasted one day, and fell again. The two falls were like a sucker punch that came out of nowhere. One moment I am fine, and the next moment BAM. I am back into the cesspool. I am trying to figure out what happened to make this 180-degree change in an instant. Yesterday, I did not see anything on the street or TV, or computer.



Something in my head is triggering me. I was alone, working, and having a somewhat productive day. I was not upset, angry, or sad. It was just a NORMAL day. How can I deal with something I don't even see or feel? I would say that I went from working to falling in the span of 30 seconds. 



What do all of you do in that instance? I didn't have time to make a call or daven. What should one do in this situation? 



Hope this makes sense 
This is exactly me. Productive working.. nothing really going on then all of the sudden BAM. It’s very common.. addiction isn’t this maniacal state of mind. It’s regular day to day life that has this small obstacle in the way. For me, my big issue is if there’s a lull in my work. I’m working diligently, but then there seems to be down time or a lack of tasks to take care of. That is my weakest time. I’ve tried different things. For right now I’m trying to schedule my day to the minute. So I don’t have a free minute unaccounted for. Obviously, this is super challenging, but hopefully it’ll help a little. Be”h.

Not sure what happened to that post. Here is what I meant for it to look like:)

This is exactly me. Productive working.. nothing really going on then all of the sudden BAM. It’s very common.. addiction isn’t this maniacal state of mind. It’s regular day to day life that has this small obstacle in the way. For me, my big issue is if there’s a lull in my work. I’m working diligently, but then there seems to be down time or a lack of tasks to take care of. That is my weakest time. I’ve tried different things. For right now I’m trying to schedule my day to the minute. So I don’t have a free minute unaccounted for. Obviously, this is super challenging, but hopefully it’ll help a little. Be”h.

Mmmm... That must be hard to do, do you think that is a lasting solution? Isnt free time sometimes inevitable? Maybe try to think what's so scary for you to have a quiet moment with yourself? 
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Hi Welcome aboard!

Great post! I just wanna point out, that for most of us, this isnt a quick fix, it's a journey. Make yourself comfortable, it may take some falls, but you will slowly figure yourself out. Dont expect yourself to figure it all out right away, and try not to get frustrated. 

There is obviously an answer to your question, which we cannot answer, what your triggers are, it may be external or internal, I would just recommend you to be curious and open rather then judgemental. Youl be doing great iyh.
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Trouble wrote on 03 Aug 2022 15:24:
i'm thinking the topic for next week's call should be:

"hey darling, do unto me what i do to you (pleeeaaaassssse)."

thoughts?

tuesday's @12, 12:30 or 4:00?

Any options from 1:30 to 3:00?
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Trouble wrote on 03 Aug 2022 14:33:
thank you for this thread.

the most memorable line i remember came from sapy, i think, and something to the effect......: "when all you are doing is counting days, all you have is a streak," or joe dimaggio's 56-game hitting streak, although he wasn't the best hitter of all time - even less than rod carew and certainly ty cobb.

did anyone check if lc"t is still laying in the sand under the volleyball net, drinking his daiquiri? i will ask my friend eodogi dekarube, one of the stars from the 2019 pacific games; played mixed doubles for the nauru beach volleyball team.

That wasnt me, I missed that line on the call. 

The point of the streak is debatable, but I think that all will agree it cant be the goal, reason, motivator and plan...

Some other good stuff discussed:

External vs Internal reason to quit.

The right mindset to safeguards and gedarim.

Planning vs obsessing.

Obstaining vs Changing ourselves.
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i'm thinking the topic for next week's call should be:

"hey darling, do unto me what i do to you (pleeeaaaassssse)."

thoughts?

tuesday's @12, 12:30 or 4:00?
I'm all about that (substantial) bass, no trouble ....
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