Kunena Site Syndication https://guardyoureyes.com Sat, 18 Jan 2020 23:45:08 +0000 Kunena 1.6 https://guardyoureyes.com/components/com_kunena/template/default/images/icons/rss.png https://guardyoureyes.com/ en-gb https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346636-Im-on-a-mission%21#346636 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346636-Im-on-a-mission%21#346636 On the Way to 90-Days Fri, 10 Jan 2020 21:00:15 +0000 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346636-Im-on-a-mission%21#346636 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346461-A-Journal-of-Joy#346461 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346461-A-Journal-of-Joy#346461
This is not the first time I've tried GYE, nor the first screen name I've had. I attempted 90 days a couple of years ago - it didn't go so well.

I've tried therapy, groups, programs other than 12-step, and so on. I've been addicted for at least 27 years, and I'm in my mid-thirties. In the last couple of decades, I went without porn and/or masturbation for 30 days only once.

In fact, in the last couple of decades, I've only gotten through a week just a couple of times.
However, I've never stopped fighting. Oh yes, I've been down, very down, but I've never felt like throwing in the towel.

So what's changed? Why do I think this time will be different? Well, I recently got a real kick in the pants. My wife and I had a beautiful baby. However, I'm afraid that there might be something terribly wrong. It's something that is not easy to tell, and is usually not diagnosed before two years of age. However, there are some early signs.

I pray and cry that my child is healthy. And I know that everything comes from Hashem. I hope that by sincerely changing, Hashem will have mercy on my family. Whether or not this is directly related, I want to use this as a springboard for my recovery. And so I am.

In fact, once I go to sleep tonight, I will have completed 8 days clean. It's not many days, but I tell you, I've only done this a handful of times in my life. It's not just an accomplishment for me, it's Herculean.

The past couple of days have had their fair share of challenges. I'm doing what I can to keep my eyes to myself, but it's a fact of life that you'll run into people in public dressed in ways that trigger you. I'm so deep in p/m that simple words can be triggers.

But I know there's hope. I know enough about the world at large, and GYE in particular, to see that there have been many before me who have walked this path, and have seen success. And so, why not me?

Have a good night,
ToSaveMyLife]]> On the Way to 90-Days Thu, 02 Jan 2020 05:20:46 +0000 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346461-A-Journal-of-Joy#346461 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346376-Trying-again-#346376 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346376-Trying-again-#346376 On the Way to 90-Days Mon, 30 Dec 2019 04:27:50 +0000 https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/346376-Trying-again-#346376