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Keeping Accountability
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TOPIC: Keeping Accountability 7172 Views

Re: Keeping Accountability 05 Nov 2021 20:40 #373986

  • YeshivaGuy
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HappyYid wrote on 29 Oct 2021 01:25:
I didn't expect myself to become one of those 'disappearing people'; but I did...

Had ups and downs recently, now bh holding at day 8. 

I didn't realize how hard it would be to get back up after falling at 180...

My wife sort of figured out that I've been masturbating lately so I renewed my commitment to be clean.

May Hashem help me and everyone else.

HappyYid

I’m very sorry to here. May you be matzliach.
May I ask, l’toeles, whether a wife minds/cares/is upset if her husband masterbates? I understand pornography, but I don’t understand masterbation.
For me, knowing how destructive porn is for marriage helps me stay away, but masterbating has become more common for me as I just view it as any old aveira which won’t directly affect relationship with a wife.

Thanks

Re: Keeping Accountability 07 Nov 2021 01:34 #373997

Wives care because it makes them feel like they're not providing what the husband needs. Actually they aim much higher, they want him to think that she's God's gift to him. Other reasons too: it's assur, they're concerned about what he's thinking about it while he masturbates, and on and on.

Re: Keeping Accountability 07 Nov 2021 02:08 #373998

  • gettingthere9
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YeshivaGuy wrote on 05 Nov 2021 20:40:

HappyYid wrote on 29 Oct 2021 01:25:
I didn't expect myself to become one of those 'disappearing people'; but I did...

Had ups and downs recently, now bh holding at day 8. 

I didn't realize how hard it would be to get back up after falling at 180...

My wife sort of figured out that I've been masturbating lately so I renewed my commitment to be clean.

May Hashem help me and everyone else.

HappyYid

I’m very sorry to here. May you be matzliach.
May I ask, l’toeles, whether a wife minds/cares/is upset if her husband masterbates? I understand pornography, but I don’t understand masterbation.
For me, knowing how destructive porn is for marriage helps me stay away, but masterbating has become more common for me as I just view it as any old aveira which won’t directly affect relationship with a wife.

Thanks

I think, to put it blunt... (At least my wife) considers it kind of like I'm cheating on her when I masturbate. Which if you think about it, is kind of true...
Hope for the best Prepare for the worst

Re: Keeping Accountability 07 Nov 2021 02:17 #373999

  • gettingthere9
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HappyYid wrote on 29 Oct 2021 01:25:
I didn't expect myself to become one of those 'disappearing people'; but I did...

Had ups and downs recently, now bh holding at day 8. 

I didn't realize how hard it would be to get back up after falling at 180...

My wife sort of figured out that I've been masturbating lately so I renewed my commitment to be clean.

May Hashem help me and everyone else.

HappyYid

Thanx for sharing, I feel for you.
Interestingly, I am holding pretty close to the big 180 and I am kind of teetering... Trying to hang in there at least till then. I have also pretty much stopped posting and only pop in on the forums occasionally these days... 
I need to focus on the long term more than the streak. As well as remembering how hard it can be to get back up after a fall.
Hope for the best Prepare for the worst

Re: Keeping Accountability 08 Feb 2022 02:59 #377007

  • HappyYid
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Day 13 bh. 

After stepping away from GYE for a few months I feel like there's a whole new world of people here, amazing!
I feel like a new guy in a new Yeshiva lol

But bh things are going good. I'm just very busy and don't have the time like I used to have...

I 'by mistake' had access to an unfiltered device for some time, but now took care of that so hopefully things will be only good.

Good to be back here, I missed it.

Good night
Happyyid
Feel free to contact me happyyid613@gmail.com
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Re: Keeping Accountability 08 Feb 2022 03:42 #377010

  • HappyYid
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YeshivaGuy wrote on 05 Nov 2021 20:40:

HappyYid wrote on 29 Oct 2021 01:25:
I didn't expect myself to become one of those 'disappearing people'; but I did...

Had ups and downs recently, now bh holding at day 8. 

I didn't realize how hard it would be to get back up after falling at 180...

My wife sort of figured out that I've been masturbating lately so I renewed my commitment to be clean.

May Hashem help me and everyone else.

HappyYid

I’m very sorry to here. May you be matzliach.
May I ask, l’toeles, whether a wife minds/cares/is upset if her husband masterbates? I understand pornography, but I don’t understand masterbation.
For me, knowing how destructive porn is for marriage helps me stay away, but masterbating has become more common for me as I just view it as any old aveira which won’t directly affect relationship with a wife.

Thanks

It's never too late...

Like others were saying; typically people think of other women (or men) while masturbating so that would make my wife feel like I love someone else besides her, which obviously is not too good of a feeling. 
It gives my wife pleasure when I 'let it out' with her knowing that I'm thinking of her. Masturbating by myself tells her that there is someone else that I am thinking of. 

So no, don't do it; it will affect your relationship with your wife. 
But also the fact that she knows it's assur, and that it's a big aveira is not too good either..

We miss you here on the forum, like you used to be, I hope you are doing well.

Hatzlacha!
Feel free to contact me happyyid613@gmail.com
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Re: Keeping Accountability 08 Feb 2022 04:27 #377016

  • Sapy
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Hello!

Re: Keeping Accountability 08 Feb 2022 04:30 #377018

  • HappyYid
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Feel free to contact me happyyid613@gmail.com
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Re: Keeping Accountability 08 Feb 2022 12:03 #377037

  • Hashem Help Me
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Welcome back!!
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Keeping Accountability 09 Feb 2022 05:03 #377091

  • HappyYid
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Day 14. 
Staying strong.

Back in the day posting regularly really help me stay clean for a long time, so I think I should try that again, but I don't have the time...I have to make time.

Good night
Feel free to contact me happyyid613@gmail.com
My thread

Re: Keeping Accountability 11 Feb 2022 05:27 #377248

  • HappyYid
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Had a slip. 
Starting the count again.

Good night 
Feel free to contact me happyyid613@gmail.com
My thread
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