Read once, then minimize to save screen space.

Forum Overview

Post on the forum to get support, tell your story and reach out for help when feeling weak!

You will never be alone in this struggle again.

The GYE forum is anonymous platform of group support, and a life-line of chizuk for hundreds of people in exactly your situation. 

To use the forum you need to first become a member of the site, sign up here.

After signing up to the site, go to the forum, enter one of our boards and press "New Topic" to begin posting! 

Welcome, Guest

There must be a way
(0 viewing) 
Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: There must be a way 4654 Views

Re: There must be a way 15 Dec 2020 06:37 #358746

  • YeshivaGuy
  • Current streak: 3 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 990
  • Karma: 62
All good?

Re: There must be a way 09 Jan 2021 22:08 #360922

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
Update: day 127

As much as I love you all and need you all I have almost no time these days, will probably stay this way for another couple of weeks. (I'm happy to speak on the phone though.) 
Came on to wish our hero r' grant a big mazel tov on his 90

B"h still appreciating the journey to cleanliness. 


Have not been with my wife for 2 weeks as she wasn't well and now have another 12 days at least...
It's fine, @YeshivaGuy and some at hers have paved the way... 

I see some talk about some of the old guys that joined and either did break free or didn't, either did work out what works for them or didn't and then disappearing to either stay clean. 
Personally, I'm not an 'old guy', I don't think I've broken free and certainly am not disappearing but I will excuse myself and say that recently I have a few short hours at night from which to choose between gye or sleep... 

One more thing before I disappear again, my threads are free for all especially if you notice a post which could be a chizzuk, my thread is really just a nice collection which can be used as quick chizzuk 
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number

Re: There must be a way 14 Jan 2021 21:16 #361328

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
Had/having quite a hard day

A huge project that I'm working on is delayed for a few days and everything that I was under crazy pressure to have finished already is basically done so now I have some extra time and feeling the stress of this project. Invested loads of time, effort and borrowed money in this and with time on my hands I'm feeling the stress more. 
Whatever. 

You guys are here for me and that keeps me going

P. S. That shiur by Rabbi Kallas in today's chizzuk email is a must listen
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number

Re: There must be a way 14 Jan 2021 21:24 #361329

Starting, you got this!!!

Re: There must be a way 14 Jan 2021 23:34 #361336

  • Sapy
  • NOW ONLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 225
  • Karma: 21
starting wrote on 06 Dec 2020 11:27:

But actually falling is not for me. Tough. Not doing it. 

@starting even you said that falling is not for you... and we cant agree more... 

Re: There must be a way 31 Jan 2021 06:26 #362314

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
I fell
Was weird. I was half asleep and really not planning on masturbation when I found my hands in the wrong places. A couple of seconds and it was over. 

The thing is, it hasn't actually registered properly in my brain that I've fallen. I still feel like I'm 150 days clean with a break at 145. Kind of like my cctv in the warehouse. I repositioned one camera last week so in the recording there is a couple of minutes missing. But it still feels like I've had the cameras since I moved in there just there is a drop missing. 

I really wish I would be here more, fresh chizzuk would have probably stopped me from falling but I haven't time or strength after a full day of work and the some. 

My hope is to be here on Wednesdays and Thursdays in the future which should be the quietest days. 

Other than that I'm clean. Monstah truck style. 
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number

Re: There must be a way 01 Feb 2021 06:29 #362446

  • Realestatemogul
  • Current streak: 133 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 385
  • Karma: 29
Keep it up! We are here for you! 

Hope to see you around (even if you don't have time )

Re: There must be a way 01 Feb 2021 06:33 #362450

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
Was a good day

Spoke on the phone. Accountability is preventing slipping. 

Could use more motivation. Back when I was up to my nose in this I knew what I didn't want anymore. 
Now I pretty much know what do want but have forgotten a bit about the cons of lust.

So I have been slipping a bit recently and even fell once last week because I have been away too much recently. 
Need help remembering the bad times and that lust is....
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number

Re: There must be a way 01 Feb 2021 07:00 #362452

  • Zedj
  • Current streak: 163 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 420
  • Karma: 24
Your a major chizuk to us.
A small reminder to take this one day at a time!
I sometimes forget about this #1 rule but it is the only way.
Your a constant inspiration (especially with all the posts that resonate)!

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Re: There must be a way 01 Feb 2021 21:19 #362500

Start by keeping your mind clean. Bad images and thoughts are going to pop up from time to time, I'm sure thats just a fact of life for most of us. But the bad thought doesnt have to stay there. You can choose if you want to keep chasing it, or if you want to stop. You can't fight your own thoughts but you can choose to stop thinking and, for example, stare at a wall for a few seconds, read a book. Just do something to keep your head clean and you'll keep yourself clean.

We all know that our heads are on top, our hearts are further down, and the part we sin with is lower than that. I believe that if we win the battle in our heads it will stop the urge from going down to our hearts which will stop it from going lower than that (AKA sinning). Just remember: Head, Heart, "sinning part." The higher up your body the fight  is the better it is for you.

Re: There must be a way 02 Feb 2021 07:04 #362533

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
Love this but at the same time it's a way of stopping the fall, or of pulling the battle closer to safe ground. 
This helps a lot and the post is a beautiful way of putting it. 
I also need more motivation, reminders as to how much I want to be clean. 
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number

Re: There must be a way 02 Feb 2021 07:05 #362534

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
Was a good day. 

Got nice messages. Thanks 
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number

Re: There must be a way 02 Feb 2021 07:15 #362536

  • YeshivaGuy
  • Current streak: 3 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 990
  • Karma: 62
starting wrote on 02 Feb 2021 07:04:

I also need more motivation, reminders as to how much I want to be clean. 

I’ve looked up to u since I first came man, so thank You.
As far as motivation, emotions are tough...

We can start here from scratch again, Why is it that you want to be clean?

Re: There must be a way 02 Feb 2021 09:45 #362540

  • wilnevergiveup
  • Current streak: 148 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 703
  • Karma: 40
starting wrote on 01 Feb 2021 06:33:
Was a good day

Spoke on the phone. Accountability is preventing slipping. 

Could use more motivation. Back when I was up to my nose in this I knew what I didn't want anymore. 
Now I pretty much know what do want but have forgotten a bit about the cons of lust.

So I have been slipping a bit recently and even fell once last week because I have been away too much recently. 
Need help remembering the bad times and that lust is....

Take a moment to read through your "recent post that resonates" thread and really take a moment to let each post sink in. Don't do it all in one shot maybe even one or two posts a day, but try to do it everyday for the next few days/weeks. 

You know what works for you, and you know that you don't want or need the garbage. You just need some chazarah of the obvious. Like the Mesilas Yesharim says in the hakdamah, no chidushim, just a way to keep focus on what you already know.

Chazarah, chazarah, chazarah!

All the best, 
Wilnevergiveup 
Check out My thread

Daily Dose of Clarity

(עשה רצונו כרצונך (אבות,ב:ד

Feel free to email me  wilnevergiveupgye@gmail.com

Re: There must be a way 03 Feb 2021 10:41 #362617

  • starting
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 427
Thanks for you replies. 
I'm still overloaded with work. B"h I got almost 4 hours of sleep. 
Will hopefully have time later today or tomorrow to read your comments properly and work on your ideas (?) 
The start of 'STARting' is 'star'. Just start and you're a star!!
... and btw I really really love you! you keep me inspired!

'the cleaner I stay, the cleaner I stay' - AlexEliezer
העבר עיני מראות שוא, בדרכך חינו (תהלים קיט, לז)
PM me for my phone number
Time to create page: 0.56 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes