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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Hayom Yom 10021 Views

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 04:11 #361428

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BHYY wrote on 15 Jan 2021 18:29:
YES!!!!!!
I went to the barber this morning and he always has the TV going. Always a game show at that time and I usually watch along (it's a barber's waiting area...what are you supposed to do??) But I joined YESOD for Shovavim and wanted no extra triggers while I'm home this Shabbos. It wasn't easy but I went in and sat down, pulled out my phone and opened Uvlechtecha Baderech and did Shnayim Mikra.
These eyes didn't see a game show, no hosts, no contestants, no models. These eyes are clean!
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HERO!!!!!!
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 05:20 #361429

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Shabbos was really nice Baruch Hashem.
Friday night I was having some fantasy dream that I (chasdei Hashem) cannot recall. I woke up in the middle of the night about to ejaculate but B"H did not. I have not been entertaining fantasies these past couple of days so I am assuming it was my Y"H going a meshugeh and trying to get me. Either way, we go on.
I have a little bit of freedom tomorrow in when I return to Yeshiva, I don't have to rush back early in the morning as I usually do. This staying home a little longer is making me nervous because it is more time where I can c"v be nichshal. My gedarim are still firmly in place. Daven, never touch an unfiltered device, and Daven some more. 

Today! Damn it! Today!

נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 18:38 #361453

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Just got a really strong urge. I'm still home and I decided to do a little household maintenance for my parents that I've been pushing off. They went out and I just got hit with a huge urge. There is an unfiltered computer steps away from me.
But I'm not going on it. I'm not going to masturbate either. I don't do that anymore. I don't need to do this. I'm going to get past this.
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 19:03 #361456

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Such a desire to sin now. So easy to go and slip into a fantasy world for a few hours. 
I will not.
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 19:09 #361457

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BHYY, you got this! Hang in there!
Is there anything else you can do to ride the waves here until they pass? Go for a run, pushups, bais medrash, etc.?

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 19:14 #361458

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BHYY wrote on 17 Jan 2021 19:03:
Such a desire to sin now. So easy to go and slip into a fantasy world for a few hours. 
I will not.

Once small step for pleasure...

                One giant step for pain...

                                     You got this...

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 19:57 #361461

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Still have an urge but going strong. Not going to give in.
Going to learn now.
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 17 Jan 2021 20:52 #361464

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We are holding by Parshas Bo and I heard the following amazing vort from Rav Ephraim Eliyahu Shapiro.

The worst of the makkos was choshech. (Excluding makas bechoros which was in a league of itself, none of the other makkos started with “makas”). Out of the first 9, the worst of the makkos was choshech. Why? There were many other makkos that had much larger loss of human and animal life!

R’ Shabsi Yudilevitz said that because in the first 8 makkos they had each other. In choshech they were alone. People can tolerate a lot of things, but one thing many people cannot tolerate is being alone. So firstly, I want to thank all of my chaveirim here on GYE from the bottom of my heart for being there for me at all hours of the day and making it that I don’t go through this alone.

And to those who may be reading the forums but who haven’t taken the plunge and started posting, please do. Please start a thread, share your story and get it out. Reach out to others who are in the same predicament as you, whether by email, text, or call. Don’t go through this alone! I tried and failed for years. Don’t believe me? Read through my first thread and note the date stamps, the long hiatuses between posts. Also not that not much progress was made when I tried going at it myself. I opened up and reached out to other members of the site. Starting with texting and then calling and finally meeting in person. I met with a close Rebbe and told him my whole story. No one should have to go through this alone. We are all in this together.

The battle is so much easier to win with everyone’s support, chizuk, and love.

So please, join us.

נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 18 Jan 2021 05:04 #361483

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B’chasdei Hashem I made it through today clean. Thank you all for your help and Chizuk. I couldn’t have done it without you. 
Today marks one full week clean!
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 19 Jan 2021 00:48 #361532

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Today B”H is 8 days clean. I have something amazing to share. 
Where I work in the afternoon there are other frum women. B”H with my dollars method I for the most part look away when passing one in the hallway but there was always that feeling, that thought. Today I passed on my way to Mincha and there were no sexual thoughts. No objectifying. Just she’s a human, just like me. 
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 19 Jan 2021 01:03 #361534

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Wow! You are amazing! 
My threads:
Giving it another shot

One step at a time

Daily (I hope) Excerpt from Sefer Zos Brisi

I am going to beat this monster one step at a time... One day at a time!

Re: Hayom Yom 19 Jan 2021 01:41 #361537

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BHYY wrote on 19 Jan 2021 00:48:
Today B”H is 8 days clean. I have something amazing to share. 
Where I work in the afternoon there are other frum women. B”H with my dollars method I for the most part look away when passing one in the hallway but there was always that feeling, that thought. Today I passed on my way to Mincha and there were no sexual thoughts. No objectifying. Just she’s a human, just like me. 

Liberating, isn't it. 

Re: Hayom Yom 19 Jan 2021 04:25 #361544

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Grant400 wrote on 19 Jan 2021 01:41:

BHYY wrote on 19 Jan 2021 00:48:
Today B”H is 8 days clean. I have something amazing to share. 
Where I work in the afternoon there are other frum women. B”H with my dollars method I for the most part look away when passing one in the hallway but there was always that feeling, that thought. Today I passed on my way to Mincha and there were no sexual thoughts. No objectifying. Just she’s a human, just like me. 

Liberating, isn't it. 

Extremely!
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 20 Jan 2021 05:08 #361607

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9 days clean B’chasdei Hashem. 
Shidduchim, as per the usual agreement, are driving me crazy. There still is that anxiety but I feel that there is this different clarity and calmness that comes with staying clean. I feel able to think clearer about certain things and don’t just stress out.
ODAAT
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom

Re: Hayom Yom 21 Jan 2021 00:17 #361653

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Today marks 10 days clean, or as Bigmoish would say, 10 one days all strung together.
I had to go into an often triggering location (a supermaket in an area where the standards of tznius are pushed) and B"H I kept my head down and got my business done with. I even called a GYE friend in order to be accountable. I used to blame the situation, "Well they don't dress tzniusdig, they basically force me to" and go in to enjoy the scenery. But not today!
Thank you Hashem!
נאָך אַ שריפה ווערט מען רייַך - After a fire one becomes wealthy.

My email: bhyy@protonmail.com

My thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/349632-Hayom-Yom
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