Read once, then minimize to save screen space.

Forum Overview

Post on the forum to get support, tell your story and reach out for help when feeling weak!

You will never be alone in this struggle again.

The GYE forum is anonymous platform of group support, and a life-line of chizuk for hundreds of people in exactly your situation. 

To use the forum you need to first become a member of the site, sign up here.

After signing up to the site, go to the forum, enter one of our boards and press "New Topic" to begin posting! 

Welcome, Guest

The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:)
(0 viewing) 
Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:) 51406 Views

Re: The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:) 26 Mar 2019 03:42 #339997

  • Trouble
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 520
  • Karma: 125
Dov wrote on 20 Feb 2017 17:02:
I think Shlomo24 said it all when he wrote that change requires change.
And Shteeble said the truth when he wrote that if it's important to you then spend time on it.
And I agree w Tiger who wrote that opening up to a safe person who understands is the way to go.

All that stuff says to me that if I look at how I conduct myself during the years of acting out, I will learn how to do things right...by basically doing the opposite. Isolation is king when I act out. Heck, even when I'm not acting out, the worse I feel the more I tend to isolate. If I am lusting or angry or sad, boy do I make myself lonelier by trachten un trachten, etc. and 'figuring it all out'...cuz after all, nobody can really understand me, right?

So if I wanna get right, then I need to do the opposite and start learning how to make friends, how to share myself without cleaning off all my dirt first, and to practice doing those things. Thinking about them will not help me. Thinking is a great part of my problem itself because it increases my fantasy of self-reliance and 'salvation through havonah' - and those things lead to one thing: more masturbation (in private, of course). 

And I have learned that fake named friends are not really real friends. So what you really need ain't happening here staying on any forum. But it's a sweet intro.

And I have learned that self-honesty is the fruit of being honest with others. Kind of like na'aseh venishma works...counter-intuitive. The silly brain tells me that I need to first be fully self-honest so that I will know just what to say to others...and that's a lie.

So, continued hatzlocha you are on the path with us knuckleheads!  

Glad to be a fellow knucklehead!
I'm all about that (substantial) bass, no trouble ....

Re: The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:) 16 Jun 2019 03:36 #341760

  • Hakolhevel
  • Current streak: 7 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 252
  • Karma: 22
Hi everybody sorry for the long delay it's just that the app on my phone keeps crashing every time I try and post or update my thread.

So here it goes after 200 and plus days I had a fa fall or to be exact I acted out in ways that (falling ma makes it sound like it wasn't my fault)

So he here are some observations.

Number 1 check out the thread by real estate mogul there is a discussion regardi regarding cumulative days and streaks. I will just put in my own two cents that I c after being clean for a while it's definitely a different experience and I feel that I have gain a lot and I hope that it will help me in the future

2. There is a saying money can't buy Happiness but it sure can help The same thing can be said about filters they won't make you clean but they sure can help. My most recent stint in the trash can was due to le leaving a unfiltered device around the house. I did not get around to filtering it be I felt I was in a good place and that I w was not in a rush to filter it. I'm not saying i if it wasn't around I would not have acted out. But it has happened before tha That's when the quote candy is not available so easily saner you're thinking takes over before you get to act out.

Re: The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:) 08 Nov 2019 14:27 #345002

  • Hakolhevel
  • Current streak: 7 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 252
  • Karma: 22
I was listening to Eli Nash last night. (For those who don't know he's a successful business man who has come out and talks openly, and wants to make people aware there is hope to kicking porn/sex addiction)

He said a great line. He still goes to meetings three times a week even though he's sober 2 and a half years because.

Im not a slow learner, I'm just quick to forget"

I need to stamp those words on my forehead

Re: The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:) 08 Nov 2019 16:18 #345007

  • Trouble
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 520
  • Karma: 125
Hakolhevel wrote on 08 Nov 2019 14:27:
I was listening to Eli Nash last night. (For those who don't know he's a successful business man who has come out and talks openly, and wants to make people aware there is hope to kicking porn/sex addiction)

He said a great line. He still goes to meetings three times a week even though he's sober 2 and a half years because.

Im not a slow learner, I'm just quick to forget"

I need to stamp those words on my forehead

You remind me of what my sponsor used to tell me, almost every day: the addiction causes us to forget many things.
I'm all about that (substantial) bass, no trouble ....

Re: The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:) 11 Nov 2019 04:20 #345052

  • sleepy
  • NOW ONLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 392
Trouble wrote on 08 Nov 2019 16:18:

Hakolhevel wrote on 08 Nov 2019 14:27:
I was listening to Eli Nash last night. (For those who don't know he's a successful business man who has come out and talks openly, and wants to make people aware there is hope to kicking porn/sex addiction)

He said a great line. He still goes to meetings three times a week even though he's sober 2 and a half years because.

Im not a slow learner, I'm just quick to forget"

I need to stamp those words on my forehead

You remind me of what my sponsor used to tell me, almost every day: the addiction causes us to forget many things.

thats IN ADDITION to having a yetzer hara that causes us to forget many things
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post
Time to create page: 0.47 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes