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The 90 Day Chart
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!
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TOPIC: The 90 Day Chart 1949 Views

Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 01:33 #266391

  • Markz
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Breaking Free Chizuk #1346 - The Great Debate
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Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 01:41 #266392

  • serenity
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Pls provide a link or forward the email to me. Ty.
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 02:38 #266397

  • serenity
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Thank you for forwarding the email. I read the opinion of David J. Ley about 6 months ago and it infuriated me and still does, The man is an imbecile.
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 18:36 #266450

  • Shlomo24
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I read the title and about three sentences. I didn't need to read more. You know why? because it doesn't make one mashehu of a difference whether some hoydy toydy group of shrinks say "you're not an addict, sexual addiction is impossible". i still have to work my program to get sober and the program still works for me. the sex addiction debate is water under the bridge. for all intents and purposes there are what i call "strugglers" and "addicts", an addict generally needs a much different kind of help for his/her problem while something like taphshic might work for a struggler.

(the email was from the breaking free GYE daily emails)
What works for me: 1) Honesty 2) Meetings 3) 12-step 4) Listening to my Sponsor 5) Not doing what I want to do 6) Inviting the God of my understanding into my life

"I can't do it, God can help." | "Everything I want is on the other side of fear." | "Where there is deprivation there is addiction." | "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery." | "Stop stopping, start living."

My thread: Big Steps

Email: iam24zman@gmail.com
Last Edit: 20 Oct 2015 18:37 by Shlomo24.

Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 18:40 #266453

  • cordnoy
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Shlomo24 wrote:
I read the title and about three sentences. I didn't need to read more. You know why? because it doesn't make one mashehu of a difference whether some hoydy toydy group of shrinks say "you're not an addict, sexual addiction is impossible". i still have to work my program to get sober and the program still works for me. the sex addiction debate is water under the bridge. for all intents and purposes there are what i call "strugglers" and "addicts", an addict generally needs a much different kind of help for his/her problem while something like taphshic might work for a struggler.

(the email was from the breaking free GYE daily emails)


I told my therapist similarly today.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 18:48 #266456

  • Shlomo24
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cordnoy wrote:
Shlomo24 wrote:
I read the title and about three sentences. I didn't need to read more. You know why? because it doesn't make one mashehu of a difference whether some hoydy toydy group of shrinks say "you're not an addict, sexual addiction is impossible". i still have to work my program to get sober and the program still works for me. the sex addiction debate is water under the bridge. for all intents and purposes there are what i call "strugglers" and "addicts", an addict generally needs a much different kind of help for his/her problem while something like taphshic might work for a struggler.

(the email was from the breaking free GYE daily emails)


I told my therapist similarly today.


i had an inkling that we would have similar opinions
What works for me: 1) Honesty 2) Meetings 3) 12-step 4) Listening to my Sponsor 5) Not doing what I want to do 6) Inviting the God of my understanding into my life

"I can't do it, God can help." | "Everything I want is on the other side of fear." | "Where there is deprivation there is addiction." | "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery." | "Stop stopping, start living."

My thread: Big Steps

Email: iam24zman@gmail.com

Re: The 90 Day (Chart) Debate 20 Oct 2015 23:18 #266495

  • Markz
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Posted in todays email

Sayings
YOU CAN ARGUE REASONS NOT TO WORK THE TWELVE STEPS FAR FASTER THAN I CAN NAME REASONS TO WORK THEM. SO, WHO IS WINNING THIS CONTEST, REALLY?
.

Anyone needing a copy you can subscribe, it's free, or email me markzgye@gmail.com
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Last Edit: 20 Oct 2015 23:20 by Markz.

Re: The 90 Day Chart 06 Jan 2019 13:24 #338233

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cordnoy wrote on 03 Jan 2019 21:42:

lomed wrote:
I also have two streaks of sobriety, which the first was 690 with a one night relapse, and then currently 716 days one day at a time.

From a baseball hittin' streak, yes, it was broken in the middle. Relevant to God, yourself and others, it is 1406 (and perhaps more). It is one of the stupid things about this 90 day countin'. If one gets stuck in an elevator for an hour with an object of his desire (I do apologize to all the folk for callin' you objects) and nature takes over, why in the world is he regarded as a zero? Makes no sense to me. Yes, rules are rules, but if it would be up to me, I would think that the numbers highlighted should be the accumulative days clean, and I probably said this once or twice before.
Gotta run, the elevator beeped for my floor. Goin' up (I hope).

There's a difference between relapse and a fall.

Someone that is in active recovery at 90 days+ and has a momentary fall could continue his Clean streak count, whereas relapse should hit the restart button.

That's my humble pie experience.

What's yours?

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Re: The 90 Day Chart 06 Jan 2019 21:34 #338244

  • cordnoy
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Depends what "relapse" means.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The 90 Day Chart 07 Jan 2019 13:59 #338258

  • brlife101
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In concept what is different from a momentary fall and a relapse for the “clean count”?

Re: The 90 Day Chart 09 Jan 2019 17:38 #338328

  • Markz
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By relapse I mean unlike a one time fall, but a nice long binge, even with some sporadic good days. 

Again I'm talking my experience.
I had a nice streak of 650 days from Aug 2015-2017. Then relapsed and got up and down and up and down until recently, so now my accumulated days is 1225, how amazing! 

What I'm seeking is long term success, and the beginning of that new journey will be my sobriety date (and a random fall c'v won't shut down the highway).
Maybe I'm on the path already? Possibly, as I wrote at end of 'my story' thank Gd. 

Hope I answered your q'
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➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
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