Read once, then minimize to save screen space.

Forum Overview

Post on the forum to get support, tell your story and reach out for help when feeling weak!

You will never be alone in this struggle again.

The GYE forum is anonymous platform of group support, and a life-line of chizuk for hundreds of people in exactly your situation. 

To use the forum you need to first become a member of the site, sign up here.

After signing up to the site, go to the forum, enter one of our boards and press "New Topic" to begin posting! 

Welcome, Guest
A recent scientific study shows that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong! See www.guardyoureyes.com/tools/90-day-chart.

TOPIC: enough is enough! 10910 Views

Re: enough is enough! 29 Aug 2018 14:55 #335136

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
cordnoy wrote on 29 Aug 2018 07:08:

Pidaini wrote on 07 Jul 2015 03:52:
Machooooooool Lach, Machooooooooool Lach, Machooooooool Lach!!!

The ikkur is to Keep on Trucking!! Whether it's mega or monstuh, mamish or moiredig.....Just keep on Trucking!!

Another point is to remember the "habitat" in which falls usually take place, isolation. Keeping in touch and honest with friends is one of the most helpful preventatives.

Another component which a fall feeds off of is being unproductive. Try and keep doing things, anything, that is productive.

Keep on trucking, just one more mile!! When you're there, give us a beep, we'll tell you what your next goal is (that is, if you can't guess yourself )

Sounds like you're keepin' connected. What's with the productivity? Went thru many of the posts on this thread now; have you read the handbook?

Godspeed

I am productive though I tend  to minimize my accomplishments in my mind(self esteem issues ?)  But If ploini was accomplishing what I do than I probably would think hes fantastic and be jealous...
As far as the handbook I've read a little here and there it seems like a lot of it can be picked up by reading around the forums  but I guess I will try to read it cover to cover anything to help the cause...

Re: enough is enough! 09 Sep 2018 21:08 #335413

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
Thank you to everyone here  I feel that I have something to show this RH - I'm heading in the right direction and have accomplished a tremendous amount in this area , the beautiful achdus and teamwork make a really big differance
Ah Gut yor to all.

Re: enough is enough! 12 Sep 2018 01:26 #335417

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
Gut vocht Gut Yor 
Yomtov went by very well 'B'H - every time the yetzer horah put a bad thought in my head or an attractive woman in my sight I quickly turned my mind to "zugs" that the olam here says , Im not sure the correct recovery term for that but whatever it is it was working so thank you 

Re: enough is enough! 14 Sep 2018 04:41 #335486

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
Last night I had a slip nu , I called the champ today, I was going to leave it out but I told him and we discussed and it felt good to "fess up" , than it hit me - this is what  vidui is admitting to someone who cares about you  (in this instance a million fold ) and He wants me to succeed , and it helps me move past stuff , If I say it properly I should experience that same emotion.. gonna keep that in mind.

Editors note: RH YK and Teshuva can be able complex subject for many here I'm not suggesting anyone do anything. 

Re: enough is enough! 14 Oct 2018 03:34 #336185

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
I am Doing pretty good B'H I think I put the summers falls behind me .
What I am doing to stay clean :
- I try to be in touch with some of the wonderful group out here.
- I read the forums ect to get ideas and chizuk
- I" let go" to Hashem when I have a challenge 
- I try to stop any looking or thinking etc by calling out the lust and shutting it down .
This is the basic Gameplan right now with a few others obviously including Tefilah.
I have yet to properly utilize the odaat concept I'm not sure how to rewire my brain.

Thank you all this site is incredible. 

Re: enough is enough! 14 Oct 2018 05:11 #336187

  • Hashem Help Me
  • Current streak: 823 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1736
Rewiring the brain is a slow process that takes place without one noticing. Being focused, hearing advice, listening to shiurim, helping others, all have a slow yet powerful effect. One day you will iyh wake up and say, "wow, I really think differently about these things now". Iyh soon buddy.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: enough is enough! 22 Oct 2018 22:27 #336550

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
Since late last night I have been getting strong urges every few hours to get my hands on some porn - not sure what for it would so devoid of any actual pleasure - well no one said it's a rational thing...
I pledge to Make a phone call before doing anything I will check back in later.
Last Edit: 22 Oct 2018 22:48 by i-man.

Re: enough is enough! 23 Oct 2018 02:36 #336574

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
B'H calling definitely helped things cool off 

Thanks to Mike of Mike'sTrucking Co.
for giving me the idea to commit to call someone and report back .

Re: enough is enough! 23 Oct 2018 19:09 #336612

  • mikestrucking
  • Current streak: 71 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • I am a good person who is unfortunately sick
  • Posts: 311
  • Karma: 19
iI appreciate the positive press coverage of my business (trucking)
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
Formerly mikestruggling I just bought a truck. l hang out in the trailer and G-d drives. 
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!

Re: enough is enough! 28 Oct 2018 07:17 #336723

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
I slipped broke through some of the gedarim I have set up - I almost acted out...

Motzai Shabbos can be a major trigger for me- I get lazy and lethargic,  not focused on doing anything constructive  so I end feeling useless and it goes downhill , anyone have a similar issue ? any good ideas ?

Re: enough is enough! 28 Oct 2018 07:51 #336724

  • mzl
  • Current streak: 28 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 996
i-man wrote on 28 Oct 2018 07:17:
I slipped broke through some of the gedarim I have set up - I almost acted out...

Motzai Shabbos can be a major trigger for me- I get lazy and lethargic,  not focused on doing anything constructive  so I end feeling useless and it goes downhill , anyone have a similar issue ? any good ideas ?

You could try having pre-planned activities for that time. Plan something now for next motzai Shabbos.

Re: enough is enough! 28 Oct 2018 11:30 #336726

  • Hashem Help Me
  • Current streak: 823 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1736
i-man wrote on 28 Oct 2018 07:17:
I slipped broke through some of the gedarim I have set up - I almost acted out...

Motzai Shabbos can be a major trigger for me- I get lazy and lethargic,  not focused on doing anything constructive  so I end feeling useless and it goes downhill , anyone have a similar issue ? any good ideas ?

Motzai Shabbos is one of the most triggering times for many. The Aruch Hashulchan even comments that people are edgy and irritable then due to the loss of the neshama yeseira.  Ideas. Before Shabbos, contact some of your GYE chaverim and ask them to check in after Shabbos. The accountability, knowing someone cares, helps alot. Even just the fact that you have the presence of mind to share a challenge usually minimizes the urge. Secondly, if you have an Avos Ubanim program in your area, attend. If you dont have a son that age, offer to learn with a yasom or a child from a divorced home or a boy whose father is unfortunatel unwell. Many of these programs also include some gym time for the boys. Join the physical activity. And if they dont include gym, or if the Avos Ubonim program does not work out, find some other exercise opportunity.  Lasltly, as mzl wrote, find something you enjoy. A walk with your wife, a chavrusa to learn with a specific limud specifically for motzai Shabbos (suggestion - Minchas Chinuch), etc.  BH you stayed clean, celebrate that fact and thank Hashem. Continued hatzlocha chaver! 
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: enough is enough! 28 Oct 2018 12:30 #336729

  • mzl
  • Current streak: 28 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 996
I meant any activity, as long as it's planned ahead of time. Because that is one remedy for procrastination and laziness. E.g. clean the bathroom, shop ...

Re: enough is enough! 28 Oct 2018 12:52 #336731

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
mzl wrote on 28 Oct 2018 12:30:
I meant any activity, as long as it's planned ahead of time. Because that is one remedy for procrastination and laziness. E.g. clean the bathroom, shop ...

No thanks - theres enough cleaning and shopping BEFORE shabbos...

Re: enough is enough! 02 Dec 2018 07:42 #337637

  • i-man
  • Current streak: 19 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 279
  • Karma: 22
I just unintentionally came across this interesting set of shailos nogeah to the upcoming YT "food" for thought...The NUDNIK asksby ... 12 Dec 2012 23:04#200114Karma: 3 
I can see the topic has moved from hairs to doughnuts, I don't usually like to see them together - hairs and doughnuts ;-) But talking of doughnuts, I have had some serious halachik shaalos about doughnuts on Chanukah: 1) is the icing on the doughnuts considered a chatzitza? 2) aren't the additional toppings like icing and chocolate a problem of בל תוסיף in the חפצא of the doughnut? 3) what is the minimum shiur in the size of the doughnut? כזית כביצה כגריס 4) is the jelly halocho lemoshe mesinai?  5) if one forgot to eat a doughnut on one of the nights, is there תשלומין on the next night? 6) if you have a choice between 2 doughnuts, one has no topping (so no problem of חציצה) but it has no jelly ר״ל! Or one which has jelly, but it also has icing. So should u go for the one with jelly even though there is a problem of חציצה because of the icing, or should u go for the one without jelly but at least there is no חציצה! Or שב ועל תעשה עדיף?
Time to create page: 0.54 seconds