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Yaakov's Ladder
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Yaakov's Ladder 126150 Views

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 25 Jul 2013 23:55 #213604

  • inastruggle
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mazel tov.


zulst hubben asach yiddish nachas

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 26 Jul 2013 01:58 #213653

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OOOIINNKKKKK..... sorry, it has a lasting affect.


So I had an interesting day, started out with a Bris (Mazal Tov!!!), and my inlaws came in for it. for some reason even after i slept off the lost sleep, I had this urge, yeah....that one...

I realized that my last fall also came right after my inlaws had left, something is amiss

so i asked skep, and he pinpointed it right away, insecurity of ME!! which is interesting because in the shiur from Rabbi Akiva Tatz he makes the observation that nisyonos come to a person when they have a moment of doubt of who they really are. so that was it, for some reason (even though they are the nicest people) my inlaws bring out some sort of insecurity of who I should be. and therefore the need to set life into motion .

I'm still somewhere in between the problem and the solution, so anyone who can type it for me it would be greatly appreciated.

have a great Shabbos!!
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
Last Edit: 28 Jul 2013 01:12 by Pidaini.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 26 Jul 2013 02:16 #213660

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Pidaini wrote:
(even though they are the nicest people)



It's ok you can be honest here. You're anonymous (besides when someone guesses your name).
If you aren't going to be honest here then we can't help you.
Last Edit: 26 Jul 2013 02:17 by inastruggle.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 28 Jul 2013 21:32 #213840

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It was (is) one of those days. He (YH ) decided that Ohr L'yom was the time to start, baby kept me up until like three (don't forget that my inlaws are here, just to add to the hAlt), and when I woke up there was that BLACK cloud, I spent a lot of time thinking about what has been for me the most helpful point[s], living in the moment, and that I am exactly where i was supposed to be (we'll get to those soon). There is a Tefilah from the Ohr Lashamyim in which we ask Hashem to help us remember that we are only in His hands (see attatchment), said that with a lot of feeling.

Morning was a blur, afternoon started trying to get around filter, called TZ and told him to get over as quickly as possible, which he did, BH. Seeing real people who know exactly what you are going through is amazing, not that I know why, but BH I feel much better.
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Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 28 Jul 2013 22:17 #213854

  • cordnoy
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great to hear that you used all the right tools to knock that y"h upside the head

one of these days, youll knock him down for a "10 count."

mr. emunah, gibbor, can we get the y"h in a cage match, five rounds, us as a tag team against him? Brazil, Motzei Shabbos, Fight of the World, Dov and his men against....!!!!!
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
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Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

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Last Edit: 28 Jul 2013 22:18 by cordnoy.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 28 Jul 2013 22:29 #213860

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and now for what has helped me until now: (thanks inna for the idea)

1 and 2 (I think they come hand in hand with each other)

no specific order

1) One moment at a time!!!

2) I am exactly where I am SUPPOSED to be!!


I'll try expounding at a more quiet time.
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
Last Edit: 28 Jul 2013 22:29 by Pidaini.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 29 Jul 2013 00:20 #213873

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sorry just had an epiphany,

I mentioned before that I don't know why seeing someone real makes a difference, and I just thought of a p'shat.

As mentioned, Rabbi Akiva Tatz observes that the oppertune time for the YH to wage war is when a person is in doubt about where he is in life, and what exactly he is about. For some reason there are times when we are around other people (namely my inlaws, even though they do not do anything to provoke such nonsense) we get a sudden pressure of what we are supposed to be and what we aren't. it makes an emotional vacume, that needs to be satiated.

So TZ comes over. He knows me, he knows who I am where I am holding right now, both my struggles and my feats, and he shows me that I am perfectly fine just where I am, that shuts the vacume takes away the instablity, and sets me back on my feet.

Just a thought, and another big Thank you for TZ.
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
Last Edit: 29 Jul 2013 01:09 by Pidaini.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 29 Jul 2013 19:36 #213973

  • ZemirosShabbos
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TZ makes it EZ!
TZ makes it EZ!
TZ makes it EZ!
yeah!
Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 30 Jul 2013 00:51 #214021

  • gibbor120
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cordnoy wrote:
great to hear that you used all the right tools to knock that y"h upside the head

one of these days, youll knock him down for a "10 count."

mr. emunah, gibbor, can we get the y"h in a cage match, five rounds, us as a tag team against him? Brazil, Motzei Shabbos, Fight of the World, Dov and his men against....!!!!!

I'll only agree to a cage match on condition the Y"H is in one cage and I am in another cage that is in another building, in another country, on another continent (preferably the Antartctica where everyone dresses b'tzniyus) .

No fighting of the Y"H allowed! I can't fight a malach, can you???

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 30 Jul 2013 15:21 #214093

good word: epiphony

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 31 Jul 2013 22:05 #214349

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just some thoughts, not particularly in any specific order.

One moment at a time, for me (please put that in very frequently), means not thinking about the past (fairly easy) nor about the future (hard). The only thing I need to worry about is what I can change, and the only thing I can affect is the present. (not to mean that i shouldn't make boundries for the future, because if what I can do now will for cetainbe a change in the future then it is really a part of now, not part of the future-if that makes any sense). that takes away a thought that used to come to me very often "you can't continue living with this crazy temptation forever anyway", I now answer it, "that's not my problem right now, when I get to forever I'll deal with it". It has helped in so many other areas as well, not to get upset at things that people did, or things that happened, "what can I do NOW about it?." it's a life saver (for me).

But I found that it only works with acceptance of the fact that I didn't put myself where I am at the moment. Hashem creates the world every second, and He puts me in this situation, with all the memories that I have, with all the emotions inside of me, with all the people around me. right now this is EXACTLY what I am supposed to be dealing with. and just as I will never understand why my hair is the color that it is, so too I may not understand why "I tried so hard, why is this happening to me?". but I know that that is not relevant to anything, it is not by accident and it is not mean, all I need to know is that where I am is the correct, nice, good, place for me.

That's all for now folks, thanks for listening and for thoughts (or arguments)!
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
Last Edit: 31 Jul 2013 22:06 by Pidaini.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 31 Jul 2013 22:21 #214350

  • ZemirosShabbos
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good stuff you got there!

i do have an argument though
Pidaini wrote:
just as I will never understand why my hair is the color that it is

if you dye your hair it usually matches the color shown on the package. was that not explained to you?
Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
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The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 31 Jul 2013 22:28 #214352

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ZemirosShabbos wrote:

if you dye your hair it usually matches the color shown on the package. was that not explained to you?

Actually, it usually matches a more shvache version of what is shown on the package. On the package they use actual paint.
"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 31 Jul 2013 22:34 #214353

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Yep yep yep.

As they say: למה יאמרו בגוים - to ask why is a goyishe inyan. The only thing we need to know that Hashem knows better. I really like the comparison to hair color. It should concern me why I have the struggle I do as much as why I have certain hair color. Simple as that.

(Btw, you have blue hair or something? - you must have realized you would bring on an onslaught of hair color jokes...)

FOR ME it made a huge difference when I realized how clear it was that I stumbled on shmutz and self-pleasure through no fault of my own and had no one to talk to about how to get out at an early stage which brought me to where I am today. There is no doubt in my mind that the RBSHO wanted me to serve Him from mitoch the darkness. Hence, He clearly knows why but its not my eisek. Not that it excuses my actions but the notion that I could have or should have had a different situation is ridiculous. I just have to do what He wants of me today, in this moment. (Please, RBSHO, help me remember that last point!)
אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 31 Jul 2013 23:19 #214361

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MendelZ wrote:
As they say: למה יאמרו בגוים - to ask why is a goyishe inyan.

I never heard anyone say that, but I LIKE it!
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