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Yaakov's Ladder
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Yaakov's Ladder 160247 Views

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 11 Oct 2013 20:26 #220934

  • ZemirosShabbos
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זה הקטן גדול יהיה
כשם שנכנס אדר מרבים בשמחה כך יכנס פדני ג'וניו"ר לכל משך חייו מתוך שמחה והרחבת הדעת
ולאביו שליט"א ברכתי שטוחה שיעלה מעלה מעלה על במתי אוינ"ק יחד עם החבריא קדישא אנ"ש וכל אנשי גי"א הנכבדים
כעתירת המברך
זמר מס' 17
גן החיות התנכ"י
ירושלים תובב"א
Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 12 Oct 2013 21:31 #220952

  • MBJ
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Mazel Tov. Born on Shabbos Lech Lecha is perfect fodder for a bris dvar torah.
My Story
Only when we make our real lives sweeter than our fantasies will we reap the emotional rewards, the happiness of recovery. - AlexEliezer
Focus on making the right choices as they come up. - Skeptical
When I start to literally accept G-d's Will as guiding my life today, things start to change. - Dov

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 13 Oct 2013 02:50 #220954

  • Pidaini
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Thank YOu all for all the kind wishes!!

Iy"h by all the chevrah in the right time!!
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 13 Oct 2013 16:24 #220989

  • TehillimZugger
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ZemirosShabbos wrote:
זה הקטן גדול יהיה
כשם שנכנס אדר מרבים בשמחה כך יכנס פדני ג'וניו"ר לכל משך חייו מתוך שמחה והרחבת הדעת
ולאביו שליט"א ברכתי שטוחה שיעלה מעלה מעלה על במתי אוינ"ק יחד עם החבריא קדישא אנ"ש וכל אנשי גי"א הנכבדים
כעתירת המברך
זמר מס' 17
גן החיות התנכ"י
ירושלים תובב"א

Lacho Ois Hoich
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 13 Oct 2013 16:24 #220990

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ZemirosShabbos wrote:
זה הקטן גדול יהיה
כשם שנכנס אדר מרבים בשמחה כך יכנס פדני ג'וניו"ר לכל משך חייו מתוך שמחה והרחבת הדעת
ולאביו שליט"א ברכתי שטוחה שיעלה מעלה מעלה על במתי אוינ"ק יחד עם החבריא קדישא אנ"ש וכל אנשי גי"א הנכבדים
כעתירת המברך
זמר מס' 17
גן החיות התנכ"י
ירושלים תובב"א

Lach Ois Hoich
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 15 Oct 2013 23:51 #221215

lechavod the birth of JR im trying to end my crazy gaming marathon. today was completely gaming free!
i used to look back all the time saying "oh no! what have i done! Hashem help me erase the past." and i never heard a response.
finally i started looking forward saying "Hashem i'm leaving the past to you and i'm forgetting all about it. help me have a good future. help me from here and on be the person You want me to be." and that's where i realized Hashem had been waiting to help me all along

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 16 Oct 2013 01:47 #221221

  • Pidaini
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WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!!

Join the club

I AM GAME-FREE!!!!!

On that note, I got a new game on my cell phone. Nu nu it's not online so it's ok to waste half my day on it, no?

We're not going to mention the fact that the mobile site has ads, and let's say they're um..... notso kosher. Did I just mention that?

But being the head of a club.....I just deleted it, THANKS MONKEY!!!!
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 16 Oct 2013 01:56 #221223

  • Pidaini
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I wrote:
I am Iy'H, Bli Neder, starting a new count. A count for days free of playing online games. It takes away from my life, or actually, it takes away my life!!! It sounds a little funny, but I think I may be addicted to it.

So it's the same rule,

One moment at a time, meaning, I have plenty of things to do (I even wrote myself a note of things so that when I think "why not, what else should i do?" I should find things easily) I just have to make the right choice to do what is important and lasting.

First Day
יום ג' לסדר דברים
ב' מנחם אב תשע"ג


According to that, I missed my 90 day party :'( (are there tashlumin?)

But that does mean that I am up to around 97 days!!!

Thanks again turtle monkey
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
Last Edit: 16 Oct 2013 14:16 by Pidaini.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 16 Oct 2013 14:41 #221244

mazal tov! not sure what i did but whatever it was, thats what grandpa turtle monkeys are for
i used to look back all the time saying "oh no! what have i done! Hashem help me erase the past." and i never heard a response.
finally i started looking forward saying "Hashem i'm leaving the past to you and i'm forgetting all about it. help me have a good future. help me from here and on be the person You want me to be." and that's where i realized Hashem had been waiting to help me all along

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 16 Oct 2013 22:01 #221294

  • Lizhensk
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I think the most amazing thing is that i feel like our whole group (OINK) are all brothers. When yankel told me about the little eagle, i felt like a proud uncle...
Life is Like a Bicycle: If its easy, you're going downhill
Hashem, If I can't have what I want, then please teach me to want what I have -Unknown (and if u know who it was please inform me)
(1+2)x4=3
There is NOTHING wrong with feeling pain -My Sponsor
I will not act out today, I will tomorrow. Maybe when I get to tomorrow, it will again be 'today'

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 16 Oct 2013 22:04 #221296

Lizhensk wrote:
I think the most amazing thing is that i feel like our whole group (OINK) are all brothers. When yankel told me about the little eagle, i felt like a proud uncle...


completely maskim.


wait, does this make me a great grandfather?
i used to look back all the time saying "oh no! what have i done! Hashem help me erase the past." and i never heard a response.
finally i started looking forward saying "Hashem i'm leaving the past to you and i'm forgetting all about it. help me have a good future. help me from here and on be the person You want me to be." and that's where i realized Hashem had been waiting to help me all along

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 16 Oct 2013 23:35 #221310

  • ZemirosShabbos
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iy"h
Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 22 Oct 2013 15:23 #221570

  • Pidaini
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Haven't been posting much, for what I think is for good reason. My story here is an absolute neis. Came on, met a few people on chat, got together, and formed OINK. For those that I met on chat that weren't in Israel, I have phone numbers and google chat. Hashem gifted me a network of real names, real voices, real people to open up to.

All of that is thanks to this wonderful forum, and the forum in itself was a lifesaver for the time until the other things took place. But now that I do have those other things, their help overshaddows that of the forum, and I found that I was trying more to boost my ego through the forum than to get help from it.

That having been said, this is the place of my rebirth that I cannot just leave, and I still have friends here as well, and I still need to keep a log for myself and by doing so maybe be able to help others as well.

Cont. Log

The last few days have been very rough, realized on friday that my filter wasn't working, and have been very fearful of the future. I was slipping myself silly starting sunday night, through last night.

During that time, I kept in touch with my OINK friends and even went to meet Doc Watson (we spent an hour together), opened up to them, I was surprised that that still isn't a magic pill.

By the meeting last night I mentioned that I was talking to real people and meeting real people, and Dovid Chiam interupts (how dare he ) "only people?!"

It hit hard, and this morning it hit really hard, I am ready to open up to (almost) anybody except for........HASHEM!!!!! I am terrified of opening up to Him!!! After telling over that realization to TZ, I knew that there the answer lay.

So I said "Hashem, I'm here to open up to You. I've slipped miserably the last few days, because I have a lot of fears now, and I am not trusting You to carry me through them in the best way possible, as only You know what way that is. So I turned to women to escape the situation that You put me, and since pictures (slipping pictures) have not done the trick I was planning on disabling the filter entirely and going to (falling) vids. But now I am here, asking You to help me see that You are carrying me, loving me and waiting for me to look to you." I included the fears in that conversation.

I call it a conversation because I felt Hashem answering me, understanding me as if to say "I understand you, I do not expect you to be able to see Me all the time when I have hidden Myself so well. I am so happy that you came to me"

Thank you Hashem, I am trying to love You too!!!

P.S. I think that is terrifying, telling Hashem that I don't trust Him

P.P.S that wanting to disable the filter thing, is gone for the moment
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
Last Edit: 22 Oct 2013 15:25 by Pidaini.

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 22 Oct 2013 16:31 #221574

  • MBJ
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That was beautiful.

If you stop coming to the forum, that will be some much of a loss to the forum. You are in the list of people that I have learned so much from, including this post. So thank you.
My Story
Only when we make our real lives sweeter than our fantasies will we reap the emotional rewards, the happiness of recovery. - AlexEliezer
Focus on making the right choices as they come up. - Skeptical
When I start to literally accept G-d's Will as guiding my life today, things start to change. - Dov

Re: Yaakov's Ladder 22 Oct 2013 19:01 #221584

  • ZemirosShabbos
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MBJ wrote:
That was beautiful.

If you stop coming to the forum, that will be some much of a loss to the forum. You are in the list of people that I have learned so much from, including this post. So thank you.

exactly my thoughts too
Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ
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