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TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful)
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This is a board for all the important threads that we don't want to get lost among the others :-)
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TOPIC: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 1294 Views

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 04 Dec 2019 19:03 #345740

  • sleepy
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Mark18 wrote on 04 Dec 2019 18:51:

sleepy wrote on 04 Dec 2019 17:54:

Mark18 wrote on 04 Dec 2019 03:21:

sleepy wrote on 25 Nov 2019 22:59:
Hello. since the thank or not thank discussion was overcrowding the big o dilemma,a suggestion was given to me by one of the level headed posters to start a new thread on the issue .
The real name to the thread was supposed to be 
"TO BE (grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) ,
THAT IS THE QUESTION I ASK OF THEE"
but it was too many words.So Hatzlacha!

I will begin this thread - thank you Hashem/My Father from my heart for bringing me to my brothers here and all of their varied posts and perspectives which give me untold chizuk and frankly without whom i would not be clean and wouldnt have the insights and deeper perspective which i now have. These guys are life and soul savers.







@mark18,i noticed that some people have made your karma to -4,please do not be discouraged or disheartened  by this, since you came to gye with your tremendous experience in counseling hundreds (was it thousands?) as chasanim ( people from the far right to the far left,)much light has been shed on certain matters of intamicy, chazak viematz,may you and us all make further strides in this nisayon!






Thank you for your very kind words and chizuk. I truly feel from my heart that i am with my brothers here even those who disagree with me. Other than Hashem/my Father to whom else can you bare your heart and soul and know they truly understand and have lived/are still living with these challenges and struggles. My communal abd klei kodesh notwithstanding i was "blessed" with an incredible yetzer hara and very very strong taivos that only my brothers and Hashem/my Father knows. My wife is totally unaware of the true extent of my taivos although she certainly benefits greatly from my taivos during sex. The rest of the matters at hand including extremely strong ssa i share here to my two incredible anonymous telephone mentors and to Hashem/my Father. Everything else i take to my grave with me. Because of these mentors and my brothers here i have not acted out for over a month although there have been some times when i was at the jumping point for a serious fall which i would have really enjoyed but is just not worth the aftermath. This forum and the live chat have saved me many times even when i was at the point of no return. Its strange living a kind of double life. As to the "karmas" i pay absolutely no attention to them nor do i ever look at them regarding myself or anyone else because i dont believe or think they have any worth whatsoever. Thank you again my brother.
i just reposted your above post, thats how it should look when you quote this way its noticeble where does the quote end and your new post start,but if you dont care, np.
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post
Feel free to email me at
wakesleepyup@mail.com
Last Edit: 04 Dec 2019 19:11 by sleepy.

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 08 Dec 2019 20:36 #345843

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lionking wrote on 04 Dec 2019 05:35:

sleepy wrote on 03 Dec 2019 19:21:
its really amazing how stingy and cheap people are with their thank yous

Thank you's used to be a very cherished thing, until someone came along and thanked every post thereby cheaping the value of the thanks.

I have a secret formula to determine whether to thank a post.
2% of it is if the post is inspiring to me. 4% of it is if it will hold me back from masturbating.
3% is my mood.
99% is pure randomness.
Did I ever say I'm good at math?!

Sorry guys I've been out of town hence slow to reply . I like Lion King's formula it's really the honest truth it really depends on the mood and if you want you can PM me certain things that make me in the mood I'm not giving someone a thank you but ultimately I think what you're seeing is don't do it for the thank yous and the less you do it for it eventually you'll see you'll get more of them anyways.

I have specific ideas why some people are not thanked I'm not sure if I should if I should share those ideas publicly because it may not be too kind.

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 09 Dec 2019 10:19 #345856

  • bego
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 although she certainly benefits greatly from my taivos during sex. 


I genuinely cant believe you wrote that.

People - am i missing something here?

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 15 Dec 2019 06:36 #345955

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i didnt take anything wrong from the statement , i think mark 18 just wants to let us know that even though he has a struggle with tay'va ,we shouldnt suspect him that he abuses his wife and fulfills his tayvos at the expense of his wifes discomfort , because he knows how to treat a wife and shes happy .
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post
Feel free to email me at
wakesleepyup@mail.com

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 15 Dec 2019 19:21 #345967

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Expressing gratitude helps people feel good about themselves — which improves their self-esteem. It makes other people want to show gratitude too, a phenomenon known as ‘upstream reciprocity’ — the experience of gratitude may naturally lead to an expression of gratitude.

I am here to be helped by helping others
ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 16 Dec 2019 13:32 #345991

  • Hakolhevel
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DavidT wrote on 15 Dec 2019 19:21:

Expressing gratitude helps people feel good about themselves — which improves their self-esteem. It makes other people want to show gratitude too, a phenomenon known as ‘upstream reciprocity’ — the experience of gratitude may naturally lead to an expression of gratitude.


DavidT no disrespect meant. Just pointing out,  your post was must be about theory, not practice, as I noticed you didn't thank any of the previous posts 

Hence it doesn't have a bearing on the practical application of how to use the thank you button iny this forum which is the discussion at hand.
Last Edit: 16 Dec 2019 13:33 by Hakolhevel.

Re: TO BE(grateful)OR NOT TO BE(grateful) 16 Dec 2019 13:49 #345992

  • DavidT
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Hakolhevel wrote on 16 Dec 2019 13:32:

DavidT wrote on 15 Dec 2019 19:21:

Expressing gratitude helps people feel good about themselves — which improves their self-esteem. It makes other people want to show gratitude too, a phenomenon known as ‘upstream reciprocity’ — the experience of gratitude may naturally lead to an expression of gratitude.


DavidT no disrespect meant. Just pointing out,  your post was must be about theory, not practice, as I noticed you didn't thank any of the previous posts 

Hence it doesn't have a bearing on the practical application of how to use the thank you button iny this forum which is the discussion at hand.

Now I can thank you for showing me how to be more aware of the content before posting
I am here to be helped by helping others
ahavayirah@gmail.com
Last Edit: 16 Dec 2019 13:49 by DavidT.
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