Read once, then minimize to save screen space.

Forum Overview

Post on the forum to get support, tell your story and reach out for help when feeling weak!

You will never be alone in this struggle again.

The GYE forum is anonymous platform of group support, and a life-line of chizuk for hundreds of people in exactly your situation. 

To use the forum you need to first become a member of the site, sign up here.

After signing up to the site, go to the forum, enter one of our boards and press "New Topic" to begin posting! 

Welcome, Guest

Mesayin's Motivative Messages
(0 viewing) 
Welcome to our forum! Introduce yourself here (anonymously, of course) and get a warm welcome from the rest of the community!

TOPIC: Mesayin's Motivative Messages 36240 Views

Re: My story 17 Nov 2015 18:28 #268853

  • Shlomo24
  • Current streak: 1 day
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 2213
  • Karma: 131
shmulyz18 wrote:

I was involved with a kid when I was a HS Freshman. This kid had a sexual sense of humor, and I followed his lead. We started talking inappropriately, and he printed the messages and turned them into the principal. He tricked me into sinning. I am now a Senior and a whole lot wiser now, B'H. So what ever the YH wants you to do, tell him you are a G-d fearing Jew and not a sinner. I hope this helps.




WOW! the fact that ur here as a high school senior is very chashuv. keep it up!
What works for me: 1) Honesty 2) Meetings 3) 12-step 4) Listening to my Sponsor 5) Not doing what I want to do 6) Inviting the God of my understanding into my life

"I can't do it, God can help." | "Everything I want is on the other side of fear." | "Where there is deprivation there is addiction." | "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery." | "Stop stopping, start living."

My thread: Big Steps

Email: iam24zman@gmail.com
Last Edit: 17 Nov 2015 19:44 by skeptical.

Re: My story 03 Feb 2016 23:35 #276546

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
Depression lust Depression lust Depression lust, it is a vicious cycle.

In my expeirences, I think I have used part of the 12 step program without even knowing it.

Meaning, the way I try to get out of depression is to know two things:

1. Happiness is in the mind, not the things that happen to me or things I obtain, the AR"I hakadosh says that בשמחה is the same letters as מחשבה and the bal shem tov says the word שמח is שם מח, so despite what today's american culture which says that what you have is makes you happy (that is a shmooz for itself) the truth is, is that it is all perception, how we look at things that determines happiness and that nothing and no one in the world can give me or take away from my happiness.

2. I may have very good excuses to be depressed; abusive and disfunctional home, struggling with parnassah, going through the tough shiduchim parsha, etc.. Those are certified justifications to be depressed, but I'm not looking to be right, I'm not looking for excuses, what I'm looking for is true happiness and that cannot be obtained if keep on making justifications, even if they are good justifications.

Just like the guy that is crossing the street when it's green and there is a car zooming down the block but the guy keeps walking and saying "I'm right, the light is green", that guy ended up dead right.

I hope I was clear.

Chazak V'emutz
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes
Last Edit: 03 Feb 2016 23:35 by Mesayin.

Re: My story 04 Feb 2016 19:41 #276656

  • gibbor120
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
  • Posts: 5250
  • Karma: 158
Very clear.  Hashem should give you strength.

Re: My story 10 Feb 2016 19:34 #277436

  • shmulyz19
  • OFFLINE
  • Banned
  • I am lucky to be alive each day. Thank you HaShem
  • Posts: 160
  • Karma: -1
Shlomo24 wrote on Unknown:





WOW! the fact that ur here as a high school senior is very chashuv. keep it up!


Thank you, Shlomo. I some how uninstalled the vcf filter on my laptop and I almost fell, but I got it back on.  I typed a bad website, but BH it did not go through. I am doing better.
I am not a therapist offering advice. I am merely a concerned poster and Friend.. You can do it. KOT. 

Please chat me anytime. I'm all ears. Thank You
Thank you... Shmuly

Re: My story 17 Feb 2016 21:20 #278254

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
I wrote in another thread that a big problem for me is that the yetzer harah keeps coming to me with loopholes, saying: nah this is not so bad... There is no issur... just check it out for a second...  And that's where he gets me.

I thought of a possible solution, is to constantly keep on guard by listening to shiurim, posting on this site, learning about lust, etc... those things keep me on guard so I don't fall for the loopholes.
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes

Re: My story 17 Feb 2016 23:09 #278264

  • cordnoy
  • Current streak: 211 days
  • NOW ONLINE
  • Moderator
  • I'm sailin', for I've got to be free
  • Posts: 11281
  • Karma: 521
I know by me I need somethin' that is in my head.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: My story 18 Feb 2016 03:13 #278280

  • Markz
  • Current streak: 87 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 7209
  • Karma: 373
Mesayin wrote:
I wrote in another thread that a big problem for me is that the yetzer harah keeps coming to me with loopholes, saying: nah this is not so bad... There is no issur... just check it out for a second...  And that's where he gets me.

I thought of a possible solution, is to constantly keep on guard by listening to shiurim, posting on this site, learning about lust, etc... those things keep me on guard so I don't fall for the loopholes.


Mesayin you were asking me for a link in the forums for discussion of
HILCHOS SHMIRAS EINAYIM

Sorry I forgot - It's in the 'Mark of Torah'
HERE

It's not necessarily authoritative, but worth a read
Enjoy

Keep On T(orah-anytime)
My Story---------Dov Quotes


What works for me:
ForumInternet Restrictions




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story

Re: My story 18 Feb 2016 21:32 #278361

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
cordnoy wrote on Unknown:
I know by me I need somethin' that is in my head.
 

Care to explain what somethin'? 
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes

Re: My story 18 Feb 2016 21:51 #278365

  • cordnoy
  • Current streak: 211 days
  • NOW ONLINE
  • Moderator
  • I'm sailin', for I've got to be free
  • Posts: 11281
  • Karma: 521
Mesayin wrote on Unknown:

cordnoy wrote on Unknown:
I know by me I need somethin' that is in my head.

 

Care to explain what somethin'? 

i always do....on my calls and here.
Distractions work as long as one has access to them and one has the will. Livin' life is always accessible, and who doesn't want life?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: My story 19 Feb 2016 17:12 #278451

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
cordnoy wrote on Unknown:

Mesayin wrote on Unknown:

cordnoy wrote on Unknown:
I know by me I need somethin' that is in my head.


 

Care to explain what somethin'? 

i always do....on my calls and here.
Distractions work as long as one has access to them and one has the will. Livin' life is always accessible, and who doesn't want life?
 

Well I wasn't really talkin' about "distractions"  I was talking about keeping my guard up, but both are good ideas.
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes

Re: My story 25 Feb 2016 21:19 #279280

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
I'm only 22 but sometimes I feel like I'm 32 when it comes to "waiting" for shidduchim.

Here is some experience I have collected in the process:

Obviously when I have a slight slip (looked at the wrong thing, thoughts of lust etc...) then it becomes harder and I become depressed about my shidduch status, but I've come to realize that this depression feeling is just a passing thing and that as soon as the lustful thought go out of my head then I would be happy again, additionally I try convincing  myself that marriage is not a hospital for lust and I really don't want to marry because of it.

Really the only way to stay happy while struggling with shidduchim is bitachon in Hashem, I don't think there is another way, here are a few bitachon tips:

1. Hashem feels my entire pain but he is still holding it back from me cause he loves me and knows that it is best for me not to have one yet.
2. Every prayer and every good deed I do as a zchus for shidduchim gets stored away, even if I don't get answered right away, Hashem puts them in a safe place and later in my life when I need it then he will use it.
3. There is one good thing about being single, it's that the pain of it builds me and makes me strong to face up to challenges which is needed a lot in married life, plus I get more mature and I will be more appreciative of my rebbitzin whenever I get married (Bkuroiv mamesh umein).

It use to be that when I had a fall or a slip, I used to complain to Hashem saying that if I would have had a shidduch than I wouldn't have done this, I also used to say that now Hashem MUST find me a shidduch now cause I can't fall again, but nowadays I know that Hashem set up the nesoiyin and he knows exactly what I'm going through way before I knew and he feels my pain, so now I beg Hashem like a beggar at the door, like a son to a father who doesn't owe him nothing, that he should have rachmunis on me and send me my shidduch, those are powerful teflos and even though they don't get answered right away, I know that it is being stored away for another time.

Chazak V'emutz   
 
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes

Re: My story 25 Feb 2016 22:38 #279301

  • shmulyz19
  • OFFLINE
  • Banned
  • I am lucky to be alive each day. Thank you HaShem
  • Posts: 160
  • Karma: -1
Shlomo24 wrote on 17 Nov 2015 18:28:

shmulyz18 wrote:

I was involved with a kid when I was a HS Freshman. This kid had a sexual sense of humor, and I followed his lead. We started talking inappropriately, and he printed the messages and turned them into the principal. He tricked me into sinning. I am now a Senior and a whole lot wiser now, B'H. So what ever the YH wants you to do, tell him you are a G-d fearing Jew and not a sinner. I hope this helps.


 




WOW! the fact that ur here as a high school senior is very chashuv. keep it up!

Thanks Shlomo, I am doing better. The kid blamed me by only printing half of the story, he finally came clean and we are friends now, believe it or not.
 
I am not a therapist offering advice. I am merely a concerned poster and Friend.. You can do it. KOT. 

Please chat me anytime. I'm all ears. Thank You
Thank you... Shmuly

Re: My story 03 Mar 2016 02:23 #280044

  • Markz
  • Current streak: 87 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 7209
  • Karma: 373
Mesayin wrote:
I'm only 22 but sometimes I feel like I'm 32 when it comes to "waiting" for shidduchim.

Here is some experience I have collected in the process:

Obviously when I have a slight slip (looked at the wrong thing, thoughts of lust etc...) then it becomes harder and I become depressed about my shidduch status, but I've come to realize that this depression feeling is just a passing thing and that as soon as the lustful thought go out of my head then I would be happy again, additionally I try convincing  myself that marriage is not a hospital for lust and I really don't want to marry because of it.

Really the only way to stay happy while struggling with shidduchim is bitachon in Hashem, I don't think there is another way, here are a few bitachon tips:

1. Hashem feels my entire pain but he is still holding it back from me cause he loves me and knows that it is best for me not to have one yet.
2. Every prayer and every good deed I do as a zchus for shidduchim gets stored away, even if I don't get answered right away, Hashem puts them in a safe place and later in my life when I need it then he will use it.
3. There is one good thing about being single, it's that the pain of it builds me and makes me strong to face up to challenges which is needed a lot in married life, plus I get more mature and I will be more appreciative of my rebbitzin whenever I get married (Bkuroiv mamesh umein).

It use to be that when I had a fall or a slip, I used to complain to Hashem saying that if I would have had a shidduch than I wouldn't have done this, I also used to say that now Hashem MUST find me a shidduch now cause I can't fall again, but nowadays I know that Hashem set up the nesoiyin and he knows exactly what I'm going through way before I knew and he feels my pain, so now I beg Hashem like a beggar at the door, like a son to a father who doesn't owe him nothing, that he should have rachmunis on me and send me my shidduch, those are powerful teflos and even though they don't get answered right away, I know that it is being stored away for another time.

Chazak V'emutz   

 

Mesayin - I'm a little teeny weeny bit older than you
You make me proud when I see how successful someone like you can be

Keep on the great Trucking!!
My Story---------Dov Quotes


What works for me:
ForumInternet Restrictions




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story

Re: My story 03 Mar 2016 20:18 #280146

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
Thanks Markz for the oil in my truck.
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes

Re: My story 04 Mar 2016 17:45 #280287

  • Mesayin
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • הבא ליטהר מסייעין אותו
  • Posts: 357
  • Karma: 8
markz wrote on 03 Mar 2016 02:23:

Mesayin - I'm a little teeny weeny bit older than you

 

I think I'm starting to see some white of there.
Attachments:
My thread/My story

Slogans and Sayings

Relapses and falling are inevitable, the challenge is getting up.

Tzaddikim are the not the ones that don't fall, they are the ones that fall constantly and get up constantly.

Feel free to contact me anytime through private message or chat.

Chizzuk emails by Rabbi Duvid Ashear shlita that can change your day subscribe now.

Check out my powerful tefila.

Depressed? Check out some of my jokes
Time to create page: 0.71 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes