Mazal Tov to "X-Addict" (a Bochur) upon reaching 90 Days today, on Erev Sukkos!
"X-addict" posted on our forum 4 months priviously:
Hello, regards from Stamford Hill. I'm 20 years old and have a computer with internet access in my room. I used to be a crazy addict, seriously now, I was, like, the king of p**n, but things in my life have recently come crashing down, and it's made me turn to God as opposed to pressing the self destruct button.
I have tried everything in the past to stop watching p**n, I mean everything (except throwing my PC out the window). I have put up blockers, I have got friends to type passwords in and not tell me, etc. Bottom line, jack crap, if you wanna watch it then there is nothing that could stop you. I feel it's more important to SOLVE THE BLOODY ISSUE then just block it away. As I said above, I'm very spiritually connected at the moment, and I want Hashem to help me so badly.
I have a double problem, P**N and along with it MAST... I thought about it and decided I'M STOPPING one or the other! Then I realized that if I watch the p**n and not..... NAH, IMPOSSIBLE (FOR ME), so I chose to stop watching p**n. Now how do I deal with my shizzle, well, I'm bored in my room, I started dreaming........ I'm turned on! Naturally, I'm gonna wanna watcha p**n. But instead of going straight onto xxx, I light a cigarette and sit there learning messilas yeshorim (Gates of Repentance), and I lose the will to *******
Best of luck to everyone, and just remember!!!! Every time we hold ourselves back for even a few minutes, we are on the same level as Yosef Hatzadik when he ran away from Potifar's wife!!!! And then you can ask God for anything you want!!!
4 months later we got this email:
Well, well, this is it. I've reached my short-term goal, 90 days. I remember the times I used to dream of reaching 49 days! But for me, reaching 90 is not the end of my goal. In the words of my hero Winston Churchill, "this is not the end, this is not even the beginning of the end, but it is perhaps the end of the beginning".
I am clear proof that zera lavatola and p**n can be eradicated from one's heart and soul! I was an addict, I was falling 2-3 times a day, and even after the 1st time I'd feel so guilty and promise Hashem that I would change, but only a few hours later I was back at it. With the help of GYE I realized something interesting, getting to 90 days is EASY! But getting to 30 days is hell and high water!!! Doesn't that show you all something?
The biggest factor for me and what helped the most, was the LEVELS TECHNIQUE of the 90-day chart, and the little comments on the side, for example, "Eved Hashem", "Yirei Shomayim", etc... because it made me push that little bit extra. The chart was a massive influence, every day I marked a cross on my personal chart as well. The rule is, never stop counting the days. If not for the levels, there'd be no way I'd have done it.
I b'h feel like a different person, 90 days has changed me as a person, in every part of life, I walk around with confidence, fulfillment, and nothing in life is to scary for me now! I'm 21, I'm just a normal guy, it can be done!!! Everyone has it in them! Show yourself the power within you! Prove your masculinity! Show you're a man! Be tough!!! God will give you the strength, but u gotta want it. I know that it's enjoyable going on these sites, trust me, and let's face it, it is, but it's an empty enjoyment and the implications are so not worth it!!!
Love you all, my holy brothers!!!