Lack of Integrity
 
 
  Breaking Free Chizuk #1870  
 
 
In Today's Issue
   
Announcements: ANNOUNCING: The New GYE Boost App
Torah: Battling rank-and-file
Announcements: New and Improved Yiddish GYE website launched!
Announcements: My Filter Blocks GYE
Daily Dose of Dov: It All Stems from Lack of Integrity
 
 
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Torah
 
Battling rank-and-file
 
By GYE Member

The other day I faced a big Nisayon. It wasn’t a Nisayon of Arayos per se, but more of an issue of curiosity. The Yetzer Hara was so powerful because it was trying to convince me that it wasn’t a Yetzer Hara at all. Nothing is wrong with looking, because it’s totally not Arayos. I thought to myself: no way am I going to win.

The Pasuk says, “Ki Seitzei Lamilchama Al Oyvecha” - when you go to war with your enemy, when you realize that it’s the Yetzer Hara you are battling, I promise you, says Hashem, that you will win - “Un’sano Hashem Elokecha Biyadecha.”

Oftentimes, we lose because we are tricked into thinking that the shadow of the Yetzer Hara is not the Yetzer Hara; sometimes we lose because we don’t even realize that we’re at war.

With this recognition in mind, I won that battle. Because when you remember this Pasuk, you remember that when you challenge the Yetzer Hara, Hashem guarantees victory. Ask yourself, “even if this is not technically Arayos, is it Ratzon Hashem that I should be seeing this?” You disarm the Yetzer Hara when you consider what the Ratzon Hashem is, as opposed to what is technically Assur. This mentality is so simple, yet so profoundly powerful.

What followed in my life was that the next time I faced a Nisayon of the exact same nature -"Vishavisa Shivyo" - I conquered my mind back. When I remained vigilant, the Yetzer Hara held barely any sway.

What also followed was a major Shefa of Ruchniyus into my life, so powerful that I cannot begin to describe its sweetness! What you think is ‘small’ down here in this world, makes the biggest impact in Shamayim. When you go beyond basic Shmiras Einayim, and even momentarily conquer the Yetzer Hara of curiosity, the heavens tremble from the impact you make!

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Daily Dose of Dov
 
It All Stems from Lack of Integrity
 
By Dov

Do you think your lust problem is just a side-issue for you? Do you feel that Hashem is really paying attention and showing His love for you in all the other, more normal ways - but the lust issue is just a bump in the road, or some wart you happen to have?

I cannot speak for you, especially because I do not have any inkling of you or your life and baggage. But in my own case and that of many others, being sober come way, way before any mitzva and any "avodas Hashem". No one has any qualms about doing that for running away from an ax-murderer. We all understand that. But somehow, addictions get shoved onto the back burner in the face of the more respectable and perhaps even glamorous things like: 'Keviyus itim letalmud', 'tshuvas hamishkal', 'yir'as Shomayim', and 'simchas hachayim'.

Puleez.

The poison that is in a person like me that makes my never-ending struggle to wake up and have a daily, consistent and growing real relationship with Hashem a losing proposition is not the lack of yir'as Shomayim that I have, not my lacking middos, and not my absent teshuvas hamishkal or teshuvah sheleimah, at all. It is my lack of integrity, plain and simple. Moshe Rabeinu was not chosen because of his Yir'as Shomayim, his kindness, or his chochma - he was chosen because of his integrity. Honesty and living by his principles and leaving that comfy, safe, palace to identify with his brothers. He didn't have to do any of that - but he had integrity and principles. Simple, basic fairness and integrity.

You may not be an addict, but may just have a challenge with masturbation as many people have. You may not be sick. But in my own case, I could not get anywhere near success in avodas Hashem until I started to get sober. Until then I had no integrity at all, and I knew it. And it was disgusting to me. And why not?

Do you think you may have a porn addiction?
 

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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