What do you want in your relationship?
  Breaking Free Chizuk #1867  
In Today's Issue
Announcements: New and Improved Yiddish GYE website launched!
Chizuk: When Cancer Came Knocking
Text: 6 Impossible Things
Daily Dose of Dov: What do you want in your relationships?
90 Day Journey
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New and Improved Yiddish GYE website launched!

Exciting News: New and Improved Yiddish GYE website launched!

We are happy to announce the launch of a new and improved Yiddish GYE website with many improvements and new sections. We are sure this new site will help thousands of our Yiddish speaking brothers with Shmiras Einayim and recovery from addiction. The Yiddish site includes a Handbook, an active Yiddish forum, weekly chizuk newsletters, 90-day challenge, and more.

To visit the site: https://hitdanoigen.com

When Cancer Came Knocking
By Aish.com

I once asked our oncologist if it wasn't depressing to work with sick and dying people all the time. His answer blew me away. "Everyone is going to die," he said, leaning forward over his desk, "some sooner than later. It's how we choose to live our lives that matters. My job brings me into the company of wonderful people who, despite illness and suffering, have chosen to live. I can't think of any job more rewarding than that."

It really is all about how we choose to live. So many times over the past few years people have told me that they are amazed at how positive we are. And I tell them, "It's just a matter of attitude. We can choose to sit, cry and give in to depression, or we can say, Okay, this is my life, and I'm going to live it as best as I can!"


An excerpt from an Article at Aish.com called: "When Cancer Came Knocking"


We have been notified that the link to this article in yesterday's newsletter was not working. We apologize for this mistake. Below is a working link.

If you still can't access the article, please email Mottel by replying to this email, and he will send you the full copy.

6 Impossible Things
When you husband struggles with porn addiction, some things seem impossible to believe.

When you are in the middle of a problem with porn it can easily feel like this is the way life will always be. Always hard, always hurting, always struggling. It’s easy for me to say this isn’t true but until you are out the other side you won’t believe me.

Read more
Daily Dose of Dov
What do you want in your relationships?
By Dov

The extent and quality of the relationship you end up with (with anybody, not just Hashem) depends upon what you put into it.

If I connect with my wife mainly as my personal candy machine, I get a relationship with a candy machine. Wow....profound...meaningful...satisfying...NOT.

Same l'havdil with Hashem. He can be my personal candy machine, sometimes I gotta pay for it, sometimes for free.... Still, all He is to me is my machine. He didn't make life to be that way! For us there is a real G-d there! He took us out of 'beis avodim' - slaves are like machines! But now, we are out of beis avodim because b'ni b'chori Yisrael! We are His kids now!

So: we read the 13 middos and see just Who this G-d is! Do we want more than a candy machine? Then we gotta become ovd'ey Hashem...whatever that means. Ask Yirmiyahu hanavi, who described it clearly and referred to His Rachamim.

And it takes time and work.

Same with the wife. Know her as a body.... get fun, frustration, pain, desire, more pain...more lust...mazel tov. But after it is over, it's all just memories, nothing more. Nothing tangible....is that 'real'? Anyone can play 'husband' and 'wife'. Anyone can go through the motions and even say "I love you".

But when you don't stop at that, and work to know and appreciate who she really is besides a body, (and besides even a woman!)... Now the connection can be real/tangible. And it grows, and grows. There can be joy, even when you are apart, cuz it's not an act and not just a memory.

That takes work and time. It all depends on what we want.

Do you think you may have a porn addiction?

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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