Blaming G-d
  Breaking Free Chizuk #1830  
In Today's Issue
Image of the Day
Chizuk: Blaming G-d
Torah: Hilchos Pesach and Recovery
Q & A: The Despair of an Addict
Chizuk: Stand up against any desire
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Image of the Day
Blaming G-d
In response to someone who was blaming God, "Cordnoy" wrote:
By Cordnoy

I'm sorry you feel that way.

My life (of well over four decades) has been surrounded by sickness, death, hospitals, disease, pain, therapists, doctors, psychiatrists, jail, anguish, danger, and more, and by this I am including parents and grandparents (young ones), spouse, children, siblings, teachers, and students, and I am not referring to flues, chicken pox, and speeding tickets.

And yes, all of my wonderful life I chose to ignore this and escape by the only means I knew how, and that was thru the wonderful world of lust, and boy was I good at that.

And when I began to recover, I would recoil when people spoke about God and higher power and stuff like that, for I had no idea who they were referencing. Mind you, I am a shomer torah u'mitzvos par excellence. It's not that I didn't believe in God; I just didn't know Him. And I still don't. I struggle with good and bad and Hashem's will and all, but I block that all out, for the most part.

I made lousy decisions in my life, and I needed to fix them. I went to therapists and specialists and sponsors and 12-Step meetings. It was my resolve that I messed up and I need to climb out of it. Was there Divine help? I don't care. Do I feel more of a connection now that I'm sober for over three years? At times.

But if I choose to think too much, I could get angry and end up acting out, so therefore, I don't.

Recovery is just too precious. I am finally living a life, although there is so much pain around me. The pain sucks, but I need to live, and I can only do that thru sobriety.

Godspeed to all.


Shloshim yom kodem hachag, shoalim v'dorshim b'hilchos hachag.

Thirty days before a holiday, we start learning appropriate laws (Code of Jewish Law).

Hilchos Pesach and Recovery
By Nat

I learned two halachos recently that relate to some beautiful things about recovery.

Read more
Q & A
The Despair of an Addict
Stand up against any desire

Chaza"l say that if a person is walking and he needs to say Kriyas Shema, he should "stand" and not continue walking when he says the first pasuk. The Beis Ahron of Karlin explains this to mean that one should stand firm like a beam of iron, meaning that when one accepts upon himself the yoke of heaven completely, he is able to stand up against any desire, even the greatest among the great. And, he continues, this is the meaning of true mesiras nefesh.

Do you think you may have a porn addiction?

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit (Hebrew: / Yiddish:

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit

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