A different attitude for Yomim Noroyim
  Breaking Free Chizuk #1739  
In Today's Issue
Torah: Addicts Need a Different Attitude to the Yomim Noraim
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Testimonials: Reflections
Link of the Day: How to do Teshuva without killing yourself
Member's Chizuk: "Almost" counts!
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Addicts Need a Different Attitude to the Yomim Noraim
Someone wrote to us: "I can't take the pressure of Yomim Noraim. I had a fall."
By Yaakov from GYE

Yomim Noraim is not meant to be a time of pressure. It's a time of great simcha and opportunity.

First, on Rosh Hashana, we coronate the King over us.

Then on Yom Kippur, we get forgiven for the whole year's sins, like a filthy child whose father gives him a shower once a year!

Then on Sukkos, our Father - our King rejoices with us in His warm embrace!

Perhaps us addicts need to adapt a more Chassidish approach to the Yomim Noraim.

My father

Translation: A Chassid saw a Jew walking depressed. He asked him why? Answered the Jew, "Now is Elul, soon is the judgement! And why are you happy?" he asked the Chassid. "Because my father is the Judge", answered the Chassid.

אשרי העם יודעי תרועה

This thought occurred to me on Rosh Hashana while saying the the Pasuk "לא הביט און ביעקב ולא ראה עמל בישראל ה' אלוקיו עמו ותרועת מלך בו" in Mussaf.

Translation: "He gazes not at sin in Yaakov and sees not toil in Yisrael, Hashem his G-d with with Him and the trumpeting of the King is within him".

It says in the Zohar that the Satan gets confused when he hears the shofar sounding and can't prosecute.

But what does that mean? He is a Malach! How does some noise confuse him?

When a King is coronated, there are two things are of highest importance. One, is to announce to all his subjects that he is the king! And two, is to look over the state of his people's loyalty and make decisions as to how to get them to be more loyal to him (some will have to die, some will be promoted, some punished, etc).

This is the day of Rosh Hashana, the day Hashem created the world and the day we make Him King again over us. The Jewish people were given the great honor of blowing the trumpets and announcing to all the people of the world that Hashem is the King.... At the same time, the Satan was given the job of bringing a damning "intelligence report" to the king about all the deeds that were done that year showing how disloyal people were to the King. But the two tasks don't go together very well. One symbolizes how loyal we are to the king by announcing to everyone his Kingship, and the other shows the LACK of loyalty.

So when the Satan tries to open his mouth about how disloyal the subjects have been all year round, suddenly the Jews come and blast the trumpets that announce the king's dominion. So the Satan gets very confused and can't continue! The King is smiling when he hears the trumpets - He is being made King! He can't look now at how disloyal his subjects have been, it's the opposite of what is taking place in the special coronation parade! And He will ESPECIALLY not look at how disloyal are the very ones who are actually BLOWING the trumpets!!

Perhaps that is the meaning of the pasuk: "He gazes not at sin in Yaakov and sees not toil in Yisrael, Hashem his G-d with with Him and the trumpeting of the King is within him".

Hashem can't see the bad of Yaakov - He doesn't want to listen to the Satan - when they are with Him and trumpeting his kingship to all!

May we all have a sweet year of CLOSENESS to our FATHER our KING!

Duvid Chaim Responds:

This is such an insightful and beautiful Chiddush!! So full of hope and inspiration.

One of the Satan's most effective tools with addicts, is to make us feel low about ourselves. To make us feel unworthy.

This vort is the perfect answer to those of us who wonder if we really have a fighting chance to merit another year.

With your vort, the answer is a resounding "Yes!"

May we all merit a sweet and complete year to come!

Volunteers needed

Looking for volunteers to help with our annual High Holiday campaign who want to give something back to GYE (besides financial support). If you want to help, please be in touch with Yaakov at eyes.guard@gmail.com.

Tizke Lemitzvos and have a Ksiva Vachasima Tova!

By Shlomo

Dear Guard,

I wanted to wish you a K'sivah V'Chasimah Tovah. As I reflect on Rosh Hashanah I am filled with Hakoras Hatov. B'H, look what a year could bring. Last year at this time, I didn't know much about GYE, I didn't know much about the 12 steps, I didn't know Duvid Chaim and I didn't know about meaningful recovery. Thanks to your great organization and the incredible work that you do, I have so much to be thankful for. May you continue to see pairos from all your efforts. Not only are touching our lives, through each one of us, you are impacting the lives of our families and those that are close to us.

Tizkeh Lmitzvos and thank you so much.

Link of the Day

Free e-book by Rabbi Avi Tenenbaum

How to do Teshuva without killing yourself
Member's Chizuk
"Almost" counts!
By GYE Member

We know that the Sota is a woman who is suspected of committing adultery. This claim is based on the fact that she was caught in seclusion with a man who is not her husband. She has to drink the potion to determine the truth - did she commit adultery or not. If she did, she is cursed. If she didn’t she gets huge Brachos: if she was barren, she will bear children. If until this day, she had only girls, she will give birth to boys. And so on. The question is - why does she get a Bracha if it was found that she didn't commit adultery. The fact is - she secluded herself with another man. Shouldn’t she should be punished?

The Torah however, looks at it differently. This woman was on the way to do an Aveira with the man. Not only was she on the way, she almost did it. She was alone with him. She was so close to falling - and she said no. She had the power to say I'm not going through with this. I am going to stop now. I don't care how far I have fallen. I'm with you Hashem. No one else can see me doing this apart from you.

Sometimes we feel that when we slip - it's all over. The lesson of the Sotah is that even after one has slipped, when he/she could go all the way, all is not yet lost. When we slip and we say I could go all the way but I am going to hold myself back, it could be greater than never even slipping.

Do you think you may have a porn addiction?

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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