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  Breaking Free Chizuk #1351  
 
 
In Today's Issue
   
Image of the Day
Torah: Freedom through the Eye
Sayings: "Anger" is but one letter away from "danger".
Member's Chizuk: T'fila in times of tests
Daily Dose of Dov: Hightail it out of Dodge!
Links: Researchers discover brain changes behind sex addiction
 
 
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Image of the Day
 

Artwork by Peloni Almoni. Used with permission.

 
Torah
 
Freedom through the Eye
 
וכי יכה איש את עין עבדו או את עין אמתו ושחתה לחפשי ישלחנו תחת עינו – שמות כא:כ
 
By Yaakov from GYE

The Pasuk says (Shemos 21:26) "If a man hits the eye of his servant or the eye of his maidservant and damages it, to freedom he shall send him in place of his eye".

When a person can’t control what he looks at he becomes a slave to the Yetzer Hara. But the Pasuk is telling us that if we break the koach of the eye through Shmiras Einayim, we will find real FREEDOM from all our obsessions and be able to serve Hashem properly. Through the merit of Shmiras Einayim alone, a person can reach true freedom in Avodas Hashem.

But the Pasuk says “Yakeh” which means “hit”. Because at first it feels painful to turn away, but we must accept this pain with azus of Kedusha, until, over time it becomes second nature to turn away. As Yehudah Ben Teima says: “Kal Kanesher – be light as an eagle” – and it says in the Tur Shulchan Aruch (Siman Alef) that this is referring to shmiras einayim.

Note also that the pasuk says "eye" and not "eyes". Hashem doesn't ask us to give up our eyesight completely. Aderaba, we need our eyesight to be able to serve Hashem properly; to be able to work, be good parents, good spouses, good Jews, learn Torah and appreciate the beauty of Hashem’s world. Hashem only asks us to break one aspect of our eyesight - like a person who is blind in one eye and can still do 99% of things he needs to do. Hashem asks us only to give up taking pleasure through our eyesight from things that we shouldn't. And with this alone, we can be zoche to "go free" from the painful servitude of the Yetzer Hara and be zoche to serve Hashem with joy!

Sayings
 
"Anger" is but one letter away from "danger".
 
Member's Chizuk
 
T'fila in times of tests
 
By Mesayin

I have a great tool that helped me a ton.
It's a small but powerful tefila that works instantly, and according to the guy that taught it to me, it works for everyone.

First, a few things to point out before I begin.

It's important to know that we always have bechira (choice), even though sometimes it seems too hard. We do have a choice, but Hashem helps us with our nisyoinois and without His help we would be living dead people L"A.

There are two conditions to keep in mind in order for this tefilah to work.

1. Concentration on the words is needed, it won't work if you blabber the words.
2. Sincerity is needed, it doesn't work if you do not sincerely want to get rid of the nisoiyin.

Here it is.


Ribono shel olam I have a nisayon of... (say the nisayon)
The gemara says אלמלא הקב״ה עוזרו אינו יכול לו (Which means, if Hashem doesn't help out against the yetzer harah then he (the man) won't be able to withstand him)
I ask a chesed from Hashem to take away from me this nisayon.

Daily Dose of Dov
 
Hightail it out of Dodge!
 
Someone posted that the struggle is too hard and he feels like giving up. Dov responds:
 
By Dov

When I feel that way, I get me to a meeting. We gotta get out of our heads and take actions of love whenever we are too filled up with self-concern, even good self-concern - and it's too much self-concern if it is leading me a direction like giving up, sadness, or anything else that can't possibly be what Tatty wants for me. Hightail it out of Dodge, buddy!

Links
 

Certain changes in brain function help distinguish people with sex addiction from others not affected by this condition, according to recent findings from a group of British and American researchers.

*****This link will take you to a site outside of GYE network. While we vetted it and found it to contain no objectionable imagery, viewer discretion is advised.****

Researchers discover brain changes behind sex addiction

Exerpt:

"A person with sex addiction has problems with sexual fantasy, sexual thinking or real-world sexual behavior that significantly damage his or her ability to lead a stable life centered on a sense of emotional well-being. Specific problems associated with the condition include the recurring use of sex or sexual thought/fantasy as an “escape” from unpleasant situations or moods, loss of control over sexual behavior or sexual thought/fantasy, a compelling and recurring need to participate in sexual activities that don’t necessarily bring pleasure, a sex-related inability to meet core responsibilities or obligations and a recurring involvement in dysfunctional sexual activity or sexual thought/fantasy that damages the ability to form stable personal, social or professional relationships with others.

Men and women can develop a sex addiction related to real-world sexual interactions with others, pornography use or other avenues of sexual expression. However, symptoms of the condition can vary considerably between the two genders, and doctors can easily fail to recognize addictive sexual thoughts or behaviors in women. Sex addiction can also appear in people of all sexual orientations. Unfortunately, the condition has no standard reference for diagnosis in the U.S. Doctors rely on a range of screening tools to identify sex addiction in general, a specific addiction to pornography use or a specific addiction to Internet-based pornography use (sometimes known as cybersex addiction)."

Do you think you may have a porn addiction?
 

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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