The Importance of Taking the Actions of Recovery
 
 
  Breaking Free Chizuk#1344  
 
 
In Today's Issue
   
Editor’s Note: Action-packed newsletter
Image of the Day: Don't Wait to Take a Positive Action
Announcements: Duvid Chaim's 12-Step Phone Conference: New Cycle
Testimonials: To SA or not to SA? That is the question...
Torah: T'shuvas Hamishkal
Daily Dose of Dov: Using Lust
Practical Tips: Psychological factors in sexual acting out
 
 
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Editor’s Note
 
Action-packed newsletter

Dear GYE family,

hope your week was full of goodness and packed with recovery action. In case in you need more boost to propel you towards proactive steps to take in your recovery, we bring you this newsletter, featuring Dov's take on the use of lust, someone's expereince with SA and other recovery options, and Rav Vosner's legal opinion pertaining to addiction.

Another suggestion for recovery action can be found on our forum. The "Good Night Blog" gives you an opportunity to check in with others and track your after-hours internet use.

If you are still more theory-inclined, Dr. Sorotzkin article on psychology of sexual acting out is for you. If you have trouble following the online link, email me and I will send it to you in its entirety via email.

Best regards for continued recovery,

Mottel

Image of the Day
 
Don't Wait to Take a Positive Action
 
Don't Wait to Take a Positive Action
Announcements
 
Duvid Chaim's 12-Step Phone Conference: New Cycle
 

Duvid Chaim Launching the 15th Cycle of his successful 12-Step phone conference!

Are you asking yourself any of the following questions:

I'm sick and tired of feeling TRAPPED IN LUST. I've stopped before - had some sobriety - but always seem to fall back into it again and again. What can I do to finally STOP?!

or

I've already worked the 12 Step Program. I think I know what it's supposed to do for me. But it doesn't work! This is so frustrating. This Program will never work for me! Is there any hope for me?!

PLEASE JOIN US FOR

THE LAUNCH of the

"LIFE CHANGING" VOYAGE OF THE GYE15 - CRUISE TO FREEDOM

Beginning a new cycle on

MONDAY OCTOBER 19TH, 2015

  • 8:30am EST with Cap'n Steve

  • 12 Noon EST with Duvid Chaim

  • 9:30 pm EST with Cap'n Yehudah

    Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays!

    The Conference Call-In Number is 641-715-3836

    Participant Access Code 637207#

    We are going to strive to make this Cruise - Bigger and Better than ever -

    with more Veterans,

    more Chavrusahs,

    more Sponsors and

    more Guest Speakers.

    We will be enriching our Recovery Program with the latest and most effective

    Exercises and Life Changing Processes available.

    Please send an email to

    to let us know you are planning to be ON BOARD.

    "This may be the most important decision of your life!"

    See this page for more information

Testimonials
 
To SA or not to SA? That is the question...
 
By Anonymous

Dear GYE,

In 2011, I discovered that I had a problem and I turned to you guys, who eventually sent me to a 12-step group. I stayed clean for 3.5 years with relatively good recovery. My wife, however, hated the groups so much that we almost divorced over them. She could not fathom being married to an addict and to someone who has friends whom she claimed were "pedophiles." We found a Rabbi, and he restored our marriage; my wife is happy now, very happy, but the condition was that I should leave the groups, which I did 6 months ago. Instead, he told me to get a Kosher phone, which I did as well.

As long as the phone was "kosher," I was good, but my phone broke, and when I got a new phone, it was unlocked, and I fell many times. I am ashamed and sad about this. Yes, I'm still better off than I was, but I knew it would just be a matter of time before I get possessed by this addiction again, so I came back to GYE. There is so much here! I am very grateful, and I hope that the tools of GYE will suffice to keep me strong.

But I'd just like to give a shout-out about a few things that we can all learn from my story: (1) It's a powerful illustration of the incurable disease of addiction. (2) I strongly disagree with this Rabbi's ridiculous notion that all you need is a kosher phone. It cost me over three years of sobriety!

Torah
 
T'shuvas Hamishkal
 
By Anonymous

Rav Vosner gave a t'shuva to someone who was asking for a seder t'shuvas hamishkal for aveiros that had been done continuously for many years. Rav Vosner brings a Yismach Moshe who says that t'shuvas hamishkal is only neccesary for a one-time aveira. But for an addiction, it is enough the tremendous effort and accomplishment of getting over the addiction!

The Yismach Moshe said that this was revealed to him in a dream. Rav Vosner says that although we don't pasken based on dreams, this we do pasken, because it is true!

(Cheilek 4, tshuva 55).

Daily Dose of Dov
 
Using Lust
 
Are you really unable to use lust?
 
By Dov

Ask yourself if you still really believe you are unable to use the behaviors you used to depend on, and if you are unable to control them at all and are really finished with them. Then, ask Hashem to help you stay clean today. I never ask for His help to tomorrow. (Ok, really I do because I'm not all that healthy, but I usually quickly correct my mistake and ask for only today!)

Take Hashem with you through each step you take. It'll be OK.

Practical Tips
 
Psychological factors in sexual acting out
 
Part 2/3
 
By Sorotzkin, Dr. Benzion

What are the early emotional traumas that may make it more likely for someone to develop an addiction to sexual acting out? There are many different possibilities, of course, but the following is a small sampling. A young child in an emotionally supportive home, when dealing with frustration, anxiety, alarm, fear, or dread will feel comfortable turning to his parents for comfort and support. They will protect, reassure, sooth and guide him, thus teaching him by their reactions that; 1) The world is not such a frightening place; 2) Most problems have solutions; 3) Sharing problems with others makes problems easier to deal with. The child will have been soothed by his parents and will learn that comfort is achieved in an interpersonal venue.

Read more
Do you think you may have a porn addiction?
 

Do you have a problem with obsessive and compulsive porn use? Have you seriously tried the tools on GYE and feel that you are not getting better? Maybe it’s time to consider joining a 12-Step program.

Porn Anonymous (PA)
If you’re compulsively acting-out with pornography and masturbation we suggest you explore joining Porn Anonymous (PA). If you need help deciding whether to join PA, call Michael at 347-699-2368, or email help@pornanonymous.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit pornanonymous.org (Hebrew: p-a.org.il / Yiddish: pa-yid.org).

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
If your compulsive acting-out has progressed beyond the screen (with other people, paid sexual services, etc.) we suggest you explore joining Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). To figure out if SA is for you, call Dov at 917-414-8205, or email Dov at dov@guardyoureyes.org to schedule a time to talk. For more information visit www.sa.org.

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